It was at the Reebok party during All-Star Weekend on Friday night in Phoenix, where Cudi (real name Scott Mescudi) was booked to perform. Reportedly, Cudi got into an altercation with Reebok employees who did not want him wearing Jordans on the stage. Cudi became belligerent, the police were called, and a tasering ensued. Although handcuffed, it is not clear whether Cudi was arrested. Allen Iverson also attended the party.

The incident has caught the attention of various rap artists including Talib Kweli.

"Kid Cudi got into an argument because he wanted to perform at a Reebok party with Jordans on and then got tasered by popo," Kweli wrote unmodified on Twitter. Is this true? Arizona police go hard on us, DMX, Tyson, Barkley, Cudi...Kid Cudi REALLY dont like Reeboks, huh? (Talib Kweli's Twitter)

If anyone has further information, Twitter me.

Kid Cudi Tasered, Arrested During Reebok All-Star Weekend Party [Baller Status]
No Competition Message Board

That's right—the charming backyard game that fans have been clamoring for years to finally liven up the tired All-Star festivities has been corrupted before it even happens. Not that anyone should be the least bit surprised, but are they seriously going to make NBA players try and spell Geico on live TV? That should really be its own challenge, right? Will one of the insurance company's Cavemen get a bye into the finals?

In other dribbling news, San Antonio is playing Boston today, but no one cares, because LeBron James and Kobe Bryant will fight for the the MVP Award and the NBA title later. After their dual beatdown of the Knicks this week—a quality challenge for both, of course—they decided to face each other to settle this properly. They are just going to give it to the winner and spare us five months of playoffs, right? That would free up a lot of time for everyone.

So basketball fans can discuss their favorite sport here and if it gets more comments than the NHL post, their sport wins.

NBA Players To Play 'G-E-I-C-O' Not 'H-O-R-S-E' [Sporting News]

It's not an officially sanctioned NBA event, like the Dunk and Three-Point contests, but it will be aired by TNT on the Saturday night before the game. (That's February 14, in case you were wondering.) It will also feature bona fide professional basketball players, although the participants haven't been named yet.

But if you've always wanted to see Tony Parker force Vladimir Radmanović to bounce a free throw off of Ernie Johnson's head, then your prayers have been answered. It also has nothing to do with this video of Kobe Bryant riding a horse, although that seems like it could be fun too.

Horse at NBA All-Star [Inside Hoops]
NBA Adds "Horse" To All-Star Weekend [Sporting News]

"Basketball is basketball."

That's what I kept telling myself on the long drive through the swamplands to New Orleans. I'd be covering the D-League All-Star events in the "Dream Factory" on Friday Night. This was to include a three-point contest, a dunk contest, and most noticeably, a HORSE contest. The word was that this was a test to see if the format was marketable for inclusion in the League's All-Star events next year.

But D-League? I'd seen some of the play, but not enough to really get a feel for the whole league, and not in an All-Star competition. Would this somehow be worse than the actual All-Star events? Would the players have the same level of intensity, just less talent, resulting in a cringe-inducing affair that I would of course have to rip mercilessly? I was hoping for aptitude, not excellence. I was hoping for "king of cool" not "the most amazing thing I've ever seen." I was hoping for anything better than, "that sucked."

And honestly? It was pretty cool.

I could try and make it out to be some sort of jaw-dropping display of unseen talent, under the radar, like the White Stripes playing in your neighbor's basement. Or I could try and make this into some sort of deep struggle, the players all vying for their shot at the big time in front of scouts and coaches. Or I could pull the "dreams" approach and spin it like it had something to do with the players wanting to prove something to themselves and others.

But that, of course, would be bullshit.

It's not to say that there wasn't talent. On the other hand, the entire weekend I was impressed with the flashes of brilliance I saw. Kasib Powell's agility. Jeremy Richardson's stroke. Elton Brown's force, Lance Allred's basketball IQ, and Brent Petway's ability to forcefully throw the ball down through the hoop in what is referred to as a "dunk." And the step above everyone else that Morris Almond has.

