noty Page index.xml - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
ESPN's Adrian Wojnarowski Is Now A Corporate Shill For An NBA Sponsor
Adrian Wojnarowski, ESPN’s most prolific and trusted NBA reporter, is now a brand bot for a company that is partnered with the league he is, in theory, supposed to be covering aggressively and adversarially. ...
<i>Sports Illustrated</i> Bosses Insist To Staff That Being Sold To Necrophilic Brand Enthusiasts Is Good
For 65 years, Sports Illustrated has persisted in narrowly covering sports, neglecting those who would like to, say, have their prostates examined in SI-branded medical clinics by doctors wearing SI-branded lab coats, or drape themselves in SI-branded bikinis, or eat an SI-branded hot dog at their k...
A "Vodka Diet Coke" Is Not A Cocktail
Earlier today, during an interview game of “73 Questions,” a faceless reporter from Vogue asked famous robot Taylor Swift what her favorite cocktail is. The Diet Coke brand ambassador said it’s a “vodka Diet Coke,” which is a drink that can indeed exist by way of mixing the ingredients found in its ...
Presenting The 2016 Name Of The Year Bracket
These are exciting times for Name of the Year....
Presenting Your 2014 Name Of The Year
Shamus Beaglehole has prevailed. Here's to you, Shamus....
Name Of The Year 2014 Final: Shamus Beaglehole Vs. Chillie Poon
This is it. This is the showdown we've waited an entire year for (OK, more like five months). In one corner, we have Shamus Beaglehole: English footballer, #3 seed of the Sithole Regional, vanquisher of Curvaceous Bass and Dr. Loki Skylizard, and bearer of a last name that sounds like an old man's c...
2014 Name Of The Year: The Final Four
We're nearing the summit of this year's tourney, and the venerable spirits of Assumption Bulltron, Godfrey Sithole, Crescent Dragonwagon, and Doby Chrotchtangle have each found favor with a champion. These four, this exalted 16th of the starting field, are all that remain as our competition enters i...
Name Of The Year 2014: The Elite Eight
We're down to just eight splendid name-inees, and we're happy to see each one of them picking up their own fan groups. The comments section has provided a thorough analysis to complement our own, and we hope to see more nuggets of brilliance as we approach the Final Four....
2014 Name Of The Year: The Sweet 16
We had a polling malfunction last week: The Bulltron and Sithole polls inexplicably closed early. Our bad, and thanks for letting us know on Twitter so we could re-open them; we might not have caught the error otherwise....
2014 Name of the Year: Round Two, And A Note On Middle Names
Before we get to the second round of our tournament, I'd like to share a tip we received from a reader named Jeffrey. Jeffrey is not himself a Name of the Year nominee, but he is a Brandeis alum familiar with Mingus Mapps, the Bulltron Regional's 8-seed and a Brandeis poli-sci professor....
2014 Name of the Year: Dragonwagon and Chrotchtangle Regionals, Round 1
We love it when our name-inees display some competitive spirit, so we were thrilled to receive an email in that vein last night from Bulltron competitor Bernie Wagenblast. Here's what he had to say:...
2014 Name Of The Year: Bulltron And Sithole Regionals, Round 1
The 2014 Name of the Year tournament kicks off today in the quadrants named after Assumption Bulltron, crowned the first-ever Name of the Decade, and Godfrey Sithole, the 1985 Name of the Year champion....
Presenting The 2014 Name Of The Year Bracket, A Shitavious Gruntfest
Name of the Year dates to the fall of 1982 and names taped to a dorm-room door on an Ivy campus: Dexter Manley, Cornelius Boza-Edwards, Baskerville Holmes. The following spring, Hector (Macho) Camacho was elected the first Name of the Year. What can we say? The first basketball baskets didn't have h...
Name Of The Year Tournament, The True March Madness, Is Back
Who will inherit the throne of Barkevious Mingo (pictured)? Luminaries such as Lolita Respectnothing, Mister Cobble, and God's Power Offor vie for the title of Name Of The Year. [NOTY]...
Name Of The Year Competition Enters Final Four
Murray State golf coach Velvet Milkman, the No. 8 seed, has somehow upset heavily-favored Uranus Golden and Juvyline Cubangbang to come within two steps of ultimate NOTY glory. [Name Of The Year]...
Get Ready For The Glory And Majesty That Is The 'Name Of The Year' tournament
It's like waking up the morning before the NCAA Basketball Tournament and discovering that your favorite team has lost its eligibility (*cough* Hoosiers! *cough*). That was my reaction when I found out this morning that Brian Suksomwong has been booted from the prestigious Name of the Year competiti...