What to watch after a man in a gorilla suit steals your pants ...
• Horse racing: Preakness post position draw, at Baltimore (5 p.m., ET). Do not bother me for the next two hours! [ESPN2]
• MLB: Atlanta at Philadelphia (7 p.m., ET). Bring me the head of the Phillie Phanatic. [ESPN]
• NBA: Eastern Conference semifinals, Game 5, Cleveland at Boston (8 p.m., ET); Western Conference semifinals, Game 5, Utah at Los Angeles Lakers (10:30 p.m., ET). This had better not interfere with Saving Grace. [TNT]
• NHL: Western Conference finals, Game 4, Detroit at Dallas (8 p.m., ET). An unhealthy obsession with Derek Meech? Please. What do doctors know? [Versus]

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