But for the most part, it was just a collection of D-League players hanging out and showing off, while trying not to get hurt.

I had a chance to interview a few of the players, and they all had the same thing to say when I asked them if they felt like this was a good opportunity to showcase their talents for scouts, coaches and fans.

"Not so much," they all said. It was mostly jut a chance for them to have fun.

I spoke with Rod Benson ("Boom Tho!") and he summed it up best. The All-Star game is more of a chance for the players to be recognized for their contribution and have some fun than to showcase their talents.

The HORSE Contest

The big draw of Friday night was the HORSE contest. Anything that brings out Abbott, Skeets and Tony Mejia is kind of a big deal in D-League terms. And considering it's been hailed by bloggers as the missing piece of All-Star weekend in the League, it was the biggest D-League event of the weekend.

Your competitors:

Jeremy Richardson: Frequent NBA call-up and leader of D-League in 3-point percentage. Also, leads the league in number of times he's been called up and said "Holy shit, Fabricio Oberto is actually considered a better baller than me. Kill me."

Lance Allred: The All-American hero. Told me before the contest that he was still rehabbing a bone bruise (and he showed it to me!) so he was going in cold. A colleague of mine responded, "Yeah. Bone bruise" and mimed masturbation (and he showed me!). Also, a center and therefore a huge underdog.

Morris Almond: Arguably the best player in the D-League. Arguably the biggest mouth in the D-League. My favorite line from his blog? "It's the D-League... I'm supposed to wreck it." Almond scored 53 points in a game earlier this season, and followed it up by taking home the most D-League groupies ever (1).

Kasib Powell: 20 pts, 6 rebounds per game. Voted Best D-League Website by Ukranian Thunder Whores.

The games were only slated to last five minutes, to make sure they didn't drag on in case they bombed. Good call. If this was a disaster, you want it over with as soon as possible. They used the 24-second clock, which was also pretty smart, since there's nothing funnier than seeing unimpressed professional minor-league basketball players trying to vomit up a shot because they're out of time. Because that's awesome.

You apparently couldn't dunk, but layups were allowed. Probably so the dunk contest would have a point. Unfortunately, the first round abandoned this possibility.

Allred apparently thought it was crappy that no one thought he had a snowball's chance in hell. Because he pretty much wrecked Richardson in the first round. They started out not really knowing what to do, just shooting bank jumpers. The crowd started looking at one another, like "What? Is this it?" Allred did manage to hit an eyes-closed free throw that sealed the deal to advance.

Almond and Powell had no such plans to keep it straight up with jumpers. Off the floor shots, 360 three-pointers, and behind the backboard shots were all a part of their contest. Here was the interesting part. While Allred and Richardson hit more shots, the junkfest was way more entertaining.

The finals was a clash of styles, with Allred's standard bankshot jump shooting versus Amond's flair. While everyone was pulling for the trash-talking Almond, you have to appreciate the way Allred went for the jugular. I asked him afterwards why he was so focused in such ridiculous contest.

"I was nervous, because believe it or not, I have NEVER won any sort of trophy in my entire life! And I finally had a chance to win one, because, I can't retire without some cool trophy to put on my shelf right? I really did want to win, and I was nervous, and I also went in for the kill. But so was Jeremy Richardson. Neither of us were doing any trick shots, and I followed his tone, and when we were done, I kept the same approach and went for the jugular, while Morris, who has an NBA contract, was just having a good time."

So when Allred matched Amond's on one knee layup and knocked him out with a long range bank shot, it was actually the little guy winning, with fundamentals and determination. A much better story than it seemed. Even Allred admitted that he wanted to do a lot more trick shots, but with the injury and how nervous he was, he didn't think of it.

That's pretty much the perfect D-League story, don't you think?

My favorite quotes from the event? Both from the official write-up:

Almond: "Yes, it's embarrassing that I lost to a center, but all white guys are good at H.O.R.S.E. for some reason"

Allred: "Oh, and never leave the white guy open."

