Deadspin
If you're Major League Baseball, you have a veritable cornucopia of options of whom you should choose to serve as your postseason spokesperson. You could use Tommy Lasorda, like last year, though there's always the dangerous possibility he could ask Joe Buck to show off his swirly move. You could use old standby Scott Stapp. (We're sure he's available!) You could even take a page from the NBA and dial up David Blaine, if he isn't busy tending to his giraffes or something.
But MLB decided to go a different direction.
The July date will mark the earliest launch ever for a postseason MLB campaign. The campaign, entitled "There's Only One October," and featuring actor/comedian Dane Cook will highlight some of baseball's memorable postseason moments, while showcasing today's teams and most promising players in their quest for October greatness. The TV spots will provide a timely narrative of key stories which unfold during the regular season and their impact on shaping the 2007 postseason.
Yep, you're gonna have postseason commercials at the All-Star Game featuring Dane Cook. Cook's Web site right now signs off as "D to the C." Ugh. (Here's the definitive Cook takedown piece.) If there were ever a time for Red Sox fans around here to be embarrassed, this is probably it.
MLB Postseason Marketing With Dane Cook [MLB.com]
Comments
It's refreshing to know that if baseball ever declines in quality, they can compensate for it by just being louder.
Major League Baseball: Trying really hard to make its most die hard fans hate it since 1995.
What the fuck is with the Superman shirts this summer? Seriously. Did the shipment of movie shirts arrive a year too late from China? Time Warner, I'm watching you.
He's a Red Sox fan? It all makes sense now.
I think I saw Louis C.K. wear that shirt first.
What, Carlos Mencia wasn't available?
That ringing sound you hear is the death knell for Major League Baseball.
Major League Baseball
1876-2007
RIP
It takes real effort to out douche Scott Stapp.
Well done MLB, well done.
This is the same ad campaign the NFL used with Louis CK.
@Sean Salisbury Steak: I think Joe Rogan has one too.
"What do you mean Ben Affleck isn't available? Career resurgance? Directing? Well, nothing speaks to baseball fans like douchey New Englanders, so who else is available?"
This is cross-promotion. He does want to name his kid Optimus Prime, after all.
Yuck.
Wow....all kinds of previously-believed-to-be-unbreakable milestones are falling like flies this year:
Home Run Record - Barry Bonds
350+ Wins in the Steroid Era - Roger Clemens
Red Sox Fan More Embarrassing than Ben Affleck - Dane Cook
...featuring "actor"/"comedian" Dane Cook...
Fixed.
Ugh. Dane Cook is the Creed of comedy.
Alice has really let herself go.
Nice. Get the epitome of the word "Masshole" to make us hate the more obnoxious component of Red Sox fandom all over again. Hell, this might even make Red Sox Nation hate itself.
@Sean Salisbury Steak: +1
Dane Cook blows goats. I have proof.
Was there someone higher on the "unthreatening white male vaguely appealing to younger baseball fans without putting out old white men that buy suites" list? I'm drawing a blank. Carson Daly's dead, right?
Next thing you know MLB will have Alyssa Milano - better known as the chick you really, really likes pitchers - designing clothes for them or something. Wait, what? Oh.
not good mlb, not good. yet, dane cook still slightly better than david blaine.
U to the U signing out.
@Suss--: well put
They would be much better served if they had Stephen Lynch make up some songs or something.
Cook speaks in first-person plural? What kind of douchebag would do that.
@Tuffy: Oh, and MLB can't afford Clooney. Besides him, I mean.
@twoeightnine: He's a Red Sox fan that even Simmons hates. Some story about him showing up in a Yankee hat when they were recording a Crank Yankers episode. But its probably really because Cook tried to sell Simmons on the merits of The Next Karate Kid or some other pop culture phenomenon Simmons finds sacrosanct.
I guess MLB just wanted to get the drop on the NFL's playoff ads coming out next week with Scott Cortese in them.
"Reggie Jackson agrees that Reggie Jackson is the One True October. Reggie Jackson's attorneys will now work on behalf of Reggie Jackson in correcting the egregious copyright infringement on Reggie Jackson's trademark."
Sincerely,
Reggie Jackson
@44 in a Row: Nope, neither was Yogi Berra.
In a related move, The NHL has announced that Carrot Top will be used in ads to promote the upcoming NHL season.
What a schmendrick
I think MLB is up for a Clio in the category of Marketing Douchebaggery.
@Senators Lost Cojones:
Hey, could I see that envelope for a moment? I've got this letter from Rickey Henderson's lawyers to pass along...
Oh for the love of god... first Drew Barrymore/Generic SNL guy, and now this?
WHHYYYY!!!! Whyyyy Dane Cook, whyyyy!!!!
Sincerely,
Red Sox fans
On the bright side for all non-Sox fans, this pretty much guarantees another Sox choke this fall so we can listen to Dane cry like a little bitch.
The "Most Boston Fans Are Tools and Even Though I'm a Boston Fan I Hate Most of Them, and _____ is another example of that" angle is one of the most overplayed here in the comments.
That being said, most Boston fans are tools and even though I'm a Boston fan I hate most of them, and Dane Fucking Cook is another example of that.
Dane Cook:asshole :: Ben Affleck:Oscar-Winning asshole
@ArmansCopyOfSwank: It's all part of MLB's master plan to have everyone outside of Massachusetts loathe the Red Sox by 2010.
I bleed if you shoot me in the chest plate.
Prove it fucker. I hate this man so much.
@UkraineNotWeak: Sorry, but Bettman already has an exclusive rights deal with Jeremy Hotz.
Another washed-up comic yah-dood. Fuckin sweet.
It was '03 at Oneonta State College.
Cook was doing the college circuit.
While driving downtown to the bar from campus with some friends, we let out an unforgettable tirade in the direction of the throngs of white sneakered students entering the field house.
Since then, I haven't really felt the need to bash him.
They say that Dane Cook enjoys that physical comedy stuff. Time to hit him with a bus.
Look, there's that guy - the asshole in the Red Sox hast.
@UkraineNotWeak: I would love that. Can you imagine his takes on t"the 5-hole" or the hitting a shot glass with his open hand (slap-shot)? That would be like a thousand times more gooder.
Jesus, could they find ONE famous person who's a Red Sox fan that I don't want to stab in the eyes???
Christ.
Dane Cook leading the world in being unfunny since Jimmy Fallon fell off the Earth.
Ahh finaly a reason us Yankee Fans can mock the SAWX fans about this season (until a miracle comeback a la 1978)
tough day for red sox fans here at deadspin.
@Camp Tiger Claw: +1
@Slothrop: Doesn't he do that anyway, regardless of baseball?
Joe Rogan has video proof that this is a rip-off of a Major League Lacrosse promotion
"Actor/comedian Dane Cook?"
That's like calling me industrialist/billionaire Precious Roy.