Lincecum won his second straight Cy Young and became the first pitcher to earn the award in each of his first full seasons. And Ricky Williams took over for an injured Ronnie Brown and ran circles around Carolina, putting up 119 yards and three touchdowns and keeping the Dolphins within reach of the Patriots. As you know, Lincecum and Williams share a taste in mild recreational drugs. In the latter's case we're probably in for a brace of stories about how Ricky has gotten serious and shaved his dreads and redeemed himself and all that. (Look, there goes one now!) For now, though, the lesson is simply this: Winners smoke a shit-ton of weed. Suck it, Bill Bennett.

Honorable Mention: The Baseball Writers' Association of America, which once again got it right with Lincecum, even though his 15 wins represented the smallest total for a Cy Young winner who was a full-time starter in a non-strike year. At this rate, Mauer's MVP is in the bag. We're all statgeeks now. [BBWAA]

Got a candidate for Last Night's Winner? Send it to Dash at dashiell@deadspin.com.

Williams is spending his offseason studying at an acupuncture and massage college, conveniently located in a Kendall, Florida, strip mall. It's all part of his larger goal to find spiritual balance through holistic healing. He's studied yoga and meditation in India and is making plans to become an osteopathic doctor after football. Oh, and he's off the dope now so let it go, you jackals!

The main purpose of this New York Times profile is to show that Williams may still be a hippy-dippy man, but that he doesn't have to toke up on the skunk weed to find a little peace. (OK, the Times didn't use the words "skunk weed." That was mine.)

"Since I've become famous for it, I'm amazed at how many people ask me to smoke," Williams said. "For me to move on with my career, this has to be behind me. I don't want to keep being reminded of it on a daily basis."

So Ricky's moved on from the pot, discovering things like Hindu medicine and craniosacral therapy. (Which is no joke, by the way. I've had that done on me and it cleared up a lifetime of sinus problems.) He's a believer in the "healing power of touch" and his dream is to someday be an NFL "shaman" curing players—mind, body, soul—with his beautiful hands. Good for him. I just hope the players he's taking care of don't ask for a little mary jane to the cut the edge off, man.

Ricky Williams Is Hoping to Heal Others, and His Image [NY Times]

Since you probably have the munchies right now, why not enjoy a nice big Subway sandwich, like the ones enjoyed by your fog-brained idol? King Abdominals is back on the pitchman trail hawking those tasty, tasty hoagies and that means the Drug War is over! Oh, and pot won, thanks to Phelps' biggest endorsement of all.

Subway, however, accepted Phelps' apology and in his debut spot for the sandwich chain, the Olympian thanks the chain back. You can almost hear all the blunts lighting up in support as Sly & The Family Stone's "Thank You (Falettinme Be Mice Elf Agin)" kicks in.

Yes, the fact that noted drug addict Michael Phelps is still allowed to sell sandwiches—to children—is proof that the United States is filled with unrepentant Harolds and Kumars who don't care that our greatest hero has destroyed his life with all manner of baked goods, simply because he shares certain physical characteristics of a dolphin. His life wasn't destroyed, and that just doesn't make sense to some people.

In other words, there were no serious consequences. To the extent that endorsement opportunities are a rough metric of how well someone in public life is liked, admired, respected, the bong-heard-round-the-world scandal might as well never have happened. With the benefit of hindsight, Kellogg execs might well be kicking themselves.

[ ... ]

What we're witnessing is the death of a certain kind of shame.

And what the world needs now is more shame. And Doritos. Seriously, are you going to eat that whole bag by yourself?

Michael Phelps ads prove a new cultural tolerance of marijuana [Los Angeles Times]
Ad of the Day: "Phleps" [Ad Week]

Three months after everyone stopped caring about the WBC, it can finally be revealed that the Puerto Rican backstop tested positive for marijuana, a drug that for some reason they actually test for. This will surely shake the foundation of international baseball tournaments, much as it will shake the faith of Cubs fans everywhere who think the universe is out to get them. Why Geovany Soto? Why?

"While I fully acknowledge my inappropriate behavior, I want to assure my fans and my family that this was an isolated incident," Soto said in a statement released by the Cubs during their game against the Tigers. "I do not say this to minimize or deflect from my conduct and I fully understand the ramifications of my actions. I have and will accept any and all consequences.

"I am fully dedicated to the game of baseball and my teammates, and I apologize for any distraction and embarrassment this may cause them.

Yes, I'm sure he will never do it again since he is the first baseball player in history that drugs have ever happened to. Soto has been banned from international competition for two years (oh no!), but will not be punished by Major League Baseball or the Cubs because even though weed is illegal, it doesn't make your arms bigger.