The D-League Dunk Contest: Air Georgia Gets Sick

I really wasn't expecting much out of this. One of the primary knocks on D-Leaguers is their lack of size. So I was not expecting this to be the best contest of the night. But then, I always underestimate how entertaining it is to see guys jump really, really high and then scream.

I'd heard rumors about this kid, nicknamed "Air Georgia," Brent Pettway. I saw it in person on Friday when he came away with the win.

There were some problems with the dunk contest. First off, they brought kids out of the audience and sat them with the players. The players then gave the kids the option of one of the dunks. This is bad because it limits what the players can do, and it makes them reveal what they're going to do. Second, the M.C. was about the most annoying human being in the city of New Orleans. That's counting everyone in the celebrity game, all of the performers, Vince Carter and Chris Tucker. He was irritating the players and the crowd.

The good news is that these guys could seriously throw down. Rookie Eric Smith threw down a nasty 360 that I'd take over any of Gay's dunks the following night. Pettway offered up two options. The "A-La-Carter" and the "Dominique Special." The "A-La-Carter" was a takeoff on the arm-through-the-hoop hanging dunk Carter pulled in 2000.

His opponent in the finals was 6'2'' Mike Taylor. Taylor got there with a baseline lob dunk to the other side that was damn impressive.

But in the Finals, Petway killed him. After a massive lob East-Bay Funk dunk, he then place the ball on the ground under the goal, stood, leaned down, then jumped up and dunked it, standing. It wasn't impressive when you watched it. Then you thought about it. And realized how much leg power that took. The man's a freak of nature.

The D-League All-Star Contests weren't as good as the League's, but they did show that the D-League has a ton of talent, and that they're worth watching. It also showed that HORSE can work as an event, and that white people are really good at it.

We come for the NBA D-League All-Star events, we stay for the Celebrity game! In a development that can either be considered a blessing or a horrible, horrible curse, my partner Corn and I were actually around for the celebrity game during the NBA Jam Session Friday Night.

After nabbing our passes, we prayed to God no one would discover we're A. writing for a blog and B. that the blog we're guest writing for is, in the minds of NBA-teat suckling oinker ESPN, The End Of Western Civilization.

As we made our way into the press area, we came to one simple conclusion.

Whoever is in charge of programming the NBA Celebrity Game is a deeply disturbed masochist who is obviously smoking crack cocaine in a room full of ether.

We walked in behind two of the largest human beings we've ever seen, both wearing "Mayweather Promotions" t-shirts. It was like being behind a rhino on two legs.

Corn: "Maybe we should just stay behind these two all weekend. We're safer that way."

As we turned the corner to the media section, it was possibly the most absurd collection of human beings and mascot-type devices we could have imagined. On our right? The ESPN set, with Rick Bucher setting up STAT for a Tarot reading. In case you were wondering how we picked out Bucher, it was pretty easy since the man is NEON FUCKING ORANGE. Amare Stoudemire was next to him, and we couldn't take our eyes off of Bucher since we were worried Amare was going to start melting from the radiation steaming off Bucher.

Milling around the back area was overwhelmingly absurd. On our right we've got Stuart Scott and Chris Paul coming to check in with the DJ of the event. On our left was a group of older women; apparently they would be performing at halftime. These dancers, a take off of the Hornets' Honey Bees, were called the Used-To-Bees. Women, 50 to 80 years old, standing within feet of the greatest basketball players in the world. And Taylor Hicks.

Oh, Taylor Hicks.

We'll admit something. We hate American Idol. With the passion of a thousand Bill Waltons. It is turrrible. But as opposed to most of the participants who were actually trying to act cool, Hicks was over the top ridiculous. He knew he had no place there and reveled in it. The man was wearing his jersey tucked into his shorts, for God's sake. Neyo kept looking at him like he was walking around without pants on. If it seems that we are unnaturally preoccupied with the man, it's just that he was so amazingly out of place, and yet mystifyingly dorky.

