It turns out Braun was peddling a tell-all last year about some of her high profile clients and started name-dropping them to one editor. Here's his recap of their conversation:

I met her last year when she was peddling a book. I asked her about her client list and after rattling off the usual suspects—Charlie Sheen, Prince Andrew..—I said "C'mon, surprise me." Then she dropped this: "Would Eli Manning surprise you?" After the peanuts fell out of my mouth, I asked "Any other high profile jocks?", and she smiled "What's it worth to you?"
"Well, it could be worth a book contract if the name is big enough," I replied. But she won't give anybody else up.
Don't you think she would have mentioned Tiger if she was really servicing him in order to secure that book contract? I'm now starting to think that today's story is bullshit and she's so desperate to sell her story that she's jumping on the Tiger slutwagon.

Great point. Unfortunately, leaving Tiger off the list also calls her Eli-outing into question. But more preposterous things have happened. And it's long been suggested that the Manning boys aren't the slack-jawed, wide-eyed innocents we think they are. Take for example these emails I received from an Indianapolis party girl (who knew?!) soon after Tiger's numerous transgressions were being made public. [Sic'd]:

and this is just about the time that tiger wishes peyton manning's mistresseS would come out and tell their stories... his day is coming.. and i bet he is thinking OHHH SHIT right at this moment... :-)

the two people in sports that have the squeaky clean images.. tiger woods and peyton manning.. both of whom are more alike than people realize.. Im just saying.. peytons dirt will come out some day as well.. just like tiger.. people knew about it.. just whispered and it didnt get out till now..

by living in indianapolis and in that crowd... there are whispers all around.. im just surprised it hasnt gotten out yet.. now dont think i am a scorned girl or anything like that.. i could care less.. i mostly blame the women that throw themselves at the athletes.. i had heard of his trysts.. but didnt want to believe it.. wanted to believe what we are shown on tv... then was utterly letdown when i had the unfortunate experience of having to turn the offer down and now knowing all the whispers are true...
just saying.. his day will come to...

Follow you completely.. but just because Tiger may have done it this way.. doesnt mean Peyton follows that script.. Now, I cant speak for what he does on vacations or trips to vegas.. bc i only know of what has happened in indianapolis.. i guess call peyton more low key.. as far as what I know... but I am sure I dont know even half of it.. Im well aware of the whole girls being flown in and all that goes with that.. but that is not what i am talking about with peyton.. his is more "normal' as far as i know.. i met him through a friend on the team.. we all were hanging out together.. but what is different bw he and tiger is that to the best of my knowledge.. peyton and ashley have an "open" marriage.. soo she has her fun too...

Huh. Can we even be shocked by these groundless (but yet so plausible!) accusations at this point? We have one person claiming that Eli's been whore-mongering for years and that Peyton's got his own stable of nightclub ponies he likes to get down and dirty with in Indy. Oh, and he has an open marriage.

Hopefully, neither one of the Manning boys will run over a fire hydrant anytime soon or else they also could become TMZ chum. In due time, children. In due time.

Update: Apparently Eli's own transgressions have made the interwebs already. Even Leitch wrote about it.

*****

Thanks for your continued support of Deadspin. Go Birds. Hurdy Gurdy in full effect.

Manning admitted to the scandalous crime of writing his name on a wall in the visitors' lockeroom, along with the date and the score of the first game ever played at the stadium. Manning says he was asked to do it by a stadium employee—because who does that otherwise?—but Wade Phillips insists that none of his people would ever do that! No, the only explanation is that Eli is a classy, classy jerk.

"Eli is a classy player, a great player," Phillips said. "I really respect him and his family. I don't think he meant anything by it. But it wasn't a great thing for him to do, obviously.

"Things come back around in this league. I respect the teams we play and the players we play. That's the way I approach games, and I expect our players to do the same."

