The Florida Marlins Are Looking For Fat Dudes

We know the Florida Marlins have had considerably difficulties over the last, oh, forever, bringing in scores of fans to Dolphin Stadium, or Pro Player, or La Birdcage, whatever they're calling it these days. Finally, they've stumbled across the only marketing gimmick they hadn't tried: Fat guys!

This Sunday, the Marlins are hosting tryouts for the Marlins Manatee dance team.

The Florida Marlins are looking for big bellies with the biggest jiggle, big feet with the best dance moves and enthusiasm that will rock Marlins fans out of their seats. Auditions will be held to find a few big men for the Marlins Manatees, the first-ever dance/energy squad in Major League Baseball.

It's 1 p.m. at Dolphin Stadium this Sunday. "Be prepared to learn a choreographed routine." We pity the poor intern in charge of judging this competition.