We ran into Skeets and instantly he and I had the same assessment:

"Is this not the most bizarre fucking thing you've ever seen?

It would have been one thing just to see Taylor Hicks and Chris Tucker wandering around in jerseys and long shorts among Stephen A. and Shaq. But to see a gigantic Warriors mascot get into a dancing contest with two guys from an internet radio show, to see 60-year-old women in the halftime show, to seeing Stuart Scott chowing down with top-notch chefs while all of this is going on? Too much. Just too much. I was having sensory overload, but not from anything of any importance. It was like getting bombarded with Bugs Bunny cartoons that weren't funny.

I'd love to give you some insight into the game, but to be honest, it was kind of like watching your friends play a pickup game, if your friends all had perfectly styled hair and were absolutely terrible at basketball. There was no defense, sloppy ballhandling, and both teams were shooting about 25 percent, it seemed like. So basically, it was a Bobcats games with Chris Tucker.

Deion Sanders was pretty good, and so was the guy from the Wire. Then they did the moronic in-game trade with T.O. joining the fray, and he killed everyone. We're decided that T.O. could come in and play in the NBA and outperform Jerome James, Tyronn Lue and Jason Collins on any given night. Not individually. Combined. The dunk he threw down was downright nasty.

But on the whole, the entire event was like watching a zebra have sex with a flamingo. Downright confusing. The good news? People loved it. Especially when they brought out the mascots and free stuff. The NBA Celebrity Game. It's fan... yeah, I got nothin'.

• Now you see him, now you don't. Kobe Bryant, appearing in his tenth All-Star game, disappeared after only two minutes and 52 seconds. Mamba sat out the remainder of the game to "rest" his injured right pinkie finger -do injured pinkies get tired? - and I probably would have forgotten he was even there if not for the persistent reminders from Reggie Miller and Doug Collins. When the game got all close and competitive in the fourth quarter, Reggie assured us all that it was "killing" Kobe not to be in the game. However, video footage showed a seemingly happy Bryant laughing and joking around with Steve Nash on the sideline. I guess he was just being brave.

• Strategy and coaching? In an All-Star Game? Doc Rivers decided to neutralize the size of the Western Conference All-Stars by utilizing a small lineup and letting them run their taller-but-slower opponents off the floor. And you know what? It worked! That is, until Byron Scott countered with a small lineup of his own. Wow. I thought All-Star Game Coach was just sort of an honorary position, like porn movie director and the Pope.

• Dwight and LeBron like to share. It seemed like half of the East's points in the second quarter came from Dwight Howard and LeBron feeding alley oops to each other. It was like watching somebody play the All-Star Game in NBA Live.

• Yao Ming: Three-point shooter. Back when he was still making All-Star teams, you could always count on Shaq to hoist up one or two ugly threes. I'm talking Gheorghe Muresan-level ugly. Well, in Shaq's absence, this year's three-point comic relief was provided by Yao Ming, who tossed up two triples, including one step-back-behind-the-line shot from the baseline that sailed right past the basket. Speaking of which...

• Anybody else feel a draft in here? Somebody needs to check the roof of the New Orleans Arena. There must have been some mad winds tearing through that place, because there were several three-point attempts that hit nothing but air. Yao, J-Kidd, LeBron, and Dirk Nowitzki all aired out at least one three-pointer.

• Hey, he's not left-handed, is he? Did you see Rasheed Wallace's face during the introductions? He wouldn't have wanted to be at the game any less if David Stern had asked him to eat a pair of cow's testicles before tipoff. 'Sheed then went out and showed his respect for the competition by putting up three left-handed three-pointers. (He did hit one of them, though.)

• Steve Nash: Poster boy. At one point in the second half, it seemed like the East players were taking turns posterizing Steve Nash. Dwight Howard dunked over him, Dwyane Wade hit a turn-around jumper in his face, LeBron James shot hit a fader over him, and then Ray Allen drove past him and drew a foul. Let's face it, if you didn't score on Steve Nash, your All-Star experience just wasn't complete.

