The First Super Bowl XLIV Wardrobe Malfunction Belongs To...ESPN's Merril Hoge?

Yes. There he is in all this thong-wearing glory at one of those ubiquitous pseudo-celebrity beach football games you'll find throughout SB week. This one just happened to be televised and showed us that, disturbingly, Hoge digs kinky Under Armour®.

Vince Young must have had something to do with this.

(H/T reader Bridget who is desperately trying to un-see this image.)