Deadspin: 2007 shoty

Your SHOTY Winner: Isiah Thomas

Leitch — Fri, 11 Jan 2008 14:20:53 EST

We would like to congratulate Isiah Thomas on his ascendence to the lofty perch of 2007 Deadspin Sportshuman Of The Year.

Isiah's heroic rise from a No. 8 seed was inspiring to anyone whose heart is not cold, withered and dead. He joins the late, great Barbaro as SHOTY winners. Hopefully Isiah survives the title.

Also, a great run for Kige Ramsey, who finished as the runner-up. There's always next year, Kige.

Thanks everyone for voting.

(Graphic by the moonwalking Jim Cooke.)

SHOTY Title Game: Kige Ramsey Vs. Isiah Thomas

Leitch — Mon, 07 Jan 2008 14:20:23 EST

Well, we've come this far, and now it's time to crown a 2007 Sportshuman Of The Year. Fortunately, it didn't take very long.

Voting is open until Thursday night. So you have plenty of time to mull. Our honored finalists.

No. 2 Seed Kige Ramsey
Carried around every book he ever owned in a belt.
Visited Wal-Mart.
Actively did some campaigning.
Expanded his commercial techniques.
Enjoyed Halloween.

No. 8 Seed Isiah Thomas
Don't give a shit about these white people, bitch.
Understands what black people can say, and what white people can't.
Explained sexual harassment to James Dolan.
Got gotten by the bitches.
Successful avoided Stephon Marbury's "dirt."

The vote is in your hands.

SHOTY Final Four: Elijah Dukes Vs. Isiah Thomas

Leitch — Mon, 31 Dec 2007 17:15:19 EST

Because it's New Years Eve, and we're taking tomorrow off, we figured we'd go ahead and let this post ride the rest of the night and all day tomorrow. (At least until we do our "ZOOOOK" post after the Illini shock the world in the Rose Bowl.)

The title matchup will be on Monday, and it looks like Kige Ramsey has himself a slot. But this one should close. Screw Iowa: The polls are already open here.

No. 4 Seed: Elijah Dukes

Explored the possibilities lent to us by cellular technology.
Impregnated a foster child.
Became a sports radio star.
You divorced, dawg.

It's a big week coming up, very busy, so vote tonight and on New Years Day, and we'll be back with a full slate on Wednesday. Be safe out there tonight.

SHOTY Final Four: Kige Ramsey Vs. Pac Man Jones

Leitch — Wed, 26 Dec 2007 14:20:35 EST

This is it, folks: We're at the Final Four. Look out: There's Billy Packer! Bah! Grrr!

Again, a matchup of polar opposite human beings. But, in that Tennessee Titans way, they are teammates. Voting is open for about a week, and we'll occasionally remind.

No. 2 Seed Kige Ramsey
Carried around every book he ever owned in a belt.
Visited Wal-Mart.
Actively did some campaigning.
Expanded his commercial techniques.
Enjoyed Halloween.

No. 3 Seed Pac Man Jones
Introduced the phrase "Make It Rain" to a nation of grateful white people.
Scared his family.
Missed out on watching Vince Young play quarterback this season.
Didn't rassle, darnit.

Get on there and vote, folks.

SHOTY Elite Eight: Pac Man Jones Vs. Sean Salisbury

Leitch — Thu, 20 Dec 2007 15:10:41 EST

As we eye that looming upset, we look at our final Elite Eight matchup.

By the way, the first final four matchup with be posted Wednesday, the day after Christmas — yes, we're working — and the second final four matchup will be posted on New Years Eve. We're working then too.

No. 6 Seed Sean Salisbury
Displayed his photographic skills.
Accidentally said "Jew."
Met The Balls.
Established a Web presence.

So, who makes the Final Four?

SHOTY Elite Eight: Ron Mexico Vs. Isiah Thomas

Leitch — Tue, 18 Dec 2007 14:20:13 EST

In the first round, No. 1 seed Ron Mexico/Michael Vick/Ookie was more wobbly than we might have suspected. He could be ripe for an Elite Eight upset.

So, let's get right to it:

No. 1 Seed Ron Mexico
Suffered some weed-stashing problems.
Appears to have electrocuted puppies.
Fessed up.
Mercifully suspended by the NFL.
Checked into prison.

So, let's see how this turns out.

SHOTY Elite Eight: Kige Ramsey Vs. Brady Quinn

Leitch — Thu, 13 Dec 2007 12:25:41 EST

UPDATE: Poll is now fixed. Sorry about that.
Only in this deranged universe of ours could these two human beings compete against each other in anything. One thing they do have in common: Neither has ever thrown an NFL pass.

Should be a fun one.

No. 2 Seed Kige Ramsey
Carried around every book he ever owned in a belt.
Visited Wal-Mart.
Actively did some campaigning.
Expanded his commercial techniques.
Enjoyed Halloween.

No. 7 Seed: Brady Quinn
Sat in a crowded room, then left.
Grabbed some underage crotch.
Went all dance party marathon on us.
Rocked out.

So, who's on the way to Final Four?

SHOTY Elite Eight: Elijah Dukes Vs. Gilbert Arenas

Leitch — Tue, 11 Dec 2007 14:20:24 EST

At last, we have completed the endless first round of the 2007 Sportshuman Of The Year tournament. It only took a month. Now we're down the nitty-gritty: The Elite Eight.

All seeds held in the first round, which just proves the seeding committee did a good job. (Note: This does not actually prove this.) So the big dawgs are all set for the second round ... and we've got a tough one right off the bat.