• That's what we call Shaqnosis. What was up with the freethrow shooting? The East shot 42 percent (6-for-14) and the West shot 57 percent (8-for-14). All I know is that it's pretty bad when you can honestly say, "The free throw percentages wouldn't have been any worse if Shaq had played in the game." Even Ray Allen - who's third in the league in freethrow shooting at 91.4 percent - missed two foul shots.

• Take that, Superman. Amare Stoudemire gave this year's Slam Dunk Champion a lesson in superheroics by driving in for a nasty fourth quarter dunk. You know, I think an Amare Stoudemire dunk would kill me. And I mean a literal, physical death. So, you know, I'm sure glad I didn't make the All-Star team this year.

• Is it possible to repossess a nickname? Chauncy Billups hit a jumper with 6:41 left in the fourth to tie the game at 112, and Doug Collins was quick to remind us that Billups is Mr. Big Shot. Of course, Mr. Shot gonked an even bigger three-pointer less than a minute later. On the night, he was 3-for-10 from the field and 0-for-6 from Threeland.

• Look out, Dirk, look ouuuuuuut!! With 59 seconds left and the game tied at 125, LeBron stole the ball from Nowitzki, dribbled downcourt, waded through the entire Western Conference lineup, and then dunked it home while planting a forearm in Dirk's mug (refer to the accompanying graphic). That's what Herr Nowitzki calls "gepoopensheiten."

• Now that's offensive. With 46 seconds left and the East leading by two, Chris Paul set an illegal pick on Ray Allen. And by "illegal pick" I mean he shoved Ray-Ray to the floor. But still, who calls an offensive foul in the final minute of an All-Star game?

• Hey! Don't forget about me! I'm money too! With the East holding onto a precarious two-point lead, Dwyane Wade drove in for a sweet driving layup and got fouled by Brandon Roy. Pookie missed the freethrow, but he made up for it by totally stuffing Nowitzki's three-point attempt at the other end. Yeah, I know; rough night for the reigning league MVP.

• LeBron James: MVPburgler. I'm not saying that LeBron didn't play well enough to deserve the MVP award - King James had 27 points, 8 rebounds, 9 assists, and that sick dunk over Nowitzki - but Ray Allen flat out rescued his team with 14 fourth quarter points, three straight three-pointers in the final three minutes, and a game-high 28 points in the East's 134-128 win over the West. But that's what happens when you let the fans choose the MVP.

• Take note, people. His team lost, and that cost him the MVP award, but Chris Paul (16 points, 14 assists, 4 steals) is really, really good.

If you missed the NBA All-Star Celebrity Game last night, it's probably because you have a life. Here's a quick recap:

Master P: Fat.
Chris Tucker: Unfunny, fat.
Deion Sanders: Still afraid of contact.
Alyssa Milano: Stubbornly giving me boners.
Stephen A. Smith: Yelling on his cell phone while the team he was coaching was trailing in the waning moments.
Antawn Jamison: Very country, enjoys his skrimps and fatback.
Ronald McDonald: Stabbed a jogger and stole the tracksuit.

Ultimately, Terrell Owens showed up and, being the only one with any discernible athletic ability, stole the show with 18 points and won MVP. Did you mention that you won as a team, T.O.?

Thanks to Awful Announcing for the pic.

Of all the contests and rigmarole around the weekend, we still find the 3-point contest the most ridiculous. It requires skill, sure, but it's almost compulsively dull and oddly random. (Remember, the lowest score ever in a 3-point contest was notched by ... Michael Jordan.) Who wouldn't take H-O-R-S-E?

We hope everyone's better behaved than they were in Las Vegas. They have to be, right?

A Celebration Of All Things D-League [Deadspin]

We don't think the D-League gets enough love, and that's not just because they play H-O-R-S-E on their All-Star Weekend. (Though they do.) Or because they have Rod Benson. (Though they have him too.)

