Old Man Bartolo Colón Pitched A Complete Game In 2017

Ancient baseball man Bartolo Colón started the 2017 baseball season with the Atlanta Braves, where he accrued a nightmarish 8.14 ERA in 10 starts before being released on July 4. It looked like the end for the beloved 44-year-old blobfish, even after an offseason spent toning his, umm, frame like a true champion.

Minnesota took a flier on Colón on July 7, and he’s made four starts for the Twins since, with a much more workable (but still not real great) 5.18 ERA over 24 innings of work. Last night he took the mound against the Texas Rangers and looked, for one night, like his old, less-old self, surviving a rough first inning to scatter nine hits and a walk and earn himself a complete game. In the doing, he became the oldest pitcher to record a complete game win since oldest-man Jamie Moyer did it in 2010, at the hysterically old baseball age of 47. It was Colon’s 37th career complete game.

For his effort, he was rewarded with the Gatorade shower:

Old baseball men are the best baseball men.