facepalm Page index.xml - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Stephen A. Smith got Ballsacked by a meme that was two months old
Ballsack Sports emerged in late 2021 as a purveyor of satirical headlines and semi-professional graphics that were fleshed out by unsourced quotes....
If Ever A Moment Called For Facepalm, It's Philip Rivers Last Night
How do you blow a 24-0 halftime lead? Account for six turnovers, as Philip Rivers did last night in guiding the Chargers to a 35-24 final score, and you might just do it. To say it was laughable is an understatement, though most of us were, indeed, laughing. (Hopefully after the final interception—...
Ryan Anderson's Miss At The Buzzer Was Worthy Of His Facepalm Reaction
Not to take anything away from Dirk Nowitzki's game-winning basket, but the 5.9 seconds remaining were enough for Orlando to get off not one but two final shots in an attempt to tie the 100-98 Mavericks lead. The second of these—an awkward scoop at the buzzer from under the rim—didn't fall for Ryan...
The Cowboys' Season, In One Jason Garrett Facepalm
Your morning roundup for Dec. 12, the day we learned the benefits of prison sojourns. Photo via Ryan W. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors. ...
The Worst News Lede You'll Read All Year (UPDATE)
"For the past month, body parts have been piling up around Miami-Dade and Broward counties like extra pounds on Kim Kardashian come Christmas time." [Miami New-Times, Google cache Screengrab below]...
Rick Reilly®, Twit
Not to nitpick or anything, but 13 of the "tweets" in Rick Reilly®'s awful "Things I'd Tweet If I Didn't Hate Tweeting" are longer than 140 characters....
Weekend Winner: The Dan Haren Swindle
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the Angels, who shoplifted Dan Haren out of Arizona and so thoroughly snookered the Diamondbacks that someone should check if Chase Field is encased in aluminum siding....
Dumb TV People Interview Thierry Henry, Remind America Why It Can't Have Nice Soccer Things
Click to viewThe newly minted New York Red Bull visited the set of Fox 5's morning show, Chirpy Morons Sit on Sofa and Talk About Vitamins, and submitted to a whole host of indignities. Watch, if you can. [MLS Talk, via @GrantWahl]...
ESPN And FarmVille Joining Forces To Annoy The Absolute Piss Out Of Everyone Everywhere
Oh, look. Sports Business Journal's Eric Fisher found a Horrifyingly Large Turd on his farm to share with his friends! "One of new ESPN social media games will be ESPNUville, their take on ultrapopular FarmVille....." [@EricFisherSBJ]...
Joe Biden Mourns The 29 Dead West Virginia Miners By Somberly Crapping On Rich Rodriguez
Here's our walking facepalm of a vice president, speaking at a memorial for the dead miners: "They loved hunting, fishing, riding horses and four-wheelers. They hated the way Coach Rodriguez left West Virginia for Michigan." [TNR]...
Black Hispanic Ballplayers Aren't Black Enough For Torii Hunter
"They're not us," Torii Hunter tells USA Today. "They're impostors." Yeah, he's going there....
Ball The Pretty Horses: High Schoolers Show School Spirit With Equine Double-Team T-Shirts (UPDATE)
It seems a few hairy-palmed scamps at Houston's Memorial High School recently sold the t-shirt you see here to commemorate their Mustangs' football game against archrival Stratford. Think this is the only bit of Memorial-related horsefucking? Nay!...
Help!
Paul Shirley, hoops journeyman and dime-store Jim Bouton, thinks the Beatles are totally overrated and today's music is vastly superior. Moment I stopped reading: "Just as Dean Koontz came after Bram Stoker, Oasis came after The Beatles." [ESPN]...
Chris Berman: The Next Cronkite
In the wake of Walter Cronkite's passing, the Washington Post asked a few famous personages to "suggest public figures who meet the Cronkite standard of trustworthiness." The list is pretty much as you'd expect. Oprah, Bill Moyers, Chris Berman....
<em>Tennessean</em> Brings Out The Dead, Asks About Exciting New Line Of Restaurants
Here's the front page of the Tennessean's weekly Davidson A.M. edition, which is one of those zoned supplements that go yellow on your lawn and contain nothing but Zales ads and the occasional fluffy interview with a dead person....
Stan Van Gundy A "Working-Class Hero," Says Newspaper For Rich People (UPDATE)
There is no worse fate for an NBA final than to be turned into a roundtable discussion on the brilliance of the coach. Someone please tell the Wall Street Journal: Stan Van Gundy is not the reason people are watching....
<em>Sports Illustrated South Africa</em> Distances Itself From Hitlery Ad Campaign
Remember that rather gauche Sports Illustrated South Africa fake-cover ad campaign? The one with Der Führer getting the ol' SI jinx dropped on his head? Well, the magazine now claims it didn't like the ads, either....
<em>Sports Illustrated South Africa</em>'s Quirky New Ad Campaign: Black Panthers, Hitler
It can't be easy marketing an American-style sports magazine in a country only 15 years removed from apartheid, which is probably why Sports Illustrated South Africa feels the need to give the hard sell now. By which I mean, Hitler....
Yankee Stadium Threatening To Get 100 Percent More Insufferable
Great news! The most obnoxiously self-indulgent team in college football wants to join forces with the most obnoxiously self-indulgent team in baseball. Yes, folks: Notre Dame wants to play football in shiny new Yankee Stadium....
Rich Person Wonders Why Rich People Are So Bad At Sports
"It seems logical that children of privilege who have access to world-class coaching and state-of-the-art facilities should develop professional-level talent, but for some reason that almost never happens." The answer, he says, "is elusive." [VF.com]...