We here at Deadspin prefer it when athletes commit their assaults on the playing field. It means we get to see it all on video.
Offerman, who doesn't get the MLB tag because he's been out of the big leagues since 2005, has nonetheless managed to stay on our radar due to his anger management issues. You'll recall when he charged the mound, bat in hand, and got a police record for his trouble. According to Wikipedia, the court found he was "not likely to offend again in the future." Whoops.