NFL Roundup: Daunte's Blues

• If you somehow were able to make an emotionless, painless robot clone of Bea Arthur, and you pounded that clone in the face with a polo mallet for 25 minutes, then slammed that head in a car door 15 times, then severed the head with an exceptionally long and sharp toenail, then put the head in a microwave until it began to bubble up and then finally burst, and then you covered that exploded head with months-old maple syrup and planted it in a field of fire ants ... you'd have an approximate physical manifestation of how Vikings quarterback Daunte Culpepper feels right now. More »