No. 4 Seed: Elijah Dukes

Explored the possibilities lent to us by cellular technology.
Impregnated a foster child.
Became a sports radio star.
You divorced, dawg.

No. 5 Seed Gilbert Arenas
Dunked off a trampoline.
Stole a joke.
Helped you with your love life.
Talked to us.

So, who makes the Final Four? Vote, vote like the wind.

SHOTY First Round: Isiah Thomas Vs. Marques Slocum

Leitch — Thu, 06 Dec 2007 15:10:20 EST

We come, AT LAST, to the end of the first round of SHOTY voting. Yes, it's taken a while; just be glad we have 16 competitors, rather than 64. We would have had to start in June.

Nothing has been close so far — though that Vick race was intriguingly close — but this is the 8-9 matchup. And it's two of our favorites; both are probably underseeded. So:

No. 9 Seed Marques Slocum
got a fuck lion now come fuck wit me.

So, vote: We're excited to see the results of this one.

SHOTY First Round: Ron Mexico Vs. Mark Mangino

Leitch — Tue, 04 Dec 2007 14:20:01 EST

Pretty much every first-round SHOTY matchup has been a blowout. And we doubt this No. 1 vs. No. 16 matchup will be much different.

The biggest trouble with this one? Whether to go with Vick, Mexico or Ookie.

No. 1 Seed Ron Mexico
Suffered some weed-stashing problems.
Appears to have electrocuted puppies.
Fessed up.
Mercifully suspended by the NFL.
Checked into prison.

No. 16 Seed Mark Mangino
Fat.

So, make your picks. The final first-round matchup is Thursday.

SHOTY First Round: Pac Man Jones Vs. Norby!

Leitch — Thu, 29 Nov 2007 15:10:03 EST

Every single SHOTY first-round matchup has been a blowout. We are not sure this will be any different; the Deadspin Planet is of one mind these days.

Anyway, here are two people who have probably never sat down together for tea, which is a shame; they might learn they have more in common than they think. Or maybe not.

No. 14 Seed Norby!
Co-authored a rather awesome memo
Has funny name.
"Hey, how are ya? Couple of things ..."

So, who's making it to the next round?

SHOTY First Round: Sean Salisbury Vs. Rick Ankiel

Leitch — Tue, 27 Nov 2007 14:20:25 EST

After almost a week off, the 2007 SHOTY Tournament returns with a matchup of two very different human beings.

All we know is that we're in love with them both.

No. 6 Seed Sean Salisbury
Displayed his photographic skills.
Accidentally said "Jew."
Met The Balls.
Established a Web presence.

No. 11 Seed Rick Ankiel
Returned.
Amazed.
Inspired.
Absolutely nothing else happened whatsoever, nope.

So, vote, kids.

SHOTY First Round: Gilbert Arenas Vs. Steely McBeam

Leitch — Wed, 21 Nov 2007 15:10:25 EST

It's SHOTY frenzy this week; two in two days. You now can spend your Thanksgiving playing around with online polls. Fun!

We haven't had any close races in the SHOTY yet. We'll see how this one goes.

No. 5 Seed Gilbert Arenas
Dunked off a trampoline.
Stole a joke.
Helped you with your love life.
Talked to us.

No. 12 Seed Steely McBeam

Introduced as FABULOUS.
Impersonated a Village Person.

So, who wins?

SHOTY First Round: Kige Ramsey Vs. Joey Chestnut

Leitch — Tue, 20 Nov 2007 14:20:18 EST

Because Thursday is, you know, Thanksgiving, we're gonna have voting both today and tomorrow. It'll put you in the mood for tryptophan.

It's No. 2 seed Kige Ramsey vs. No. 15 seed Joey Chestnut. We think in real life, these guys might be friends.

No. 2 Seed Kige Ramsey
Carried around every book he ever owned in a belt.
Visited Wal-Mart.
Actively did some campaigning.
Expanded his commercial techniques.
Enjoyed Halloween.

No. 15 Seed Joey Chestnut

Became an American hero.

So, get out there and vote!

SHOTY First Round: Brady Quinn Vs. Alex Rodriguez

Leitch — Thu, 15 Nov 2007 13:35:33 EST

The first matchup, on Tuesday, was a blowout. We suspect this one will be a little closer.

It's No. 7 seed Brady Quinn against No. 10 seed Alex Rodriguez. We don't know if these two are friends, but maybe they should be: They probably would have a lot to talk about.

No. 7 Seed: Brady Quinn
Sat in a crowded room, then left.
Grabbed some underage crotch.
Went all dance party marathon on us.
Rocked out.

No. 10 Seed: Alex Rodriguez
"Wrote" a children's book.
Dug deep.
Made friends with "she-male, muscular types."
Opted out while we were occupied with other matters.
Changed his mind. Maybe.

So, who's gonna make the Elite Eight? Vote below.

SHOTY First Round: Elijah Dukes Vs. Jeff Reed

Leitch — Tue, 13 Nov 2007 14:20:51 EST

OK, folks ... it's time for the voting to begin. Let's all give big-up to the genius that is Jim Cooke for his official SHOTY graphic. The 2007 SHOTY voting will run every Tuesday and Thursday until, well, 2008 probably. We love Kige there.

Voting will remain open until the end of the first round ... so let's get started. It's No. 4 seed Elijah Dukes vs. No. 13 Jeff Reed. A look at the nominees:

No. 4 Seed: Elijah Dukes

Explored the possibilities lent to us by cellular technology.
Impregnated a foster child.
Became a sports radio star.
You divorced, dawg.

No. 13 Seed Josh Reed

Revealed some kicker dong.
Partied.
Partied some more.

So, go vote: Who makes it to the Final Eight?