The PGA gas scandal has taught us a lot about ourselves and about humanity in general, but there is one deeper unexplored question: Why is this the first we're learning about Tiger Woods' obsession with farts?
Since publishing this shocking exposé, reports have been flooding in about Woods, David Feherty and their mutual love of poopy humor. Apparently, it's well known in the inner circles of the golf world that these two jokesters love their beefeaters. It's the bond that has sealed their friendship. But how they have managed to hide it from the public until now? A tipster writes:
Someone I know worked in the golf industry for many years, and when I sent him the story he replied with this:
"I must admit that as soon as I read about the fartgate, I suspected Feherty would be up to his ass in it somehow. I knew they joked about farts (Feherty is fascinated by all bodily functions, it seems, but gas especially), and has written about Tiger's farting ability. Seems he may be world-class in that, as well."
So there you have it. The sordid underbelly of golf farts.
Randy Youngman of the Orange County Register concurs:
A few years ago, I interviewed Feherty before the Toshiba Classic at Newport Beach Country Club, and he confessed that he, Woods and Tiger's caddie, Steve Williams, sometimes have off-camera farting contests during tournaments
The man has 14 majors. We know about his wife, his kids, his dad, his dogs, his favorite foods, what kind of putter he used when he was six, why he always wears red on Sunday, and his favorite toppings on tacos. But only now are we learning that he is also the owner of the Green Windbreaker?
David Feherty has done his best to compete with the living legend, but like so many golfers have done before when facing Tiger head-to-head, he's crumbled under the pressure. If fact, there was apparently one particular back nine collapse worthy of Greg Norman at Augusta:
Seconds before Feherty was about to interview Woods after a round, the broadcaster thought he would be funny and – and, uh, his strategy backfired.
"I (soiled) myself," Feherty said.
And then the camera lights came on.
Shit, man, that sucks.
Breaking wind with Tiger Woods [OC Register]