RESPECT! That was not good, Eli! I mean, it's fine for Brandon Jacobs to say he hates the Cowboys like a sickness, but at least he didn't write it down anywhere. Or for Patrick Crayton to compare the Giants to a rabid dog. (Hey, it was a favorable comparison!) However, we can still get some selective quoting of Cowboy linebacker Bradie James to add some fuel to the fire. This comes from an ESPN story about the Manning autograph:

"We won't forget that," said James, a defensive captain who ranted Wednesday about his dislike of the Giants. "It just makes for a more intense game."

Wow, he hates writing! Except that not exactly how he said it....

"Eli signed the inside of the locker room, the wall," James said. "He put the score. They ruined our first game. We won't forget that. It just makes for a more intense game."

So James actually remembers that the Dallas lost to New York and that might be a valid reason to be upset at them? You know, for being such tough guys, football player are awfully sensitive.

Dallas Cowboys not happy about Eli's signature on wall [Fort Worth Star-Telegram]
Writing is on the Cowboys Stadium wall for New York Giants' Manning [Dallas Morning News]
NY Giants' Brandon Jacobs loves to hate Dallas Cowboys [Dallas Morning News]

•Did you hear Lopez Tonight is coming to TBS? Day 1 of the playoffs went just as planned, with the Phillies, Yankees and Dodgers all winning. Wait, back up. The Dodgers? I guess whoever said they have no pitching was mistaken. Getting 3.2 innings from Randy Wolf is more than they could have hoped for.

•Dez Bryant is ruled ineligible not because he met with Deion Sanders, but because he lied about meeting with Deion Sanders. Let this be a lesson to our younger readers: if your parents ever catch you doing something bad, it's best to be honest and tell them you were with Deion Sanders.

•Allen Iverson may miss the Grizzlies' season opener as he recovers from a hamstring injury, but let's get real here: if you're counting on Allen Iverson in 2009 to be a crucial part of your team, you're probably not shooting for the stars anyway.

•Your injured quarterbacks update: Donovan McNabb probably, Tim Tebow maybe, Eli Manning maybe not. JaMarcus Russell isn't injured, but is listed as doubtful to play "football."

•Phoenix pulls out a win and forces the WNBA Finals to a deciding fifth game. This was exactly what the league didn't need; there's no way anyone will be paying attention to the WNBA once the UFL starts up tonight.

•Stars broadcaster Daryl Reaugh predicts Dallas will win their opening game. They don't. Now Reaugh's springing for free tickets for all in attendance. Let's hope he doesn't make the guarantee again; have you seen Marty Turco lately? Reaugh may have to spring for season tickets.

•We close with a link to the top ten hits in youth football. Does it make it sadder or funnier that they're children? We say funnier. A highlight:

"See the picture of a concrete column in the visitor locker room in the new Cowboys stadium," the NBCDFW.com user wrote. "I heard the locker room was spat on and had many used jock straps hanging from the mirrors and other places too. What class."

If the story is true don't judge Eli too harshly, he was probably just trying to fit in with the older boys. He's so impressionable.

The boys were called on stage during the band's performance of King of New Orleans. Gentlemen, Kenny Chesney would like an explanation.

Photo via friend of CajunBoy

Phillipsburg won, 27-12, in a rematch of the 1993 game that ended in a 7-7 tie. As we can see by the photo, the game had Gatorade's corporate fingerprints all over it — which kind of detracted from the charm — but it was a success nonetheless. The game drew 13,350 at Lafayette College's Fisher Stadium in Pennsylvania, with your honorary coaches Peyton and Eli Manning, whose actual functions were not clear. But the players and fans seemed to have a good time.

"It feels like you're back in high school again," Courtney Samra said. "The guys have been so pumped up for this. They can't sleep. ... They're acting 16 again, all of them."

Peyton Manning was impressed.

"You can tell how important football is around here," he said. "There's no question about that. To have this kind of crowd for a reunion game 15 years later, it tells you that football is important year-round. That's the kind of town you want to play in."

