The first idea we had was to recruit some well-known music writers to see what happened to their ear drums after a couple of spins. Craggs had Greil Marcus lined up, but he backed off. Chuck Klosterman was also intrigued by the idea, but was bogged down in other projects.

So, second plan — find a producer to remix one of these McCarver tracks and modernize it a bit. Luckily, a fine gentleman at Sony music answered the call and passed along the McCarverized version of an old Richard Rodgers ditty from 1937 called "I Wish I Were In Love Again" to someone he knew. Here's Tim's version.

Now, here's a remixed version done by an up-and-coming producer from North Carolina named A-Styles, who recently did some tracks for the Ying Yang Twins including this catchy little number called "Wild Out". With his help, he's transformed McCarver's version from dewy swing into dirty souf trip-hop.

Thanks for your continued support of Deadspin. Your editor tomorrow is TBD, for now. Sunday, Barry P.

No more pain.

Video: Mike Byhoff

Yes, it's "Tim McCarver Sings Selections from the Great American Songbook," hitting stores on September 22nd. Rest assured that I've already ordered three copies of this soon-to-be collector's item.

•Thrill to Tim struggling through "This Will Be My Shining Hour!"
•Shed a tear as Tim laments "There Used To Be A Ballpark!"
•Cry like a baby as you listen to "Day By Day," and realize you just listened to 14 songs by Tim McCarver!

Amazon.com currently has no copies in stock, meaning either this album's selling like hotcakes, or more likely, they're not even bothering.

There are currently two reviews on Amazon. The first: "I mute my TV when Tim McCarver is broadcasting a game. Why would I pay to listen to him sing?"

But the second is gold. It's written by either someone so skilled at sarcasm I'm not sure if they're using it, or by Tim McCarver:

I thought Mr. McCarver had reached his apex with his brilliant baseball analysis but I was pleasantly shocked to discover that it pales in comparison to his musical talents. His version of "This Will Be My Shining Hour" is destined to be a classic and would bring even Zeuss himself to tears. My only regret was to discover that this is his only album and since he is getting up there in years it's not likely there will be many more. Bravo Tim!!!

Tim McCarver Sings Selections From The Great American Songbook [Amazon]

Also: Obama supposedly will be in the Fox booth at some point between the third and fifth innings. You know what this means, don't you? What it means is this: Tonight, an American president becomes Joe Buck and Tim McCarver's lucky Pierre. I can't wait.

Barry Petchesky will be around tonight to chronicle Bud Selig's neat little scrimmage. Thanks for your continued support of Deadspin. Keats and Yeats are on your side.

PHOTO: El Duk'

"He was told his investments - made with money he was setting aside for his children and retirement - were tantamount to buying CDs and [safe] bonds," [lawyer Dale] Ledbetter said.

"Tim was very conservative with his money because he grew up not having any," Ledbetter told The Post.

"His dad was a policeman in Memphis and I knew his dad. Tim didn't earn much in his early career playing baseball."

Because the stock market is no better than organized gambling, it's unlikely he'll see much of that money again, but at least he wasn't completely cleaned out. (Maybe he should give Lenny Dykstra a call?) The silver lining in all this is that McCarver is nowhere close to retirement now, so you can expect to see him sitting alongside the animatronic Joe Buck machine at the World Series for many, many, many, many, many years to come.

Tim McCarver: Add Him to the CDO Victim List [In Paulson We Trust]
MCCARVER: I LOST $1M BECAUSE OF MY BROKER'S ERROR [NY Post]

The Philly Inquirer asked McCarver what he thought about Manny's resurgence in blue and the answer was in a word: "despicable." Here we go ...

"I mean, talk about wearing out your welcome in a town, and it was a long welcome with the Red Sox. But some of the things he did were simply despicable, despicable - like not playing, refusing to play. Forgetting what knee to limp on. And now it's washed, it's gone" ...

"A rejuvenated Manny, I think it would be fair to say," McCarver said, sitting in the Phillies dugout yesterday. "More than old Manny. Manny's doing things that even Manny doesn't do, [like] scoring on a double to right field from first base."

McCarver laughed and asked which knee was it that was hurting?

"It's a wonderful story in many, many ways, and from Boston's standpoint, it's a horrible story, I would imagine, because he could be doing that for Boston," McCarver said.

So he's "a real man" then?

You know, I've always sort of liked McCarver, because ... well ... when it comes to color commentary it could be much, much worse. And he maybe has a point, kinda? But he's also an old man and should L.A. win the series, who the hell knows what Manny is capable of? Provided he even realizes that his team is going to the World Series. He may just get in his car, drive to Wasilla and forget the whole thing ever happened. Or McCarver could get swirlied on live TV.

Oh, and thank you, disinterested media for giving us all reasons to care.

• McCarver outspoken about L.A.'s dread man [Philadelphia Inquirer]
• Smoltz recounts Sanders dousing McCarver [SI]

We'd forgotten about the Deion Sanders incident. From Wikipedia:

During the 1992 National League Championship Series, he criticized Deion Sanders for playing both football and baseball on the same day. For his criticism, Sanders dumped a bucket of water on McCarver three times while he was covering the National League pennant winning Atlanta Braves' clubhouse celebration for CBS. Regardless of the criticism he delivered, some also feel that McCarvers's restraint after 3 cold water dumps was exemplary.

