The Spoiler is feeling all emotional this Monday, but as we're unable to find our copy of The Notebook, we've decided to reminisce about players and managers, past and present, who've shed salty tears of despair over The Beautiful Game.
Here are a few of our favourite modern men who aren't afraid to show their emotions…
In case you've had your head in the clouds for the past day or haven't bothered to look at the story below, the reason for this list is that Ronaldo's spiritual heir, Nani, had a weep yesterday. Ronaldo also loves a good eye-leak and here's a mash-up of some teary moments made with a disturbing amount of glee by someone or thing. Apparently, "The touch moment is coming" — us neither.
He cries when England get knocked out of ANYTHING because he just cares so bloody much. He also sheds gallons when he misses penalties. However, these are none of your fancy-foreign tears tinged with Garlic and ennui, these are real English tears of pride and passion. The type of real English tears a skinhead sheds while bellowing out the national anthem and battering a bus stop for looking at him the wrong way.
Jose Mourinho and Marco Materazzi
This is the sort of stuff that writers of homoerotic fan fiction can take and really run with. Two proper men, one known as "The Butcher" and the other as "The Special One" hold each other tightly, cry into each other's arms and whisper sweet nothings into their ears… Beautiful.
Rio Ferdinand (and the rest of the England team)
There's nothing certain in this life apart from death and taxis or something. Oh, and that every time England get knocked out of a tournament the players go and have a good blubber. This one was especially tear-jerking because this was the Golden Generation, the ones who were meant to do it all, but came up short because of Wayne Rooney's sending-off and their inability to score in a penalty.
Gazza done the crying thing. Lineker did that pointy thing and England did that losing to Germany on penalties thing. Not a lot else to say about this one, like.
This post, written by Richard Anderson, is republished with permission from The Spoiler. Go there often if you like soccer stuff.