In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the Monday Night Football production crew, which broke out the party font because an aging hornball reached a meaningless round-number milestone.
Isn't the whole thing just gorgeous? Note the moisture on the screen, as if America's televisions were weeping. Note how that "500th" glows, as if lit from above by a beam of God's own sunshine. Oh, and the font — an office birthday party of a font. A "Bob from accounting's retiring, let's celebrate with a meat tray in the conference room" of a font. Achievement, the font says. Glory, it says. There should be winged cherubs peeking through the zeroes and horn music playing in the distance and maybe some fun clip art of a party hat. The chyron bespeaks a lower sort of grandeur, and the overall effect is like finding "ESPN ♥ Brett Favre 4 ever" written in the finest calligraphy on a new Trapper Keeper. Kudos to whoever put this big silly thing on the screen. Some folks send the object of their affection a grainy photo of their wang. ESPN does this instead.
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