• That is a sweaty, sweaty man: I'm not sure if this is a wedding or a Chippendale's show, but either way ... David Garrard ... I want to party with you, cowboy. [Brahsome]

• Let's talk about the Sabres, though: Toronto to the NFL: Um ... we'll stick with the Argonauts, thanks. [Food Court Lunch]

• Needs more Facebook: ESPN's new website design is in beta, but then again, aren't we all? [Small White Ball]

• Great, more competitors: Santonio Holmes is blogging now? Is that because of too much pot, or not enough? [Yardbarker]

• What did you expect to happen?: You know, when you're trying to defend a player who cries on the bench, it's really tough to get around the fact that everyone calls him Baby. [Boston Herald + You Been Blinded]

Send an email to Dashiell Bennett, the author of this post, at dashiell@deadspin.com.