If you’ve ever been on a vacation at a tropical resort, you’ve seen a Vacation Dad. He’s the guy who is sitting alone at the poolside bar, a little buzzed, smoking his annual cigar—he was sent to the bar by his wife who didn’t want him smoking that crap around her—really enjoying the music, and eagerly chatting up anyone who makes eye contact with him. I am happy to inform you that LeBron James is a Vacation Dad.

He’s right about Michael Jackson, too.