But, the good news is that we have been getting sporadic reports from Zach, live at Churchill Downs. Here's some of what he's sent us so far:

So far the only cool thing I've seen is cleavage. Lots and lots of cleavage.

I'm in the grandstand. This place is a Republican's dream—all the white people are in suits and all the black people are employees. As for me, I'm in a khaki suit with cufflinks, double fisting a Bud and a mint julip.

Apparently telling people "I'm going to puke" does not get one to the front of the line for the men's room.

If you stare at seersucker long enough, you'll see a dolphin jumping at you in 3D.

Local news coverage started at 6 a.m. At around 9 a.m. they interviewed folks in the infield who smuggled in a zip lock bag full of grain alcohol. They followed that up with an interview of security guards.

Oh. And OJ is near section 118.

Anyway, right now I am in the University of Louisville's parking lot, in line for the Anytime Portable. Which is overflowing.

The Louisville folks are taking a lot of pride in their Orange Bowl victory. Banners abound. I want to remind them that it was against Wake Forest, but am afraid I'l get locked in the port-a-potty.

The only celeb I saw was Michael MacDonald. But that's probably because Tom Brady was busy nailing The Queen..

Here's to hoping that Street Sense gets through the Preakness without getting into a fatal crash, like that great horse, Dale Earnhardt.

OJ, you say? So there is a chance that a horse will die this afternoon. That's great news.

Anyway, I'm about done with the Derby for the day. I just can't watch this for another hour ... in all the excitement of the year of Barbaro, I had forgotten how boring, inhumane, and silly this whole thing is. If we get more updates from Zach, though, they'll be right here.

For our horse racing analysis here on Deadspin, we turn to New York Rangers forward Jaromir Jagr. From Steve Zipay at Newsday.com:

I'll give you my picks for Saturday's Kentucky Derby tomorrow, but decided to ask Jagr at practice if he even knew the name of any horse in the running.

"Barbaro" he said.

When reporters told him that Barbaro was dead, he asked: "Does that mean he can't win?"

"Not unless he's got a great jockey," I said.

Then the Rangers' captain replied: "There's only one horse: It's me."

So that's who I'm going with ... Jaromir Jagr. He might as well win it. Honestly, I think the best thing that could happen here is for another horse to die, hopefully a photogenic once. Pretty soon, people are going to get over Barbaro, and they'll need another cause.

And for more Derby stuff, I encourage you to browse through the links below, including Unsilent Majority's breakdown at Name of the Year.

HNOTY: Barbaro, Schmarbaro [Name of the Year]
Ahmad Rashad with Barbaro: The lost interview [The Sports Hernia Blog]
Kentucky Derby Infield [Kentucky Derby]
Paul Lo Duca Presents: Kentucky Derby Winners! [Bugs and Cranks]
Horses and courses... [Blue Notes]
Did Merv Griffin's horse get the bute or the boot? [Steroid Nation]