Among the players were two cancer survivors, a guy who lost 57 pounds and another who discovered a serious leg disorder during a physical to get cleared for the game. His leg is now on the road to being healed. Gatorade is planning to make the game an annual event, searching the nation for other old high school rivals who want to settle old scores. This will not really pique my interest until they replay a game from the 1950s. You think you're better than me?

Here we go.

Unfinished Business: Phillipsburg-Easton Replay 1993 Football Clash That Ended In A Tie [The Star Legder]
Easton Vs. Phillipsburg [OnTheScene]

•"Maybe two years ago, that was in vogue. But he's a made man now, a Super Bowl winner. You can only say he had a disappointing game and that Eli Manning is not quite - here we go again - his brother." [NY Daily News]

• "After this," center Shaun O'Hara confessed, inside the funeral-parlor still of the Giants locker room, "you almost wonder if it isn't better to not make the playoffs than to play the way we did out there today." [NY Post]

• "The magic, or well-timed competence, so evident in the Giants’ run through the playoffs last season seemed absent. Over and over, the Giants made a succession of adept plays only to stumble on third down, converting 3 of 13 attempts." [NY Times]

• "This is not the end of the world. The Giants won the Super Bowl last year, after all, in the most inspiring fashion possible. Yesterday didn’t eradicate that. And the Giants should still be considered one of the best teams in the NFC next year as well. But that feeling of invincibility, that notion of New York superiority that the Giants were the lone local team to provide us with over the last year … that’s gone. Blame Eli, blame Coughlin, blame Carney, blame Plaxico, blame whomever you would like. All that matters is that there are only four teams who have the opportunity to experience what the Giants did last year, and none of them are the Giants." [NY Mag]

•" 'It’s terrible,” said Eddie Nunez, 29, a Giants fan from Flushing, after watching his team go down 23-11 to the rival Philadelphia Eagles in the divisional round of the playoffs. “I was nothing but confident. I put a lot of money on this game.' " [AM New York]

• "The Giants were like that a year ago. We wondered how much they would miss Plaxico Burress Sunday, and Michael Strahan and Osi Umenyiora. They missed them all, mightily. It turned out they were never the same on offense after Burress shot himself in the leg and tried to shoot his team out of a cannon at the same time." [NY Daily News]

• "The Giants will never admit it packing their bags on Blue Monday, but their chance for a repeat championship was shot dead the night Plaxico Burress shot himself in the leg inside a nightclub at the end of November." [NY Post]

PHOTO: Philly.com

But Pierce, whose muscular chest and steely-eyed glances apparently make one Midwestern boy's heart all aflutter, (Yeah — who says he hates black people?), wasn't at Tenjune nightclub that night according to the paper.

Those G-men who were in attendance included Shaun O'Hara, David Diehl, Amani Toomer, Brandon Jacobs and Kevin Boss. Oh, and 28-year-old Eli, fresh-faced and gawky, apparently getting a crotch-grind from his wife Abby, while Beyonce's "Single Ladies" blared. Who in his party got j-mop duty? Probably O'Hara.

The Ongoing Adventures of Elisha Manning [KSK]

Total home control, or automation, was Eli’s overwhelming priority when the Mannings recently gutted and renovated their 3,000-square-foot Hoboken, NJ, condo, with spectacular views of Manhattan.

Among the features in the Hoboken condo: Hidden speakers, one-touch control of audio, video, motorized shades and lights, steam-resistant bathroom speakers, hidden bar, automated kitchen. I couldn't help but notice however that, surprisingly, there is no orgasmatron.

Inside Eli Manning's Automated Condo [Electronic House]

Sadly, there are no Village People moments like Brady Quinn had at his sister's wedding to A.J. Hawk, but if you do scroll through the lovely photo album, there are plenty of Manning-like moments that will clearly be cherished always. The New York Giants' quarterback appears to be coming out of his shell a little bit — that's what a Super Bowl victory will do to a man.

