Illinois head football coach Tim Beckman took the podium at Big 10 media days today, and the beginning of his speech was amazing. It was like watching one of Bill Brasky’s friends try to explain a complicated math problem.

What Beckman was trying to get at here was the significance of the word “Oskee,” which figures into the title of the school’s fight song. Go ahead and run it back one time, just to make sure you absorbed all of his points.

Still lost? Let’s try to break this down:

That stance that we use that word for is our success equals the knowledge of being—the K, the knowledge—of being a great student-athlete on and off the football field...

Okay, so what I think our man was going for here was the start of an acronym. Something like:

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Our
Success
=
Knowledge
E ???
E ???

Dammit. What about those E’s, Tim?

The “E” stands for “effort,” giving all-out effort in everything you do each and every day. And then the last “E” stands for “energy,” being a positive influence on the people around you, having that belief and that system of as being a teammate, being a brother—the band of brothers.

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Okay, nice. Hell yeah. I think we’ve got it:

Our
Success
=
Knowledge
Effort
Energy

Put that shit on a T-shirt.

h/t Steve