roykeane Page index.xml - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Erling Haaland, Marcus Rashford have rough go of it in wild Premier League weekend
Saturday may have been a routine day in the world’s biggest league, but there must’ve been some sort of gaseous cloud that descended over Ol’ Blighty on Sunday. Other than the one that normally settled over England on Sunday mornings that smells of ale, vomit and some sort of meat (no one’s quite su...
What if Man City have Kevin De Bruyne II, but faster?
Hello again! This is the second iteration of something we’re trying every Monday, wrapping up the Premier League weekend through five things we learned or liked or bothered us or confused us (we’re always confused). Hope you like it, and if you do please share it around to that guy who supports the ...
Happy St. Patrick’s Day! Feast your eyes on some really cool, and really ugly, green uniforms
As everyone knows, the St. Patrick’s Day tradition is to wear green. While Ray Ferraro and the 1989 Hartford Whalers did this for every road game, what can a sports fan pick out of the closet to garner the luck o’ the Irish and avoid the dreaded pinches for those who forget to don the right apparel?...
José Mourinho Doesn't Intend To Stop Being An Asshole Any Time Soon
José Mourinho is feeling himself right now. He has the best team in England, maybe the best in the world, and they're firing on all cylinders. So his typically dismissive response to a recent controversy involving other coaches' not taking too well to his celebratory handshake routine isn't surpri...
Mick McCarthy's Secret To Successfully Managing A Soccer Team: Handshakes
Wolverhampton manager Mick McCarthy has finally revealed the secret to his immense success. Every morning, McCarthy greets his players by firmly pressing his palm meat against their palm meat, curling his fingers around their fingers and ecstatically pumping his hand inside theirs. Over and over. Un...
Roy Keane Does The Celtic Jig
Famed Manchester United Hero-In-Exile Roy Keane has signed with Celtic until 2007, a move that could further signify the end of the Manchester United era. Our soccer expert chimes in with a report:...
Keane Bolts On Man U
For those of you who have your finger on the pulse of such matters, the big shocking news this morning is that Roy Keane — a soccer player so famous that we've heard of him — has left Manchester United — the team where he served as captain — after 12 years with the team. Of course, it's the middle...