Louisville has run the ball with success as well, but Hunter Cantwell's two interceptions have been drive-killers. The 'Eers lead 35-21 in the fourth quarter. Elsewhere Syracuse and Notre Dame are getting underway in a game that no sane person would ever want to watch. Ohio State is still pissing on the Wolverines and NC State remains poised to play the role of spoiler against their rivals from Chapel Hill. Oh and hey, Tennessee is WINNING a game, and they are pumped!

As usual U of M finds a way to screw over MSU. Most years it's kicking the shit out of them. This year they've decided to continue shitting the bed into the last game of the season against Ohio State, thus depriving MSU of a shot at the Rose Bowl. What a bunch of sore losers. -Ray

The only difference between the Crapple Cup and Cuse-ND: NBC's announcers will keep up the lie that the game is in any way interesting. -Signal2Noise

Michigan's QB got rocked by Laurinaitis, prompting Brad Nessler to remark that he "just got a mouthful of number 33." Ahem. (A "mouthful"? Really, Brad??) -Dexter Fishmore

Ohio State is so happy with what Rich Rodriguez has done with the Michigan program, they're going to have him dot the "i" -Fitz350z

Michigan is less offensive than France's military. -ahp 9

Horrified by the computer generated dancing whales commercial on ABC, I quickly turned to ESPN in hopes of something better. Only I found something worse: scenes from the Kentucky Tattoo Expo, featuring a young yokel with a Colonel Sanders tattoo on his thigh. Why couldn't they have shown Kige Ramsey instead? -sgtabesimpson

Wow. No wonder no one cares about the Ivy League. Harvard 10, Yale 0. Versus is now ready to pull the contract on "The Game". It'll be the first time in their history that they've pulled a contract on anything. -kingdonut66

Six Pabst later and Pam Ward STILL scares the shit out of me. -DannyBoy0268

So Bob Griese thinks Todd Boeckman is of value to the Buckeyes. Well, I have two words for Griese: GET FUCKED. Boeckman was the weak link in that Ohio State offense since 2007, and it was Tressel's loyalty to him that cost the Bucks any shot of winning at Southern Cal. Save your dogfucking QB opinions for your journeyman son. Fuckface. -mmpunter (Ed. note- That's our Punte)

After a 3-0 start, Auburn has lost 3 of 4. The lone victory during this stretch was a 14-12 win over Tennessee. After this win every Auburn fan looked like they'd just witnessed an execution. Since October began Auburn has lost on the road at Vanderbilt for the first time since 1955 (that's before Rosa Parks began the Montgomery bus boycott if you're keeping score) and at home to Arkansas. In between these losses Tommy Tuberville fired offensive coordinator Tony Franklin. As Octobers go Tuberville's ranks right up there with...Bill Stewart's September.

The favored Mountaineers opened up the season with a win over Villanova before getting trounced by East Carolina 24-3. They then went out to Colorado and lost a Thursday night road game. Making West Virginia's quest for 4 consecutive 11 win seasons dead-on-Stewart-arrival. New head coach Bill Stewart was burned and hanged in the streets of Morgantown. And if you live in West Virgina and witnessed one of these mock executions, admit it, you went home and turned on the news to make sure Stewart was being burned and hanged in effigy and not in reality. Since these tumultuous hangings and burnings West Virginia has run off three straight home wins over Syracuse, Rutgers, and Marshall. Mountaineer fans remain unmoved.

What's going to decide this game? Can Auburn's defensive line stifle the West Virginia running game. Pat White's only thrown for 590 yards, but he's finally healthy. But Auburn's first year defensive coordinator, Paul Rhoads, is heading back to the scene of his BCS crime last year, when his Pittsburgh defense knocked West Virginia out of the national championship game. No matter what happens it seems likely that at some point one of these teams will score a touchdown. If either team can manage, be still my beating heart, two touchdowns, then an offensive explosion has occurred. Don't believe me? The over/under on this game is 38. And you should take the under.

Back in August this looked like a huge mid-season out-of-conference match-up of top 10 teams from the Big East and the SEC. Now? Now, it just looks like a fist fight between two fat girls over the grease left over in the corn on the cob tray.

But, before we get to the weekend's six most interesting games, a bit more on USC-Oregon State. I hope you got a chance to watch. Thank God for Thursday night football. Otherwise this game would have kicked off on whatever crappy Fox affiliate carries the game, you'd have seen a score update sometime around 11 and started madly flipping through your cable channels to find out whether or not you even got the game. Only to find out that you don't get the station. Or if you did get it, you'd already be out the bar wallowing in your own team's loss or celebrating their victory. Thanks to the Thursday broadcast we at least had the opportunity to watch what went down.

