Well, it's Father's Day on Sunday, and nowhere in the world of entertainment are there more fathers — known and otherwise — than in the world of sports. The Shawn Kemp picture is an obvious joke, an obvious joke we were completely helpless to resist.
But if you thought Kemp — seven kids by six women — was the all-time baby daddy champ, you're wrong. 100 Percent Injury Rate has the all-time champs, including Evander Holyfield and former Spurs point guard Willie Anderson. Derrick Thomas was on pace to shatter all records, with seven kids, but he died at 33, ending the breathtaking run.
Elsewhere, Every Day Should Be Saturday has a guide to help you figure out what kind of dad you have, and, most happily, Kissing Suzy Kolber has re-run Big Daddy Drew's classic The Perfect Father's Day timeline, featuring the immortal phrase, "Drink a bottle of Cristal. Listen to 'Master of Puppets' in its entirety, singing both the vocal and guitar parts. Come up with the idea for a cologne that smells like gunfire. Call my brother to have it patented."
Happy Father's Day!
It Should Be A Busy Father's Day For These Guys [100 Percent Injury Rate]
Father's Day Gifts For The College Football Man [Every Day Should Be Saturday]
Father's Day Fit For A Fucking Badass [Kissing Suzy Kolber]