Raul Ibanez Has A Few Things To Get Off His Chest

The 37-year-old Phillies left fielder, who's having a remarkable Ted Williams-like season, has discovered his success will bring out the skeptics and the awful PED rumor-mongering. He addressed those non-believers who question his body's legitimacy.

So Raul — Mr. Ibanez -do you feel like your career year is being unfairly scrutinized by the media because of the PED era?

"Unfortunately, I understand the environment we're in and the events that have led us to this era of speculation,"

Yeah, it's unfair. It's, like, you see a guy with a nice car one day even though he had a crappy car the day before you begin to think, 'Hey, how'd he manage to afford to buy a brand new car in one day?' He probably stole it, right?

"At the same time, you can't just walk down the street and accuse somebody of being a thief because they didn't have a nice car yesterday and they do today. You can't say that guy is a thief."

Well, I would, but that's just me. I have little faith in humanity. Or pets. If I had a dog, I wouldn't trust that either. I'm dead inside. Anyway, would you ever let me drink your pee just to be sure?

"You can have my urine, my hair, my blood, my stool - anything you can test. I'll give you back every dime I've ever made if the test is positive"

Well, that would require me to purchase a very expensive blender to make that concoction, but I appreciate the offer. Who do you think is coming up with these wild accusations? And would you put your supposed cleanliness up against, oh, I don't know some of my media colleagues $35k per job to prove your innocence?

"I'll put that up against the jobs of anyone who writes this stuff. Make them accountable..."

Yes, I agree with that and I'm sorry some of it has...

"There should be more credibility than some 42-year-old blogger typing in his mother's basement. It demeans everything you've done with one stroke of the pen."

Hey, hey, hey...now just wait a minute there, Raul. I have never EVER used a pen. Now take that back or I'm walking out of this interview...

"It's unfair because this story should be about how hard work, determination, and desire trumps chemicals and shortcuts."

Right. What about desire, character, and work ethic? Huh? You don't have to use a pen to be successful.

"That should be the message: desire, character, work ethic"

Yeah, I agree. Anyone who decides otherwise is just a coward and should be held accountable for their pen accusations. It's not fair.

"But some guy who doesn't know me - one idiot - says something like this. They should be held accountable. It's cowardly."

Now you're speaking my language! I always wanted to ask you, by the way, is your family related to the Ibanez guitar company at all? Can you get Joe Satriani tickets anytime you want. Raul?

I'm Clean, Angry Ibanez Says [Philly.com]