Games like this are what make college football the most unpredictable sport in America. Oregon State was a 25 point underdog. In the entire NFL season there won't be a 25 point underdog. The crowd was out of control, Oregon State got a couple of good breaks (a would-be interception turns into a touchdown pass with four seconds left in the first half?) and USC proves their mortal.

Why do I enjoy watching and writing so much about college football? For the way momentum takes over the game. College players are held sway by the powers of their emotions much more than professional players. And a huge part of that is college crowds. Did you see how crazy the Oregon State students were? It was a mosh pit that featured a football game. There's a purity to this sporting emotion, a fullness to the hate. I firmly believe that Oregon State students hate USC. Their perceived arrogance, their perfect tans, their sunglasses, their fake breasts, their jock-itch, their Song Girls, and their constant ESPN-fellation. So much distate is manufactured for public consumption these days that I just don't believe most of it. When it comes to college games, I believe it.

It's rare that I watch a sporting event featuring teams I don't care about and think, "Man, I wish I was there." Last night I wished I was in Corvallis, Oregon. Corvallis. Forget pointing to Corvallis, I couldn't even point to the correct region on a map of Oregon. And neither could you. But last night, I wish I was there. And so do you. Anyway, here's your primer on the six most intriguing games of the weekend

UConn at Louisville (-2.5)- Apologies to the UConn fans who have been emailing asking how I haven't noted UConn's inexorable rise to Big East dominance. UConn's 4-0 but looked bad against Baylor last week. Louisville is 2-1 since their debacle at home against Kentucky. Why is this game worth watching? Because the line jumped out at me and because last year's game featured that immortal called fair-catch that turned into a punt return touchdown. This play was the difference for last year's UConn win. Anyway, this is another strange UConn line. Louisville is favored even though they haven't done much of anything this season. Does UConn have the strangest lines of any team so far this season? I think so.

Arkansas at Texas (-27)- Arkansas fans are sitting in their outhouses, tearing pages off the old Sears and Roebuck catalogs repeating over and over again, "Bobby Petrino is an offensive genius," "Bobby Petrino is an offensive genius,", "Bobby Petrino is an offensive genius." Which makes them all sort of sound like elementary school kids saying they don't believe in the Bell Witch while they turn around in circles in front of a mirror. (Did people only do this in the South?) The theory was that a reflection of the Bell Witch would appear in the mirror. Anyway, what do both of these scenerios have in common? Merely saying the same thing over and over again, doesn't make it so. Arkansas is the worst team in the SEC by a wide margin. Should be some fireworks. Unfortunately for Arkansas, they couldn't refuse to reschedule this game after Ike.

Marshall at West Virginia (-15)- If Bill Stewart found a way to lose this game would he survive the night in Morgantown/Deadwood? I don't think so. What's more, I think it would turn into one of those The Wire-esque murders where everyone in the whole stadium knew what happened, why it happened, and who the shooter was but no one would talk. Come Sunday morning a few weary souls just trudge up the muddy hillside overlooking town and pound in an old wooden cross, say a few words ("A lifetime ago, Bill Stewart beat Oklahoma. Them was the days.") and life moves on. But, surely, surely, Bill Stewart isn't going to follow up road losses to East Carolina and Colorado with a home loss to Marshall, right? West Virginia fans would respond if they weren't so busy digging out their end-times shelter and restocking it with pork and beans.

Tennessee at Auburn (-6.5)- The reason I'm in Birmingham is to head over to this game. Going to Tennessee games is becoming like Chinese water torture. You know the drip of watery failure is coming, you're just not sure when. Will my team fumble inside the five, get a punt blocked for a touchdown or allow a punt-return for a touchdown, false start on a key third down play or jump offsides on a key third down play, there are so many questions and so few answers. Having said all that, anyone who has a clue what's going to happen in this game is a fool. The only certainty is it's going to be like two bingo winged Florida chicks kissing, painful yet you cannot look away. True story, former Auburn offensive coordinator Al Borges was at last week's LSU game and sat in the stands quizzically staring down at the field. Thinking, "You fired me for this?"

Wisconsin (-6) at Michigan- Michigan and Tennessee's lockstop of college football awkwardness continues for yet another season. These programs are mirror images of one another. As I've said before, Michigan and Tennessee are to college football what dry humping is to sex. Both teams get you worked up and excited and then, inevitably, let you down and leave you chafed. There's a really good double entendre here with the spread offense but I'm just not seeing it. Anyway, Wisconsin is the last, greatest hope of the Big Ten not named Terrelle Pryor.

