Deadspin
Sean Salisbury briefly disappeared from the ESPN airwaves earlier this year. Pro Football Talk noted that Salisbury had been suspended (scroll way down), but the Worldwide Leader gave no reasons for his absence, in fact, they never mentioned it at all. And on December 27th in a column at CBS SportsLine, Mike Freeman gives a "media entry" for his "All-Selfish" team:
The NFL analyst who shall not be named that took a picture of his penis with a cell phone camera and has shown it to numerous, uncomfortable women, then was suspended by his network for it. Absolute true story. Please make sure to clean off the mirror when you are done with it.And The Big Lead learned this morning that the analyst in question was ESPN's Sean Salisbury.
First of all, you can relax, because I don't have the photo. Also, thank God it was Salisbury and not Berman, because those "You're With Me, Leather" t-shirts might have had to look completely different. And I doubt that they'd have sold very well.
I'm also wondering what Harold Reynolds could have done that was much worse than this. What did Reynolds do, run around showing people pictures of Peter Gammons' junk?
TBL Investigation: That was Easy. We Found that Perverted NFL Analyst That Was Suspended [The Big Lead]
Guess the Suspended, Perverted NFL Analyst [The Big Lead]
Pro Football Talk Rumor Mill [ProFootballTalk.com]
Take a look at this year's All-Selfish team [CBS Sportsline]
Comments
And the prohibitive favorite for SHOTY II has emerged.
The cell phone cock pictures is becoming a little too familiar of a tag around here for my comfort.
The NFL analyst who shall not be named that took a picture of his penis with a cell phone camera and has shown it to numerous, uncomfortable women
I guess he was trying to make John Clayton jealous.
let he who is without sin cast the first stone.
Might try that move at the bar tonight. I'll report back tomorrow and let you know how it goes.
I was really, really hoping that I would never have anything to add to the football-play-cell-phone-dong-photo thread BUT...
The star of "The Longest Yard" redux was, in fact, spotted offering a Salisbury Cell Phone Schlong Retrospective to female patrons of the Old Shillelagh in Greektown, Detroit, the week preceeding Super Bowl XL.
If football player cell phone dick shots are outlawed, then only outlaws will have football player cell phone dick shots. Or something.
Sean Salisbury is a fuckin douchebag.
The end.
He's not a punter I thought only punters could do stuff like that.
"Ask me about my weinerrrrrr!"
The sad thing is that this guy had the opportunity to be Matt Leinart's QB coach.
I heard that Golic tried this once, but after Greenberg took him up on the offer, he no longer needed to continue doing it.
ok, just so i am clear on this...
Salisbury shows cellphone pics of his cock to female employees, and gets suspended...
my man HR gives a broad a hug and he gets canned??!?!?!?
i call bullshit. we not getting the full story on HR.
oh, and are we all in agreement that salisbury and jeff reed compare cell phone cock pics?
I expected way more professionalism from a one-time Battlebots analyst.
Watch your back, Merrill Hoge.
Why is that "selfish," Mike Freeman? If anything, it's a form of sharing.
Man am I glad I skipped the Old Shillelagh last year. Sean Salisbury's weiner seems the kind of stuff that would give me nightmares WELL into 2010...
Well at least SOMEBODY was using ESPN Mobile.
Back when this douche was just an ex-backup-QB in San Diego, he tried to pick up this girl I was dating, by regaling her with tales of clipboard holding . . . and showing her pictures of his kids.
Salisbury named his penis "upside"
What a cork soaker.
"See this baby...I can hold up three clipboards with this thing."
salisbury and jeff reed are both in talks with a major porn studio to make a movie. together.
I got to get the female deadspineer perspective on this one just to make sure I'm not going crazy or completely lost my mind since I've been married so long. Mid to late 40's guy with modest amount of notoriety/celebrity/cash walks up to an attractive bright young woman college intern. Said guy is a known married man with kids and commences to lead off with "Hey look who called" and proceeds to show the her the "junk". There really are women go for this. I am afraid for my daughter
I'm fully convinced to be able to work at ESPN you must have some sort of mental or sexual disorder.
Salisbury stole that idea from me ... and I stole the idea from Jeff Reed
Arn: The only thing a stunt like that gets you is a swift kick to the 'nads. Trust me.
However re: your daughter...I'd still be afraid if I were you. Two words. Chris. Berman.
I bet he calls it the Salisbury Steak. I would. I do.
tater29: Do you mean "be an athlete"? That's what I heard.
Also, John Kruk did this so he could see it every once in awhile.
I'm still hoping for an Erin Andrews flash, showing either top or bottoms....its almost ESPN protocol now to do something like that....
Well, no one said that Salisbury showed it to other ESPN employees, so there is no sexual harassment here (unlike HR). There is, however, a sexual assault on the eyes of unfortunate women.
The Day of An Erin Andrews Flash >>>>>> any USC Cheerleader Butt
tater29, it's actually an essential part of their vetting process for new employees.
One, pull your pants down low;
Two, put your dick on the phoooone'
Three, let her open the phone
i love it that the Playmaker is the sanest, most normal person on that network.
BaseballBookshelf wins
"Mid day at the grocery store a dick on a phone"
Winslow:
I was going to offer up Steve Young to undermine your assertion, then I remembered, "Oh yeah. He's a Mormon."
I'm replused... for many reasons.
Why do some men want to show women their junk? Why do they think that we're going like pictures of this? I've had it happen to me a couple of times through the years, and I have NEVER understood why these men love their penises so much, and think we gush at the sight of them?
I've always wondered that whole bag of neurosis was about.
2) It had to have happened at work, unless there is some sort of "you are the image of the company" clause in his contract.
3) Why did it take so long for this story to break? And if it is on his phone, chances are, it is on an email account somewhere. Which means we need to SEE IT RIGHT NOW SO WE CAN ALL LAUGH AT IT!
TSW: Why do men want to show me their penises?
TSW: I have to see Sean Salisbury's penis.
Is the cell phone screen life size?
Can we get it with a ringtone?
I have not shown my junk to anyone who hasn't asked.
But I bet Michael Irvin is laughing his ass off from that story of "sean! of course chicks dig seeing your dick on the phone! trust me man!"
Having been sick all morning, I finally felt well enough to check out Deadspin this afternoon. Thanks a lot MJD, I'm feel sick again.
a dick on a phone
+1
barbaro would never take a cellphone photo of his penis.
his fans, however...
when espn calls themsleves the "worldwide leader", i'm assuming they're referring to sexual perversions, right?
I guess I should take a cell phone pic of my boobs? I really don't understand people who take cell phone pics of their goodies.
It was just one of the perks of ESPN Mobile.
yes you should. i'll email you my number.
It was just one of the perks of ESPN Mobile.
Any jokes about ESPN mobile make me laugh more than I should.
+1 hoi polloi
As part of the terms of his return, ESPN is requiring Salisbury to use a picture of Warren Moon's penis.
Sending pervy email to female SportsCenter staffers...Mike Tirico...3 months off.
Peeing out an open window and directly onto an off-duty cop...Gary Miller...two months off.
Getting an email of metschick's rack...priceless.
And Sean Salisbury wasn't even a kicker.