According to interviews Thomas gave to Sports Illustrated this week, the biggest head turner in the book is the claim—made by Magic and his agent, Lon Rosen—that after Johnson was diagnosed with HIV in 1991, Thomas was the one spreading rumors that Magic might have contracted the virus because he was gay.

"Isiah kept questioning people about it,'' Magic says. "I couldn't believe that. The one guy I thought I could count on had all these doubts. It was like he kicked me in the stomach.''

Thomas says that's "bullshit." His own brother died of AIDS and he says he knows better than to spread rumors like that. Thomas also claims that he was the one who led the charge to get Magic a spot in the 1992 All-Star Game, when most of the players were refusing to take the court with an HIV+ player—a fact that's conveniently left out of the book. Now he's furious to discover that this legendary friendship was apparently a sham.

"It's so hypocritical,'' said Thomas, "There's this public person and then there's this b.s. person. There's Earvin and then there's Magic. OK, I understand you've got to sell a book. But if this is how you sell it, then who's kicking who in the stomach? And it's just like the line he perpetuated that he got me the Knicks' job. Oh, yeah? Ask [Knicks owner] Jim Dolan. Call Barry Watkins [the Knicks' senior VP]. That's a lie.

"You're talking about being two-faced? Magic says he put me up for the job, that he was showing up in hard times and telling me everything was OK. And I come to find out he's been the one stabbing me in the back. ... I'm really hurt and disappointed, particularly with the Olympic team, if he was doing that stuff.''

The last part refers to another item in the book, where Magic basically admits that Isiah was shut out of the Olympic Dream Team because no one wanted to play with him. He also blames the whole "Jordan freeze out" at the '85 All-Star Game on Thomas too. Meanwhile, Isiah says the even bigger lie is Magic's current friendship with Larry Bird. ("Magic hated Larry, and he tried to make other people hate Larry.")

It takes a special kind of jerk to make people feel sorry for Isiah Thomas, but Magic just might be that guy. Whoever you believe, it's pretty clear from this sordid tale—and Michael Jordan's Hall of Fame speech, among other incidents—that pretty much every superstar you idolized as a kid is a selfish, insecure, backstabbing prick. Of course, that's also why they were all such awesome basketball players.

Isiah Thomas blasts Magic Johnson over criticisms in new book [SI.com]

PERRY: What about diseases that are eminently treatable and you can live with for a long, long time quite healthily if you just get some basic drugs?
BAKER: Like Magic Johnson.
PERRY: Like Magic with his faked AIDS. Magic faked AIDS.
BAKER: You think Magic faked AIDS for sympathy?
PERRY: I'm convinced that Magic faked AIDS.
BAKER: Yeah, me too.
PERRY: It falls apart —
BAKER: Which is horrible.
PERRY: — when you get into motivation. I'm not sure why, but I'm pretty sure he faked AIDS.
BAKER: I've got a great email here from —
PERRY: 'Cause he's the only cured AIDS guy ever.

Hear the audio here.

Magic Johnson's reply:

“I am extremely disappointed in KTLK in Minneapolis. I am outraged that Chris Baker and Langdon Perry would minimize such a serious and deadly issue. Millions are dying from HIV/AIDS and the fact that they would make jokes about my status is unbelievable,” Johnson said. “Chris, Langdon and KTLK should use their power in a more positive light by encouraging people to get tested for this disease instead of making up such ridiculous lies.”

It's not clear how they come to the conclusion that Johnson was making up his illness, but does it really matter? The first rule in talk radio is to be noticed, and if you have to make up crazy crap like this, then so be it. The more outrageous, the better; I call it the Ann Coulter Effect. My main worry in all of this is that there are powerful alien civilizations out there who only know us through the radio waves we're sending into space. Pretty soon they're just going to get fed up and go all Krpyton on our ass.

Baker's blog includes a section in which he tracks the number of days that Al Franken has "dodged" his show. Well, I'm trying to get in touch with you, Chris. How long are you going to avoid us?

For another take on Baker and Perry, check out this Countdown With Keith Olbermann segment.

Magic Johnson Rips KTLK Over 'Faked AIDS' Comment [Minneapois Star-Tribune]
Minneapolis Radio Hosts 'Convinced' That Magic Johnson 'Faked AIDS' [Media Matters]

Most frighteningly, as The Serious Tip points out, their collective voices sounds like ... well, an old friend.

There is no better way to celebrate the beginning of the Lakers-Celtics NBA Finals. Too bad we can't see the short shorts!

Also to help get you in the mood, Magic Johnson and Bird do some reminiscing over at Fox Sports. Game 1 in just a few short hours, everyone!

Magic, Bird Revisit Captivating Rivalry Of The '80s [Fox Sports]

Magic's role would be to run the business side of things, Michael would be completely in charge of basketball, and Barkley would "handle the sponsors and dealing with people." We know Magic can make money, and there's no doubt that Barkley could take a sponsor out and show them a good time. The only question would be MJ, and, well, you know... it's not like we can just forget that his stint with the Wizards happened.

Still, though, for an opposing player, to see Magic, MJ, and Charles strolling into your building, laughing, chatting, and smoking cigars, that might just scare the hell out of some younger players. And you know that Charles Oakley is going to be involved somehow. That intimidation by itself would be worth 10-20 wins a year for whatever hypothetical team they'd end up buying.

NBA royalty running a team? It could happen [Chicago Tribune]

"It's like saying, 'Magic, should your wife give you another chance? He's saying Ron Artest should have no more second chances. What's worse — me saying I want to be traded or you cheating on your wife?"

Yeah, we're not gonna touch this one.

Touche [The Airing Of Grievances]
Ron Artest Is Freestyling A Bit On Magic Johnson [YAYSports!]
Artest: All-Team Indecisive Motherfucka! [J.E. Skeets]