Indeed. We also didn't realize that he co-hosted the 1992 Winter Olympics with Paula Zahn. Huh.

Oh, and for playoff's sake: See Fire Joe Morgan.

So: Do you like the Tim McCarver? Do you not like the Tim McCarver? Go go go.

Gawker Media polls require Javascript; if you're viewing this in an RSS reader, click through to view in your Javascript-enabled web browser.

Yes, Tim McCarver actually said this last night:

"You would think that a leadoff walk would lead to more big innings than a leadoff home run. But we've done the research and it turns out that more big innings have come from leadoff home runs than leadoff walks."

Now that's analysis and research! It turns out, too, that McCarver has espoused this wisdom before. He just said it a couple weeks ago, actually. He actually went to STATS, Inc. for this. That must have been an amazing phone call.

Tim McCarver Does Research [Boiled Sports]
Zero > One [Fire Joe Morgan]

Although expected at the party, a casually clad Alex Rodriguez dined at Davio's Saturday night with sportscasters Joe Buck and Tim McCarver.

OK, now there's a conversation of which we'd be eager to read a transcript. We imagine McCarver saying things like, "one of the interesting things restaurants do is give you a basket of bread beforehand," Buck trying to charm the waiter and A-Rod leaving every 15 minutes to go powder his nose.

Big Papi A Big Draw At Four Seasons [Boston.com]

I haven't made fun of Tim McCarver nearly as much I should, recently. I offer this as an apology, and I applaud the Fox network for letting it go. Some other networks seem to have a problem with poking fun at themselves.

The YouTube title, by the way, is "Tim McCarver Flaskback." I think that's a typo, and supposed to be "Flashback," but "Flaskback" also could be appropriate.

Tim McCarver Flaskback [YouTube]

The real news, though is that TBS, your home for "Seinfeld" re-runs and endless showings of Sleepless In Seattle, will show a national Sunday game — it's not known yet whether it will necessitate blackouts the way FOX's Saturday game does — and the first round of playoffs exclusively, starting next year. ESPN is expected to still show some games during the week, and could still take one of the LCS matchups, but baseball will be less of a presence. Let us hope it doesn't cause the network to "forget" about the sport, the way it has about the NHL, not that we have much position to talk in that department.

Does this mean we're going to see more of Don Sutton's silver perm mullet? We hope so.

TBS Drops Braves Games, Joins FOX In TV Deal [USA Today]
New TV Contract [Baseball Musings]

(UPDATE: Apparently Selig plans to do something about the blackout problem. We'll see.)

Well, guess what? The cartoons were just nominated for a Sports Emmy. Yep. In the category of "Outstanding Achievement In Content For Non-Traditional Delivery Platform." Other nominees include ESPN.com's "Off Mikes" and "E Ticket: The Wizard At 95." Honestly? At this rate, that guy below who rapped the Eagles song should be up for one next year.

The other major category? Outstanding Sports Personality: Sports Event Analysts. The nominees? Joe Morgan, Tim McCarver, Troy Aikman, John Madden and Johnny Miller. The Sports Emmys, ladies and gentlemen!

Sport Emmys Nominees [Emmy Online]

You know what? Turns out it was veggie pizza. From Brad Lidge's "Diary Of Dining Delights:"

This was another bad meal in a series of them. I haven t had a truly satisfying lunch in at least a week. Even my soda ($2.95) was lousy. That soda was flatter than a hanging slider on a two-strike count.
The Taste in My Mouth: Schwag.

Brad Lidge's "Diary Of Dining Delights" [Yard Work]
Tim McCarver's Buckner Moment [Deadspin]

FOX's Tim McCarver trounced Dan Marino, Jimmy Johnson, Terry Bradshaw and Billy Packer on his way to the finals, while White Sox shill Hawk "You can put it on the board, YEAH!" Harrelson, somewhat of a surprise finalist, breezed by Seth Davis, Steve Lyons, Magic Johnson and Tony Siragusa. We personally think McCarver's got this one in the bag; right now, fans of all four teams are frantically scouring the Web to see if McCarver and Joe Buck are doing their game, or the other series. (Sorry, White Sox and Angels fans; you're the winners.)

The Road From Bristol [Braves Beat]

We're hoping that somehow this ends up on FOX's Game of the Week coverage this Saturday. We love the idea of Joe Buck and Tim McCarver chuckling uncomfortably, right before McCarver launches into stories of hanging out in the locker room of the 1967 Cardinals, with Mike Shannon, Roger Maris and Dick Groat whipping each other with towels and sucking down some postgame stogies.

The Weekly Dig [Official Site]

Anyway, now that that's done, our intrepid blogger is continuing to tilt at the proverbial windmill: He's set up a bracket for the most loathsome non-ESPN sports personalities. Currently, Steve "Psycho" Lyons is hammering Craig Sager; earlier, Tim McCarver — an early favorite — drilled hapless Dan Marino. Go vote!

The Road From Bristol (NIT Version) [BravesBeat]
The Road From Bristol (Final ESPN Bracket) [Braves Beat] (PDF)