Deadspin
A reader named "Al" sends in the above picture, and the following story, after the jump.
I just had my first Wrigley bleacher experience after being a lifelong Cubs fan who grew up in Hawaii. I had three buddies in town from back home, and for a bunch of first timers at Wrigley, the bleacher experience was just awesome. Ryan Dempster was warming up with some long toss in front of us on the field, and my trash talking buddy starts it up with him with the standard, "Dempster, you're killing my fantasy team" routine. Dempster was having none of it, stops the long toss, looks up to the bleachers and shouts back, "What are you talking about man? I got myself on my own fantasy team and I'm doing pretty good this year." A bit startled that a professional baseball player would actually respond to the taunt, someone in the bleachers shouts back "Oh yeah....so what's your fantasy team name?" Dempster, looking to get back to his long tossing, "The Taints, man. The Taints".
The entire bleacher section cracked up. What was really funny was what came next, when Christine (the lady in the picture) asked Dempster for the ball he was long tossing with. After she first asked, his response was something along the lines of "what am I going to long toss with if I give you this ball?" After Christine pleaded for the ball again (in that semi-annoying way only girls can pull off), Dempster responded back "I'll give you the ball if you take your top off." By now the entire bleacher section was rolling over itself, a few beers deep and chanting "Take it off" in support of Dempster's response. Christine, now embarrassed said that her boyfriend was her and that he wouldn't like that, or something to that effect. Dempster, in an act of kindness and to stop the crowd from chanting at this poor girl to take off her clothes, then gave Christine the ball and went about his warming up business.
A bit later on, a bunch of bullpen players are walking by the bleachers and people are throwing down items to them to get their autographs. Christine, now relishing her role as "that girl" in the stands, goes and gets Dempster to sign the ball he gave her. He throws it back up, and this is when the magical picture was taken. I thought it worthwhile for you to send over in case you guys wanted to post it, especially because it's the least I could do to try and rally the Cubs from their 0-2 hole against the D-Bags.
Comments
"Rally the Cubs from their 0-2 hole against the D-bags."
So the Cubs are playing against themselves this series?
To Ryan,
Take off your uniform.
...now leave.
Signed,
Everyone who's ever owned the Dumpster in a fantasy league.
Just kidding, they're down two games to none. They're only playing with themselves.
Yes
... I'm still waiting for the topless photos...
The Cubs are in the playoffs. Go Cubs!
Yet another situation in which Ryan Demspter failed to close the deal.
That's how we roll up here.
This is just like To Catch a Predator...
there's a reason they call them "equalizers".
that being said, still a yes.
Dempster is the guy who went to a Blackhawks game in a Captain American costume.
Her kids are gonna be really excited to show that ball off to their friends in 15 years.
I'd drink it, I'd hit it, I'd hit it
So that explains so much of his terrible pitching down the stretch... he's thinking too much of Christine's tits!
Dear Deadspin, I never thought it'd happen to me...
He's lying. His fantasy team is named the Cum Dempsters.
That chick is such a cocktease. I hate it when a "Take it off!" chant gets wasted.
To Deadspin,
Post this damn post on,
J~~~23 J~~~___.
reminds me of a game I went to last year. Jacque Jones had a wedgie in the top of the 8th and was trying to do everything possible to get it out without actually pulling it out with his hand. He was doing the wedgie-dance full out.
Anyways, he finally succumbs and pulls it out manually, and my buddy yells out "Fuck yeah, Jacque, pick that butt". The bleachers erupt in laughter and Jacque turns around and starts laughing a bit too, clearly embarrassed.
Wrigley bleachers are a unique experience and worth it for anynoe who loves baseball.
With her, you get to third base on the first date.
The chant was actually directed at Mark Prior's arm.
magical picture? It's a fucking ball signed by Ryan Dempster, held by a chick whose tits we didn't get to see. Great...
@Civil Negligence: Here you go.
If Dempster had done that at the Cell, he probably would have been shot by an over zealous boyfriend driving a dented Trans Am.
@Unsilent Majority: You mean he just take off his clothes, right?
(And I am pretty sure that he's known as hound dog.)
Funniest thing is that girl was supposed to be in gym class.
She's no Dick Stockton.
Prank War 7
Chicago people - You're letting us down. Still not a single Trixie joke in the comments.
If she takes off her top we can see breasts! Go breasts!
--Breastfan240315
A wedgie pick? He ain't got nothing Germany's national team coach: [www.theoffside.com]
@Dead Air ummm Dead Air:
"Now 'SplitFingerBanger69', also known as Ryan Dempster of the Chicago Cubs, has just pulled up in front of our decoy's home...right on time. Just yesterday, he had a lurid exchange with our decoy online:
SplitFingerBanger69: i could use my changeup grip on u? wood you like that?
Man, this was NOTHING like my first time in the Wrigley bleachers. Damn.
We got Adam Dunn to flip us off before, but apparently this isn't an isolated incident either.
I call bullshit on this story. I refuse to believe that anyone has Ryan Dempster on their fantasy team.
That's amazing. This has never happened to me before.*
*Actually, yes, it has.
If he could only pitch with the precision he shows in his penmanship then maybe he wouldn't suck rhinoceros balls.
especially because it's the least I could do to try and rally the Cubs from their 0-2 hole against the D-Bags.
The Cubs are playing the Red Sox?
"Show yer box" > "Take it off"
Someone should tell Dempster he's going to get himself banned if he keeps talking about his fantasy team.
@SteveJeltzFan: +1
I had Cum Dempster in my fantasy league and I did fine in saves, ERA and WHIP. Of course it helped that I also had Paps and Saito.
If this happened in Baseball Hell (Tampa Bay):
Elijah Dukes: "Take it off or I'll shoot ya, bitch."
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