Geovany Soto tested positive for pot at WBC [Chicago Sun-Times]

You may say that the infamous News of the World photos don't actually prove anything, but you take those (what was he hitting, Aquafina?), and add Phelps' confession, plus eyewitness accounts that Phelps was "totally wasted all weekend," and you may just get a visit from Sheriff Buford T. Justice.

Richland County Sheriff Leon Lott says he will charge Michael Phelps with a crime if he determines the Olympics hero smoked marijuana in Richland County. Phelps, who set a record with eight gold medals in the 2008 Summer Olympics, was photographed smoking a marijuana pipe at a November party in Columbia.

“This case is no different than any other case,” Lott said Monday. “This one might be a lot easier since we have photographs of someone using drugs and a partial confession. It’s a relatively easy case once we can determine where the crime occurred.”

Pot may not land you in jail where you come from, but you're in Richland County now, boy. Possession of marijuana is a misdemeanor, punishable by up to 30 days in jail or a $570 fine, plus court costs.

However, simply appearing like you're stoned in South Carolina? That's still okay. Such as.

Phelps Could Face Charges In SC [Inside Charm City]
Richland Sheriff Could Charge Phelps [The State]

Well. That's not so bad. But the Brits seem angry at Michael Phelps:

One party-goer who witnessed the star’s behaviour told the News of the World: “He was out of control from the moment he got there.

“If he continues to party like that I’d be amazed if he ever won any more medals again.”

Phelps’ aides went into a panic over our story and offered us a raft of extraordinary incentives not to run the bong picture.

It was on November 6, weeks after his Beijing triumph, that 23-year-old Phelps surprised students at the University Of South Carolina in Columbia by showing up unannounced at a house party.

He was visiting Jordan Matthews, a girl he was secretly seeing who was a student there.

Our source revealed: “Michael came to visit Jordan but ended up just getting wasted every night.

Maybe he was just trying to help keep his caloric intake up? I'm sure he'll have to apologize for being a personal disappointment to America.

What A Dope [News Of The World]

But what are the chances this isn't the ADHD swim boy that took over the world? We'll find out soon enough. But does a photo of Michael Phelps (or whomever) smoking out of a bong ruin any potential marketing opportunities? And what if it's just a hookah? As soon as the photo hits, we'll throw it up.

*****

Get some sleep tonight. It's a long day of Super Bowl madness tomorrow. Dash will be here during the day to give you all your non-Super Bowl/pregame news and Matt Sussman will be live blogging. Hooray.

NFL Source: Travis Henry Tests Positive Again [My Fox Colorado]
Report: Travis Henry Fails Drug Test [PFT]

Generous guy, Ciro Mancuso. But I suppose one can afford to be generous when one once pleaded guilty to running a $120 million marijuana ring that brought about 67 tons of the herb into the United States. And from what I know about the Deadspin audience, I'm guessing that at least a few of you were satisfied Ciro Mancuso customers. They thank you for your patronage.

Julia Mancuso was five years old when Ciro was sent away to do about five years in prison for his business interests. But he got out, and thanks in no small part to you, was able to help his daughter on her quest to win gold.

Family Helps Mancuso Achieve Golden Dream [Yahoo! News]
Skiing was Mancuso's getaway through tough childhood years [Las Vegas Sun]

Not that the NBA's All-Star weekend is about basketball at all... it is about parties; the kind of parties to which I am never likely to be invited. But, if you'd like a quick look inside one such shindig, we've gotten our hands on an excerpt of a book entitled "The Sixth Man", by ESPN.com's Chris Palmer, in which he follows around and observes the lives of Rip Hamilton, Tracy McGrady, Luol Deng, Damon Jones, and Elton Brand. Check this out:

When Snoop Dog took the stage at last year s Players Association party in Los Angeles, David Stern and Billy Hunter stood in the wings, admiring the show, as a heavy cloud of marijuana smoke floated in the air above theirheads.

David Stern is a lot cooler than we thought. Not only is he mellow enough to engage in "a chill session" with Bill Simmons, but he can also grab players association boss Billy Hunter, and get loose under a big Cheech cloud with some of his players.

And why not? How can you truly understand your players if you aren't willing to step into their world, and at least catch a little contact buzz? I think this is something Stern and Hunter should consider doing before they sit down to hammer out the NBA's next collective bargaining agreement, too. Things would go a lot smoother.

More from "The Sixth Man" after the jump.

The Sixth Man : A Season Inside the NBA Playground [Amazon.com]
RadioShack Shooting Stars [NBA.com]

When Snoop Dog took the stage at last year s Players Association party in Los Angeles, David Stern and Billy Hunter stood in the wings, admiring the show, as a heavy cloud of marijuana smoke floated in the air above their heads. This year, the party s planners are hoping for a classier affair. Thousands of dressed-to-impress invitees pass through the convention center s doors to find tables draped in black velvet and elaborate ice sculptures beside each of the dozen bars. Mandy, Elena Bergeron The Magazine s rookie NBA reporter and I are snacking on finger foods when every head in the place turns.

