v Page 3093 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Chaos In Chicagoland: Just Who's In Charge Here?
The Bulls are on the wrong side of the tiebreaker for the last playoff spot in the East. It might not even matter for Vinny Del Negro's job security, after a very public disagreement with management over Joakim Noah's usage....

Here's Matt Cooke Getting His
The noted cheap shot artist gets knocked out with one punch, and Evander Kane never has to buy a drink in Boston ever again....

Impatience To Watch Cavs Turns Deadly
A dispute over a handicapped spot led to a Cleveland man shooting and killing a parking lot attendant before Friday's Cavs game. Put the gun away, people. It's not worth it; they were resting LeBron anyway. [Plain Dealer]...

She's Just Not That Into You
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

You Should Be Watching Hockey This Weekend, Seriously
Remember when everyone was so into hockey that time? Ha! But there's plenty to love: the NCAA championship, an NHL playoff berth battle, and oh yeah, some Slovenian hockey players who won their league title then beat up their coach!...

Lou Piniella Bawls Out With His Balls Out
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Hey Look, Everyone, It’s A Liverpool FC Fashion Show!
More than most, footballers love to dress up in gorgeous new outfits and really make a lads day out of it....

Dallas-Area Cheerleaders Piss Team Spirit, Piss
KXAS-TV does one of those routine cheerleaders-force-other-cheerleaders-to-drink-urine stories, only this one involves some gross-out B-roll and a "bad taste in their mouth" zinger as the kicker. Kudos to the awesomely monikered reporter, Ashanti Blaize. [Fat White Guy]...

John Paul Stevens Says Babe Ruth Called His Shot
How does he know? He saw it in person. Dude's old as dirt, and he's still never seen the Cubbies win it all....

Mark Sanchez Is Poised ... To Be A Whiffenpoof
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Villanova Pregnancy Hoax Email Results In Confusion, Death Threats
Yesterday, in an attempt to debunk the Fisher-Reynolds pregnancy melodrama rumor that spread via email for the past couple weeks, it appears I became the Big East's Furman Bisher instead. To clarify: It's a hoax. Like this. And this....

DePaul Wraps Up Its Coaching Search From Hell By Pissing Off The Wrong People
Following a blunder- and rejection-filled search, DePaul finally decided on Clemson's Oliver Purnell. Sounds like a good hire: basement-dwelling big-conference team nabs someone who marginally improved another basement-dwelling big-conference team. So why are Chicago hoops figures apoplectic?...

Slovenian Hockey Players Celebrate Title By Beating Up Coach
Six players from Slovenia's league champion, Acroni Jesenice, have been booted from the team after beating up their head coach in drunken post-game celebration. It's okay, though because he totally deserved his thrashing....

A Roundup Of Zombie Earl Woods Commercial Parodies (LOTS MORE UPDATES)
After the debut of Tiger's new commercial, it was inevitable that the spot would be parodied over and over again, with varying levels of success. Here are a bunch of the good ones....

The Masters Invaded By Airborne Pranksters Asking Tiger Woods About "Bootyism"
Augusta National's authoritarian fussbudgets do not yet hold dominion over the skies, as proved by whoever hired this plane to circle above The Masters today. Also, it's $1 wing night at Déjà Vu. [Video via ESPN, surprisingly.]...

Last Night's Winner: Shameless Corporate Whores
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Nike Industrial Shoe Works Corp., who made advertising history last night by somehow turning pathetic, unprincipled skirt-chasing into a compelling pitch for golf clubs....

The San "Francicso" Giants Need Spellcheck
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Jon Scheyer's Prank Was Pretty Darn Funny
Damn it. I hate when this happens. A guy you don't want to likes goes and pulls off a prank that can only be described as excellent. Goddamnit....

Villanova, Syracuse, And The Case Of The Impregnated Girlfriends (UPDATE)
Since Villanova was unceremoniously bounced from the NCAA tournament on March 21 by St. Mary's, many emails have been fired off by frustrated alumni explaining how this happened to their precious team. The reason? Corey Fisher impregnated Scottie Reynolds's girlfriend, of course....

My Fusion Site Filled with Sports, Sports, Sports, <i>Gossip Girl</i>
This week's random Deadspin starred commenter/My Fusion Site enthusiast is the one and only Bobby Big Wheel, who has made some excellent choices. Check them out below, then create your very own Gawkmodo or Jalopspin or Kotako9!...