Why love the D-League? So many reasons. Hardwood Paroxsym revs up its manifesto:

We're stunned by the disdain many NBA fans have of the D-League. It's WNBA-proportions at times. Now, indifference, that makes sense. Apathy, assuredly. Ignorance, even, is commonplace and to be expected. But there's a legitimate "This is a dumb idea, they should scrap it" flow amongst the fans. Why? There are both theoretical and pragmatic reasons to approach the D-League with open arms.

We're gonna have Hardwood Paroxsym at the D-League All-Star Game this weekend, so expect a full report. We care. We definitely care. Kind of.

Dr. BoomTho, Or: How I Learned To Stop Hating And Love The D-League [Hardwood Paroxysm]

Las Vegas police recovered more than $81,000 in cash from Mitchell's room that investigators believe belonged to Jones. The search warrant also shed light on some missing details about what happened inside the strip club before the 5 a.m. shooting occurred. Cornelius Haynes Jr., better known as the rapper Nelly, and rapper Jermaine Dupri, were also at the club and sitting with Jones's entourage in the VIP section, the warrant stated.

Haynes had tossed hundreds of $1 bills on the stripper stage, an action known in street slang as "making it rain," and Jones joined in. An announcer told all the dancers to go to the center stage, and about 40 strippers soon were on the stage. Mitchell told the strippers from his Houston club to pick up the money, which apparently was only supposed to be used for visual effect, the warrant stated. One of the dancers than took the trash bag filled with Jones' money and a "melee broke out. Jones became irate about the loss of his money, and the fact that girls were in a frenzy, picking up the money at their feet," the warrant stated.

Oh, so this was all about a trash bag with $81,000 in it. THAT should clear everything up.

Warrant Includes Details Of Club Melee, Shootings [Las Vegas Review Journal]
Ghosts Closing In On Pacman Jones [Deadspin]

So here's a fun end-of-day game from The 700 Level: See how many "celebrities" you can spot in the stands of the NBA All-Star Game over the weekend. No bonus points, sadly, for recently conceived fetuses, just the night before, being mainlined Red Bull through umbilical cords.

(For those already found, try this Flickr page.)

OK, now see if you can find the strippers that were bitten and the bouncers shot. There should be plenty of those too.

How Many Celebs Can You Spot? [The 700 Level]

Jones' lawyer Worrick Robinson spoke to the NFL player Monday about his alleged role in the altercation: "I asked him: 'Was anybody in your group involved in the shooting?' And he said, 'No.'"I said, Then why did you leave? He said, 'When there's guns there's always someone else coming with a gun. That's what you do. You get out of there.'" "He told me, 'Man, I am not a suspect and didn't have anything to do with this.'"

Police are still wanting to question Jones, but that might just be police procedure: Whenever there's strip club shooting, anywhere, Pac Man Jones and Stephen Jackson are rounded up, just to cover all one's bases.

Pac Man Jones Denies Involvement In Las Vegas Strip Club Shooting [Sports By Brooks]

"I don't want to see some gangbangers or hip-hoppers knocking over a jewelry store at Fashion Show mall."

Well, Oscar, you old mob lawyer you, you can get back to pitching the league on your city's viability of having its own team, because the "gangbangers" and "hip-hoppers" behaved themselves this weekend: Crime was actually down this weekend from the weekend before. This shouldn't be a surprise; if there were any illegal activity going on, we highly doubt the police would have been able to get past the bouncers.

Las Vegas Police Report Light Criminal Activity During NBA All-Star Week [SportsByBrooks]

(UPDATE: Of course, last night might have been an exception.)

The NBA's All-Star game is, in my opinion, the best in sports. All the guys celebrate the worthlessness of the exhibition by having fun and self-promoting whenever they get the chance. It's certainly a nice contrast to the Pro Bowl, where you can can catch guys sleeping on the sidelines.

Christina Aguilera and Toni Braxton are reponsible for the halftime entertainment, and I think Mary J. Blige will be involved, too. Cirque de Soleil will be involved somehow, and Wayne Newton, whose body will not have to be altered whatsoever by an undertaker when he dies, will do the player introductions.