Hope this photographer doesn't get in trouble for leaking them.

Another photo after the jump.

Manning Wedding Photos? [LiveJournalSite]

And more photos at KSK, of course [KSK]

UPDATE: So, it appears this is probably not the actual Manning wedding reception as originally posted, but some other event where all the Mannings are in attendance and quite festive. Unless this was another wedding reception done stateside in addition to the one they had in Mexico. Just to be safe, we'll call it a "reception" for now.

Sing it, Eli!

As you can tell from the photo, McGrew chose to step out in what appears to be the prom dress worn by every girl impregnated by age 17.:

Abby McGrew's dress is "too short, too tight, and doesn't fit well. The zipper doesn't zip and she's bursting out of it," said Linda Mann, head of Mann Media, who was eyeing photos of the beauty yesterday.

Or that. And Eli? Well, he needs some help too.

"I think he's still adjusting to Manhattan," said one sympathetic partygoer.

Hey, he appears to be wearing shoes, so that's a good start.

All Eyes On Mrs. Manning [NY Post]

For the last post before Mother's Day, it would only be appropriate to feature the professional athlete who's the closest to his mother. That would be Super Bowl MVP Buster Bluth Eli Manning, who finally took his requisite parade float down Main Street of Disneyland on Wednesday after missing it in February due to the fake-sounding excuse of "airport delays".

I enjoy that all the kids supposedly there to see him aren't Giants fans. The Chargers fan especially is a little curious. Someone needs a quick history lesson. And don't let Philip Rivers catch wind of that, unless you're ready to ask somebodddaaayyyy.

• The shocking Mel Kiper-Todd McShay follicle swap [The Sports Hernia]
  
• A glimpse of Manning wedding elegance [Loser With Socks]
  
• Matt Ryan: Draft Expert [One Droo Hill]
  
• Scoring worse than Terry Bradshaw on the Wonderlic? That's a-paddlin'. [The Wizard of Odds]
  
• Jannero Pargo is a hobbit. [Best of New Orleans Blog]
  
• Max Kellerman, Simmons thief. [The Smittblog]
  
• C.C. Sabathia is handy with a razor. [Screwballs]

More photos here.

I'm not much for memorabilia collecting, but I wish I had been there: How often do you get a chance to get a men's flap handbag signed by two Super Bowl quarterbacks?

No Hard Feelings [Kenneth In The 212]
Brady, Eli Square Off Once Again — At Store Opening [SportsbyBrooks]

One would think someone like, say, Adrian Peterson would be a natural pick. Well, I've got news for you, mister: There are some rumblings that EA Sports is looking toward Super Bowl MVP Eli Manning to grace the latest edition of the game.

If Manning is selected to the cover of the 2009 Madden game Eli would be another quarterback in a long line of past Madden covers including McNabb, Vick, and Culpepper.

Yikes! Some careers those guys turned out to have after that. Good thing Vince Young reversed the Madden Curse this past year with a statistically horrid season that somehow resulted in a playoff appearance.

I'm guessing the squash stick will be the flashy new innovation this year, then.

We've always been annoyed by the phrase "Canyon of Heroes." Strahan looks happy, though. And honestly: That middle guy, man, those kickers come in all shapes and sizes.

As we mentioned in our Times column, we were almost surprised to realize that the Eli Manning after the game was still the same dopey, earnest, dork character he was before the game. We expected him to take off his helmet and suddenly talk like Barry White. That's how amazing his fourth quarter was. Truthfully now: You've never seen Peyton be that gutsy, have you? Where did that come from?

We suspect most of you are like us, and feel as if the ground has shifted beneath your feet: Eli Manning — the guy who would rather be playing squash — turned out to be a true champion. We are flabbergasted, and we will never doubt him, or that family, again. At this point, we're ready to ask businessman Cooper Manning to pull us out of this recession.