Deadspin: tailgating

Baylor Beer Burglar Baffles BBQ Bozos

Dashiell Bennett — Mon, 21 Sep 2009 11:30:00 EDT

Baylor lost to UConn this weekend—yes, football—but the campus isn't really concerned about the Bears' gridiron woes. They'd much rather talk about a girl who might have stolen beer out of some frat guy's cooler while tailgating.

Except they can't talk about it because the thread on the Baylor fan forum discussing the incident—the one that featured pictures of a Coors-filching lass caught in the act, generated eight pages of comments, tens of thousands of hits, and links from Big 12 fans everywhere—has mysteriously disappeared. Just like the beer!

WHAT IS BAYLORFANS.COM HIDING? Why are they protecting this (alleged!) bootlegger? The original thread claimed this still unidentified girl was caught not once, but twice, lifting cold ones from a cooler that did not belong to her. It somehow involves rival tailgate factions and the bad mustaches of the Sig Eps fraternity. Facebook searches have been launched, beer reparations demanded. What would her parents think? What would God think?

(If the allegations are true, she has violated the Christian ethics code of Baylor University! I'm not sure where underage drinking and online shaming fall in that code.)

I think this follow up thread puts things in perspective for us all.

Subject: 30,000 VIEWS?!! Are you kidding me?!
That is awesome. Has to be the greatest thread ever on internet sports message boards. Probably more views that Erin Andrews nude.

Yes. Probably.

Thieves at tailgate - practice fields [BaylorFans.com via Google Cache]
Baylor U. Tailgate Beer Thief Caught In The Act [Brooks]
30,000 VIEWS?!! Are you kidding me?! [Baylor Fans.com]

University Of Minnesota Bans All Your Rowdy Friends

Nash Landesman — Sat, 19 Sep 2009 10:10:55 EDT

It's bad enough that drinking is banned at Minnesota football games —but tailgating too? Those with rowdy reputations must now enter through special gate and get breathalized. Fail, and watch the game from a bar—where at least there's beer. [ESPN]

Ohio State-USC Game A Missed FAILgate Opportunity

Dashiell Bennett — Tue, 15 Sep 2009 10:45:27 EDT

"Ohio State says it has learned its lesson from big matchups such as the Texas game in 2005, in which cleanup crews found several soiled shorts and a few coolers filled with poop." [Columbus Dispatch]

If You Don't Cook Brats, The Terrorists Win

Leitch — Thu, 17 Jan 2008 15:40:25 EST

As mentioned, we're heading to Glendale for the Super Bowl this year — yes, yes, book promotion — and we were looking forward to walking around some of the tailgates beforehand on Super Sunday. But we'd forgotten: They don't allow tailgates at the Super Bowl. A travesty, and now some people are trying to do something about it.

Yes, it's that long lost art: The Internet Petition. Fans are trying to get the NFL to allow tailgating at the Super Bowl this year. We wouldn't hold your breath, were we you.

We, the undersigned, believe this policy to be hypocritical in light of the fact that tailgating is allowed, and highly encouraged, during the entire NFL season leading up to the Super Bowl. Does the NFL expect us to believe that tailgating at the Super Bowl poses a much greater public security risk than the weeks prior? Are we to believe that the threat of terrorism is so great that we are willing to abolish something as uniquely American as tailgating? Tailgating at the Super Bowl should be reinstated to demonstrate to potential terrorists that we will not give into our fear and will not compromise our American way of life.

The last line is our favorite. We imagine a member of Al Qaeda, preparing a full scale attack, seeing shirtless drunk people fighting in a parking lot and thinking to himself, "You know what, guys? I think we're making a mistake. This country, this 'U.S.A.' ... it's all right. It really is. Let's call this off."

Allow Tailgating At The Super Bowl Petition [Petition Online]

I Don't Think This Is What Lil' Jon Had In Mind

mjdeadspin — Sat, 21 Oct 2006 18:12:21 EDT

Illinois, despite holding a second half lead, couldn't hold on to beat Penn State today, but if you're an Illini fan, take heart. At least it wasn't your fans in that video.

26-12, you'll forget about in a week. The guy who comes in at about the 1:05 mark and volunteers himself for the Abu Ghraib photoshoot treatment, however, will be shamed forever.

South Bend's Fell Power to Cause Rhythmless Dancing Confirmed [NCAA FanHouse]