Your morning roundup for April 18, the day a famous surgeon resigned for suggesting that unprotected sex was "a better gift for [Valentine's] day than chocolates."

• The Rangers broke open a tie game with just under two minutes to playagainst the Capitals last night, and won, 3-2. And in the first period, Sean Avery broke his stick — earning a crucial 30 seconds of rest for all of the players on the ice. Sean Avery: not just a fashion icon. Washington leads the series, 2-1. [H/T Zachary]

• In not-hockey news: good God, the first round of the NBA playoffs has been perfect, hasn't it? Derrick Rose went for 39 points in a come-from-behind win over the Pacers, the Heat looked vulnerable against the Sixers, Dwight Howard scored about half the Magic's points and they still lost to the Hawks, Manu face-palmed from the sideline as the Spurs lost to the Grizzlies, Kobe and the Lakers got laid out, the Knicks let Ray Allen take a three for the win, and the Thunder-Nuggets series is, well, the perfect first-round battle. The last five and a half months of mediocrity was just totally worth it.

• Erik Malinowski, sports editor at Wired, takes on the NBA's "data-driven revolution."

• Justin Verlander threw a pitch at Oakland's David DeJesus last night. A's manager Bob Geren said the play was "the strangest thing he had ever seen" in a game. We would so love to conveniently include the video in this post for your viewing pleasure, but we all know what will happen then. So go check it out on the official website of the Detroit Tigers.

• The Boston Red Sox are on their first win-streak of the season: Two straight!

• Cheyenne Woods, niece of Tiger and a junior on the Wake Forest golf team, won the ACC women's individual title over the weekend. Tiger is "so proud of her." Cheyenne is so going to get a better Nike deal than him.

• Watch your highlights from El Clasico; or, Barcelona-Real Madrid, which you could be excused for missing this weekend. There were a few other games on.

• Three major online poker companies were indicted Friday for "bank fraud and money laundering." Sounds like a Bad Beat.

• Jimmie Johnson beat Clint Bowyer by 0.002 seconds in Talladega on Sunday — tied for the closest margin of victory in NASCAR Sprint Cup history. Here's an actual line from ESPN's article: "The finish overshadowed the mundane riding-around that came before it." Hey, we didn't say it.

• Michael Phelps looks unnatural in a pool. LOL Michael Phelps.

Recently On Deadspin

A few stories you might've missed this weekend.

Sean Avery Leaning On His Own Stick Until It Breaks Is Probably A Metaphor For SomethingS

Youth In Revolt: A child found a way to make an Indians-Orioles game interesting: his dad's beer.

Sean Avery Leaning On His Own Stick Until It Breaks Is Probably A Metaphor For Something

Charity: The USC Song Girls jump into a pool for a good cause.

Sean Avery Leaning On His Own Stick Until It Breaks Is Probably A Metaphor For Something

He's Back: Colin Cowherd takes to Twitter to brag about his sitcom; we take the opportunity to remind you that he is awful.

Inked: A big Oklahoma City fan gets "Thunder" tattooed on her thigh.