Ryan Dempster Says ... No Wait ... He Says ... Really ... The Cubs ... Ha ... Sorry, We Just Can'tS

You'll have to forgive us, considering this happened pretty early in the day yesterday, but, well ... sometimes we just can't help ourselves. We have to point out legendary romantic Ryan Dempster's bold proclamation for the Cubs this season.

Some of you might note that this year is the 100th anniversary of the Cubs' last World Series title. (Some of you, if you're like us, will note this often, and loudly.) Ryan Dempster says that's the perfect number; the Cubs are totally winning the World Series this time. He's actually assuring it.

"I think we're going to win the World Series, I really do. I wouldn't come here and worked as hard as I did, and everyone worked as hard as they did, to not believe that. I think it's funny when people make predictions or they say things and people are like, 'Oh, how can you say that? You believe it. You really do. Enough of all the b.s., and the curse this, the curse that, the goat, the black cat, or the 100 years (without a championship). ... Whatever it is, we're a better team than we were last year, I truly believe."

Everyone pause, as Cubs fans from across this great nation slit their collective wrists ... and we Cardinals fans just chuckle, the way you chuckle at a small child who can't figure out how to use that yo-yo but won't stop trying.

Try not to take him too seriously, Cubs fans: In addition to predicting the Cubs winning ... the ... sorry, we just couldn't finish that sentence ... anyway, in addition to that, Dempster is the guy who points out that he, in fact, a ninja.

Breaking News: Dempster Dooms 2008 Cubs [Chicago Bull]
We Think Ninjas Would Make Great Closers, Actually [Deadspin]