I'm expecting an ugly, sloppy, low-scoring game, by All-Star standards. There's no Kidd, no Nash, no Iverson... point guards control these things, and there are no point guards to be found this evening. The number of botched alley-oops cound be astronomical.

Las Vegas All-Star 2007 [NBA.com]

Vegas Confidential has learned the 5-foot-7 New York Knicks star was at Western High School's gym Friday practicing a routine in which he leaped over a Playboy Bunny dealer who was seated at a blackjack table. Robinson won the title last year by leaping over Spud Webb, who stood near the freethrow line. But the Bunny stunt won't happen: The Knicks nixed it for safety reasons. A group of baseball players from Western who watched the practice came away with the story of a lifetime.

Safety reasons, my ass. Exactly what could happen here, Nate accidentally teabagging the young lady? Come on. It's not like this girl has never been teabagged before. The man cleared a standing Spud Webb last year, surely he can elevate over a seated trollop.

That's two potentially sweet dunks that were aborted by the NBA. Nate Robinson jumping over some trim, and Dwight Howard dunking on a 12-foot rim. Thanks a lot, NBA. Young Nate's intent, though, is at least enough to get him back in my good graces.

Nate Robinson, a Playboy Bunny, and a Blackjack Table [NBA FanHouse]

There aren't many good reasons not to like Shaq. This was Shaq having fun at the All-Star practice yesterday, forcing LeBron and Dwight Howard to have fun along with him. I realize that Shaq is not everyone's cup of tea, but when he retires, who's going to do stuff like this? It seems like Shaq is making a concerted effort to pass the torch to Dwight Howard this weekend.

Shaq Lebron and Howard Dancing [YouTube]

Hard to call Dick Bavetta a loser, though. He went through it with such good spirit, such class, and outright desire. He's 67 years old, and he willingly made a Pete Rose head first dive on a hardwood floor. Dick Bavetta has balls like iron cantaloupes.

If Bavetta wasn't the loser, though, who was? Naturally, Tim Hardaway. As if the race wasn't enjoyable enough, Bavetta and Barkley kissed afterwards, openly taunting Tim Hardaway.

Elsewhere in All-Star Saturday night competition, some people won the Shooting Stars and Skills Challenges. Agent Zero was destroyed in the three-point shootout by Agent Kapono, who had a near historic run of 24 points in the final round.

And in the dunk contest, Dwight Howard got mugged. For the second straight year, the best dunk of the night was not rewarded. When you can put a sticker on the backboard at 12 feet 6 inches and then dunk, all in one jump... you not only at least deserve a trip to the Finals, you might also be goddamn superhuman. Instead, the finals included Gerald Green and the increasingly annoying Nate Robinson.

I don't have anything against Nate himself, really... but he didn't deserve to win last year, and he didn't deserve to be in the final this year. Gerald Green ended up as your winner, and it's not that he's an unworthy champion... but I just can't get past the Dwight Howard injustice.

THE AMAZING RACE!!!! The Video [Awful Announcing]
We all knew Vegas would be different [The Sports Hernia Blog]
The Charles Barkley vs. Dick Bavetta Wrapup [Complete Sports]

The Deadspin Predictions:

Barkley over Bavetta. It's a straight-line, up and back race. There's not much endurance or agility involved. I don't think Charles would've talked that much noise if he didn't know he could do it.

Arenas in the 3-Point Shootout. It just means more to him than it does to anyone else. If he can beat DeShawn Stevenson with one hand, he can beat the other guys with two.

Dwight Howard in the dunk contest. He's going to do something crazy like jump, eat an entire ear of corn off the top of the backboard, dunk it, and then land.

Kobe Bryant in the Skills Challenge. It's his thing, you know?

Boredom in the Shooting Stars thing. I don't know. Whatever team Magic Johnson is on this year.

NBA All-Star 2007 [NBA.com]