Good Samaritan Gives Tom Brady His Much Needed $4,000

After hearing about the plight of an ex-con, panhandling to re-pay $4,000 to the Patriots' quarterback, a kind businessman has volunteered to pay the debt on his behalf—keeping Tom Brady blissfully unaware that anything has gone wrong.

I'd say there's a 98% chance Tom Brady has never even heard the name "Dennis Paiva." He's an aging former convict, who scavenges garbage for a living and inadvertently stole two metal flower planters from Brady's trash pile. He sold them for $450 dollars, even though they were worth more than $8,000 and they weren't actually thrown in the trash. He plead guilty to larceny and was ordered to pay $4,000 in restitution, which he naturally didn't have, so he was panhandling on the street to raise the money, because Tom Brady is a dick.

So it became a big scandal that a multi-millionaire athlete would turn out a destitute old man—and probably throw footballs at his head while the pathetic codger begs for loose change in the street. However, I'd say there's an even better chance that Tom Brady is not even aware that he's the owner of $8,000 stainless steel flower pots (does he look like the gardening type?) or that Dan Greenwald, owner of a Burlington ad agency, just wrote him a check to clear up the matter.

Tom Brady makes babies with supermodels. He will not be consumed by your trifles.

Stranger pays man's debt to Tom Brady [My Fox Boston]
Earlier: Tom Brady Has No Pity For Panhandling Fools [Deadspin]

Send an email to Dashiell Bennett, the author of this post, at dashiell@deadspin.com.

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