cranky Page index.xml - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The NBA Is Cranky As Hell
We’re smack dab in the middle of post-holidays winter, when all there is to do is be pissed off about the fact that there’s nothing to look forward to in the immediate future other than some dark, cold days. This wears on everybody, but it seems to be wearing on NBA players in particular....
Report: Miserable Old Man Michael Jordan Wants A Private Golf Course
According to a report from Golf.com, Michael Jordan, who has now apparently reached the Old-Man-Potter stage of his life, is considering building his very own golf course in Florida because the country club that he frequents is no longer living up to his standards....
We Are All Dave McKenna
Here is Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder." We'll link to this every day until Snyder's dumbass lawsuit gets thrown out of court....
Read Bill O'Reilly Wax Uptight About '70s Porn Auteur Gerard Damiano
During the early days of disco, young scribe Bill O'Reilly scribed for the Boston Phoenix. His first article was a feature on the director of Deep Throat, giving new resonance to "Fuck it, we'll do it live." [Boston Phoenix]...
Rick Reilly® Writes Column A Lot Like Other Rick Reilly® Column
When he isn't squirting various hypothetical juices in various hypothetical eyes, Rick Reilly® is usually recycling his own material. Yesterday's column finds him complaining about golf's picayune rules. Again....
The Five-Star Columnist Is Unamused By Your Homophobic Taunts
Mike Lupica's ego is to sportswriting what Milton Berle's cock is to comedy. It is an occupational totem, around which colleagues spin fantastical-seeming yarns that just so happen to be true. Here are a few such tales....
Our Man In Boy Clothes Is Not Feeling Generous Today
Mike Lupica's ego is to sportswriting what Milton Berle's cock is to comedy. It is an occupational totem, around which colleagues spin fantastical-seeming yarns that just so happen to be true. Here are a few such tales....
You May Be Taller, But You're Still Beneath Him
Mike Lupica's ego is to sportswriting what Milton Berle's cock is to comedy. It is an occupational totem, around which colleagues spin fantastical-seeming yarns that just so happen to be true. Here are a few such tales....
Joyless Mike Breen Threatens To Make Boring Finals Even More Unbearable
Of the many reasons to feel generally blah about the upcoming Magic-Lakers series, there is, above all, this sad fact: Mike Breen, the only man who watches basketball and cheers for the refs, is still the voice of the NBA finals....
Don Imus Just Can't Quit You
If you prefer your radio hosts with faces like a 90-year-old saddle, then it's time to rejoice: Don Imus is back on the air! Was it really only eight months ago that the infamous "nappy-headed hos" comment about the Rutgers women's basketball team sent the nation into a tither? Well, he's back, on W...
What To Watch
• 12:00 pm — This Week in Baseball [FOX] • 1:00 pm — NBA Access with Ahmad Rashad [ABC] • 1:00 pm — Wyndham Championship (Golf) [CBS] • 2:00 pm — AST Dew Tour: Vans Invitational [NBC] • 3:00 pm — Little League World Series: Mid-Atlantic vs. West [ABC] • 3:00 pm — Ty Murray's Celebrity Bull-Riding Ch...
Those Crazy Kids At Shea Can't Get Along
The Mets won last night, but clearly, something's going wrong with that team, sublimely timed for the Sports Illustrated cover jinx. Over at Nyjer Please, they've got some "inside" info that the team no longer gets along. And the problem seems to be ... Julio Franco?...