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Posts Tagged “

Peyton Manning

super bowl xlii

Eli Manning Plays With Your Perceptions Of Reality


As amazing as Eli Manning was last night, it might have behooved someone on the Giants, whether it was a PR person or just an assistant coach, to inform him that when you win the Super Bowl, you're supposed to take your pads off before you put on the championship T-shirt. Doofy fella kept those pads on the whole night. We bet he's still wearing them. More »

cultural oddsmaker

Who Will Be The Next Athlete To Have A Kinky Sex Fetish Revealed?

AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think.

There's something about guys dressing in drag that, for whatever reason, is frowned upon. Oscar De La Hoya could've easily played his kinky fishnet outfit off as a mere lark: he's just a puppy-faced fellow, who after a flight of tequila shots, has no problem dressing up in a giant hairnet and heels. No big deal, really. Everyone's done it before. Sometimes, even the most virile of men cannot resist the temptation to squeeze into something spicy.

The difference between Oscar De La Hoya and most other recreational transsexuals is that they don't deny it. If it's an isolated incident, it's something that's laughed about later and forgotten about quickly. But, De La Hoya's staunch denial about the incident, plus all of those rumored intimidating phone calls to the dim-witted Scores dancer who gave the photos up and the legal threats, suggest that he's hiding a very, very dark secret.

This is where it gets interesting. We all know athletes become much more appealing if they have a little stink on them. Beneath all of that skill, money, fame, it's nice to know there runs a current of torment, a greasy underbelly that has to be concealed for presentation purposes.

There are so many who fit the profile.

So this week, I'm polishing up my ben-wah balls, purchasing a one way ticket to Taiwan and the Mets fucking suck.

Line drive hit to left field...here comes Iguchi!

More »

indianapolis 500

Small Cars Going In Circles, Because Peyton Manning Said They Could

The Indianapolis 500 is underway, and if the fact that I haven't mentioned until over an hour after it started seems to give an indication of my interest level in the race ... it probably does. More »

matt leinart

That's All We Needed Was MORE Paris Hilton Jokes

So that Peyton Manning on SNL appearance that we all liked a little more than we were expecting? Well, turns out the main reason Matt Leinart fired his agents last week is because that wasn't him on the show. More »

nfl

Save LT Before It's Too Late

It won't be long now until they announce who will grace the cover of Madden 2008 — ESPN's quixotic video games section handicaps the contenders here — and as everybody knows, it has pretty much meant doom for whomever is graced with the honor. Marshall Faulk, Daunte Culpepper, Eddie George, Ron Mexico ... the cover has meant nothing but pain. More »

nfl

Peyton Manning Much Funnier Than Anyone Could Have Guessed

MJD mentioned the Peyton Manning-hosted "Saturday Night Live" yesterday, but we finally sat down to watch it today. We have to say: We were actually quite impressed. He's sure as hell a lot funnier than Michael Jordan was on there, and definitely superior to Dane freaking Cook. More »

peyton manning

Your SNL MVP, Peyton Manning

For a variety of reasons, I hadn't watched Saturday Night Live in a while. I considered giving it a go after Justin Timberlake cut a hole in a box, but I never got around to it. Of course, there was no way I was going to miss Peyton Manning hosting, and I was hoping that while I watched, I'd pick up another reason or two to keep watching SNL. More »

college basketball

The Kansas/UCLA Open Thread

Kansas vs. UCLA will be tipping any time now. Hopefully, that one will make this one look like the JV game. There's no shortage of history and tradition there, of course, as will be mentioned during the obligatory shot of Bill Walton in the stands with his tiny Asian wife. More »

nfl

Peyton's Handlers Say He Does This All The Time

Once the "PTI"s and "Around The Horn"s of the world finally got around to noticing Peyton Manning's Sweet 16 party photos yesterday, the folks in Manning's camp had to acknowledge them with the most boring press release paragraph we can remember. More »

nfl

Peyton Manning's Sweet 16 Party Cameo

So, less than a month after you've won the Super Bowl, you've got a bevy of entertainment options and endorsement opportunities. Or, you can just ignore both and sleep on a beach somewhere, maybe make out with balding country music stars your wife, just take it easy. More »

nfl

Hey, Who's Funnier Than Peyton Manning?

You know, when you're talking freewheeling, classic sketch comedy, well, jeez, you're obviously talking about Peyton Manning. More »

nfl

Just What This Guy Needs: Free Stuff

We forget this sometimes, but the winner of the Super Bowl MVP is awarded with a brand new gas-guzzler for peddling their wares on the world's largest stage. Therefore, we have the sublime pleasure of watching a man who makes eight figures a season decided which mammoth Cadillac he'll give to staffer for a Christmas present. This bothers us in a way we can't put our finger on; we liked it better when the celebrities on game shows had to give their winnings to charity. More »

peyton manning

The Bull Dance Was A Nice Touch

I've purposely avoided most of the Super Bowl hype throughout the week... I haven't watched any preview shows, no NFL Matchup type shows, not even SportsCenter. I didn't want to get burned out and head into today's game wishing it was already over. More »

nfl

Heavens, What About Peyton's Carpometacarpal Joint?

You can tell we're just about to turn the corner and start ratcheting up the Super Bowl XXXXI coverage lunacy when the condition of a man's thumb is receiving Zapruder-level scrutiny. Peyton Manning, who has had a seeming otherworldly ability to avoid injuries throughout his career, is playing all coy about the thumb he banged toward the end of the AFC Championship Game. More »

nfl

Peyton Manning, An Image Now In Need Of An Upgrade

A confession to make: We like dynasties. We don't like them because it's fun to watch one team win everything, because it isn't. We like them because they provide clear, distinct rooting interests and fault lines. The Patriots always beat the Colts, Peyton Manning can't figure out the Patriots, one is the smug victor, the other the feeble doomed. We like it when storylines last several years; it feels like we've earned them more. More »

nfl

Hmm ... Whom Do We Dislike More?

Kissing Suzy Kolber tackles a question we've been struggling with ourselves: Whom are we supposed to root against in the AFC Championship Game this weekend? More »

nfl

We Will Never Rid Ourselves Of The Colts

We wrap up our roundup posts of the weekend's games with the most boring game of the weekend: The Colts' dreary win over the Ravens. Despite not having the best game, Peyton Manning was squawking afterwards about not getting respect, or something, but the main thing he did right Saturday was not being Steve McNair. You can say that a game in which the Colts score five field goals without a touchdown is "well-played" and "hard-hitting," but this is the Colts, and we don't believe you. More »

peyton manning

Nothing About This Suggests "Paradise"

If you were undecided about who to root for today... Jesus. More »