From an email:

"cleaning out my old bedroom to prep for my parents moving and i found this huge poster of Phil Simms wearing a bedazzled denim jacket. so i took a picture of it, then used it to line the crate im putting my records in. as useful today as it was in 86."

Blinding...but so cool.

Good morning. It's Wednesday. Hump yourself.

So here's a show we would watch: It turns out that the GEICO Caveman commercials are getting their own television show. We have no problem with this idea; we find the Caveman skits hilarious, particularly the one where he's on the cable news show.

Anyway, here's a clip that's purportedly from the pilot episode, though we think we remember seeing it on the Super Bowl pregame show. It's Phil Simms, playing golf with a Caveman. They must have cut out the part where Phil confesses his ambivalence about his gay son.

Phil Simms Stars In Pilot Of New GEICO Caveman Show [WBRS Sports Blog]

But the kid's got potential, and not just on the field. Kissing Suzy Kolber has found a picture, via Eagles Insider, of young Matt Simms about to roll what seems like some happy greenery for himself. We suppose it's possible that young Matt just enjoys rolling his own cigarettes; if that's the case, we suspect he has the patience and stick-to-it-iveness that is required of a big time quarterback. But we doubt that's the case.

Much credit to KSK, which actually posted this at 4:20 this morning. Now that's devotion to the cause.

America's Most Blunted: They Grow Up So Fast [Kissing Suzy Kolber]
Phil Simms Should Have Had Daughters [With Leather]
We Saw Chris Simms Make A Spinach Dip In A Loaf Of Sourdough Bread Once [Deadspin]

"Tom Brady, he s a handsome dude. He s also fearless and likes the action." The "action" he was describing was Brady running a quarterback sneak into a mass of man flesh.

Simms also goes into a detailed description of Chargers quarterback Drew Brees' pants. As Brick Tamland might say, Simms would like to invite you to the pants party.

Week 4 Notes [Out Sports]
Phil Simms' Homoerotic Comments [Out Sports]

Well, apparently Hochuli spends his off-seasons sitting at home, Googling himself. Witness this post from The World According To TMC, which contains a joke in the headline about Hochuli being on steroids. Three months after the post, Hochuli showed up in the comments — blog writer Tom McAllister confirmed Hochuli's identity by tracing the IP address to the law firm Hochuli works for — and started punching.

It shows how little you know about steroids to suggest that I use them. Anyone with any knowledge could tell by lookiing at me that I don t use anything like that. But you obviously don t concern yourself with the truth. You are only interested in advancing your own interests, even if that means falsely accusing someone of steriod use. I have never used steroids, growth hormones, or anything like them. I work very hard at mainting my physique, and it offends me when someone like you doesn t concern himself with finding the truth. Pretty sad on your part.

In case Hochuli Googles himself again over the next couple of months, let us note now that we do not believe Hochuli is on steroids. We bet he's bald under that little hat, though.

Why Steroids Are Not An Issue In the NFL Unless You Count Ed Hochuli [The World According To TMC]
Homoerotic Comments From Phil Simms [OutSports]