This is the most post ever

This is the most well-written post in Deadspin history. Bravo.

Was he in the Mitchell Report?

This seals it, I am totally headed down to the Coliseum over break.

I know I'm drunk, but is it really 2pm on Saturday, when it says Skeets posted this? It's dark out. What's happening? I can't feel my face. Help me.

My God, that thing is going to eat me while I sleep.

Ahh yes, the Fort Wayne Mad Antz, named after General "Mad" Anthony Wayne, the NBDL team shared by the Pacers and Pistons. I am surprised there has not already been several intra team brawls.

Is this post really here, or am I hallucinating it?

@44 in a Row: I picked the wrong week to stop sniffing glue

Seriously. What's happening here?

@Len Bias Cocaine Surplus: I think it's more that the team execs picked the wrong week to start.

@44 in a Row: Thank God I'm not alone.

Commence nightmares.

I will have nightmares, but I am amped for 2 pm.

This is either the best promotional ad or the worst sleep aid ever.

I fall asleep for 15 minutes and I wake up to this image on my screen. I won't be sleeping the rest of this weekend.

This kind of reminds me of prom...don't ask....

Here's my current concern. Is it going to crush the basketball in a show of strength, or throw it through the screen towards my head as hard as it can?

I, for one, welcome our new ant overlords.

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOPS!

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOPS!

As in, "Wooops, I posted this too early"? Or, "Wooops, this is fucking terrifying and I should never have subjected these guys to it"?

I'm sorry I got drunk off of absinthe, it'll never happen again. Now please make the devil go away.

This ANT is taking over Deadspin!!! I can't even delete it!

NIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIBLES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

@BabyGorilla: I actually am going to ask.

@pr0ff3ss0r_j3rkwh3at: This seems to be an ant tyrany

@44 in a Row: Skeets has put the fear of God into us.

@J.E. Skeets: Maybe the ant is actually our new overlord.

GET AWAY FROM ME, CREEPY DEADSPIN ANT!

@Len Bias Cocaine Surplus: Very possible.

Hopefully at halftime they make the ant and Cheikh Samb fight.

Never leave a Canadian in charge of anything!!!!!

The ant is actually our new weekend editor. And weekday editor. And Sportshuman of the Year.

OK, I can't get rid of it. So it looks like the ant stays. Good luck trying to sleep tonight ...

@J.E. Skeets: See what you get for trying to be proactive in your work?

@PQ Crash: So true. Though this post is really starting to grow on me.

@J.E. Skeets: Then it would only be appropriate to make this the DU!AN thread. So the ant doesn't get us. Strength in numbers, lads.

@44 in a Row: Will has been found dead with many small bites found in him.

EASIEST MONEY I'VE EVER MADE. Good night, DUAN. Good night, ant.

As I always suspected, all of the best pick-up players hang out at Mos Eisley Cantina.

Isiah has offered Nightmare Ant a 6 year $69 million contract to play the 2 for the Knicks.

I get the feeling that the photos of Nightmare Ant and Roger Clemens tell a bigger story.

Whoa, I picked the wrong site to visit after coming back from the bar. I'm fucked up beyond repair (this is probably gonna take me over 5 minutes to type) and I'm ...not sure where i'm going with this so happy Saturday everyone. see you in 12 hours.

HAIL ANTS

Who else is pumped for Mike Greenberg's ABC game show, Duel ? I KNOW I AM!

WRHATTH THE FHHUCK IS THATHIS?!? NIGHTMARE FUEL IS SAYS TAG!
I can't go to sleep what that that someone Raid it! No no I said RAID Mr. Clemens. Anyone here?!?

FUNNY LINDSAY LOHAN PICS! Save Us and Our Dreams!!!

@EnVague: Kent Brockman?

@Coming Into The Game, The Superstar Receiver, Of Your Upper Deck Torontooo BJsss: @Coming Into The Game, The Superstar Receiver, Of Your Upper Deck Torontooo BJsss: FOLLOW ME, FOLLOW ME TO FREEDOM!

This is certainly an interesting development...

I'd hit it.

@She Blinded Me With Violence: With a sack full of doorknobs?

Ugh, I can't even pass out drunk to do that pic.

*due to that pic

@She Blinded Me With Violence: I'd hit anything with a hole at this point.

@ Nightmare Ant: You killed Nibbles, you bastard!

@TattooedMess(iah): Nah, talkin' 'bout the ant. With a shovel.

@She Blinded Me With Violence: That may have been a lie.

Sussypants- if you're going to break the thread, post tetris again.

OK, so I'm getting dru