LeBron James has made his entrance, dressed in jeans and Timberland boots. At his side are his three best friends from Akron, Ohio Randy, Maverick, and Shorty. They roll everywhere together, calling themselves the 4 Horsemen. Each owns a pair of Air Force Ones with little Four Horsemen logos on the heels compliments of Nike. Talk about limited edition. Tonight the foursome dons Four Horsemen letterman jackets with their names embroidered on the front. They also have a fifth in tow: New Orleans Hornets rookie J.R. Smith. Every now and again, LeBron taps him on the shoulder to point something out. J.R. smiles and nods. The rest of the time he stands there with his hands in his pockets.

As far as I know, Smith has no earthly connection to James. They did not go to camp together in high school or play in the same prep all-star game. One wears Nike. The other adidas. But a few months back, I noticed that LeBron often raises his hands above his head after a big play, palms outward, index fingers and thumbs touching to create a spade. Jay-Z uses this gesture to promote his Roc-A-Fella Records empire. LeBron and Jay are friends. The rapper often calls the player s Horsemen buddies to check up on them. And then, one night on SportsCenter, I saw Smith flash the Roc sign, too.

For young players like Smith, being linked to LeBron is the height of cool. Sebastian Telfair showed me LeBron s number in his cell phone when he was a senior in high school. But older guys like to be associated with him, too. When the Four Horsemen left their courtside seats during a playoff game last year, in a move that smelled of desperation, Robert Tractor Traylor stepped in the LeBron s path to make sure he got a pound. Before boarding a team bus at the Finals, Kobe talked with LeBron for a good two minutes, which is longer than I ve seen him talk with anyone. Keep it up, he said, before sending LeBron off with a satisfied smile on his face.

Now there are so many well-wishers crowding LeBron, I find myself craving space. I make my way to the front of the room just as Nelly and the St. Lunatics are claiming the stage. In the player VIP section, Allen Iverson two-steps up a storm to "Hot In Herre." Marcus Camby chats with a league official nearby. Quentin Richardson is whispering in the ear of his fiancee, the recording star Brandy. Behind me, Gilbert Arenas is sporting a small fur. He looks like he borrowed that coat from his grandmother, quips Elena.

I head to a bar for a drink. When I return, I can t find Elena. At 5-foot-even, she s easy to lose at NBA parties. I have no trouble, however, spotting my friend Jack Stevens, who handles security for the Wizards. When Tim Thomas played in Milwaukee, Stevens was his personal bodyguard. His duties included living in Thomas s house and driving Thomas s silver Bentley. The two had a falling out when Thomas was traded to the Knicks. So now Stevens lives with the Wizards Peter Ramos. The 7-foot-3 project from Puerto Rico certainly doesn t own a Bentley.

Stevens stands as stiffly as ever, feet shoulder-width apart, arms folded, eyes darting side to side. If there s a Wizard in the room, he s on call.

There s Gilbert right over there, I tell him.

Where?

I point to the grandmother coat and Stevens takes off in that direction, resuming his stance a few feet away from the Wizard s guard. It s Damon Jones who can really use his help, though. He nearly gets crushed when Shaq s extra-large posse brushes up against the crowd of LeBron worshippers. I believe something similar happened to Donkey in Shrek 2.

As soon as the house lights come up, LeBron and his boys make a quick exit, finding a safe perch near the top of the stairs in the lobby where they can watch the revelers spill into the night. LeBron looks like a king on his thrown sitting up there, surrounded by his court. But poor J.R. Smith is lost in the fray below.

What s up, J.R.? Chris Palmer, ESPN The Magazine.

Oh, yeah, I remember you, he says.

We d met at a few of his high school all-star games.

You rolling with LeBron now?

That s my man. He said he was down to roll tonight so I wanted to come with him. We re cool. We ve been boys for awhile.

Even at 6-foot-6, J.R. barely merits a second glance from this crowd not until LeBron descends from on high to reclaim him.

He also once smoked pot during his NFL career. He has admitted it and said it was a mistake, hoping kids could learn from it. Showing that they understand the bigger picture, the NFL Network has decided that this admission from Smith is reason to rescind an offer for Smith to be a broadcaster for the network.

Incidentally, former Vikings quarterback Warren Moon is currently a broadcaster for the NFL Network. You remember Warren Moon; the guy who once beat and choked his wife.

Up In Smoke [Newsday] (second item)
The Robert Smith Foundation [Official Site]
Warren Moon Arrest [Cracksmoker]