At some point Michigan has to recognize that their defense isn't that bad and stop forcing the offense to give away points running an ill-suited scheme, right? Just to keep the games close. Probably not, but they should. If you're a Wisconsin fan this line being so low is a bit alarming. You're having your best season in a decade, Michigan is having their worst, and Michigan is still only a six point underdog?

Alabama at Georgia (-6.5)- Georgia fraternity guy riding through campus in his Toyota 4-Runner discussing the game: "Oh My Fucking God, Georgia is wearing black! Woof, woof! Oh My Fucking God, Georgia is wearing black! Woof, woof. Turn up the Dave Matthews, dude. Oh My Fucking God, Georgia is wearing black!"

Did you hear that Georgia is wearing black jerseys? That's huge. They're having a blackout. Which is different than keeping black's out of the game. That would limit the offensive explosiveness. Hopefully no one makes the latter mistake in a show of excessive blackout glee.

Without a doubt this is Saturday's best game. If Georgia wins they're number one in the country, if Alabama wins do they have a legit argument that they should be number one in the country? Maybe. But, remember, Alabama's strength coach thinks Georgia's wearing black because they're going to a fucking funeral.

(It's at the 1:04 mark and is kind of hard to hear. Not so hard to hear that Mark Richt hasn't run with this and been appearing dressed entirely in black for his press conferences.)

Strength coaches are the craziest bastards connected to sports. Seriously, they are. Usually you don't get to hear what they say because it's so graphic even 18 year old football players are like, "Man, I don't think he should have said that."

a. Guard Ramon Foster picks up his arm to turn around and try to hear what audible Jonathan Crompton is calling. My best guess as to this audible? Watch me throw it really hard into the ground.

b. Tennessee kicks to Brandon James allowing him to return a punt for a touchdown against us for the third consecutive season. (The 2006 return was negated by a phantom block in the back call). Think about how amazing this is. Next year he’s going to become the first player in history to return a punt for a touchdown in four consecutive seasons.

c. Jonathan Crompton decides to run for it on 3rd and 21 after facing modest pressure.

d. Despite there being no one lined up over the center (meaning even I could have scored from one yard out on the quarterback sneak) Crompton goes play-action.

e. The Arian Foster fumble montage aired by CBS. I got more emails about this than anything.

Also, after his third quarter touchdown to Percy Harvin, Florida had outscored UT 58-0 since the third quarter of last year's game. And I'd seen all those points in person. This is no rivalry anymore. Here’s a round-up of 11 other notable things in college football this week after the jump:

1. Scene: Knoxville bar on Thursday night. Guy in West Virginia baseball cap has his back turned to the game during overtime of the Colorado game that his team would lose 17-14. Leaving aside the questionable decision to roll solo to a bar for a game night, how are you actually clad in team gear and not watching while your team is in overtime? Anyway, good hire on Bill Stewart. The guy knows his clapping.

2. The Terrelle Pryor Experience has officially begun. Four touchdown passes and 66 yards running in the 28-10 win over Troy. Are Ohio State fans starting to do the BCS math on 11-1? Former starting quarterback Todd Boeckman ran two plays and was booed mercilessly by the crowd. Prompting this response from defensive lineman Lawrence Wilson:"Hey, we're just kids. We're not professionals. There's no way that adults should treat us that way." News flash, you’re also adults. People younger than you get killed in Iraq every day. But at least no one boos them.

3. Wake Forest over Florida State for the third consecutive year. Third. Think about this, prior to the 2006 season what odds could you have gotten that Wake was going to be beat FSU three times in a row (and twice at Doak-Campbell)? Would there have even been a line? What if you’d shown up at a Vegas casino with a truck of cash and asked them to come up with the odds for you? You’d own the Strip now. In other news, FSU still sucks at quarterback. This level of futility is mind-boggling. Year after year FSU knows they suck at quarterback, everyone (including dozens of blue-chip quarterbacks) know they suck at quarterback, and yet nothing is changing. Chris Weinke is going to end up with a bronze statue outside the stadium soon.

4. Charlie Weis and Notre Dame took a beating from Michigan State. In the process, the horribly named Laptopgate arose because Notre Dame had a laptop in the press box. Fortunately Charlie Weis shot down the problems with that. "The last thing I ever want to do is lie," he told the AP. Of course, why would we ever think otherwise?

5. Vandy is in the top 25 for the first time since 1984 after a 20-17 road win over Ole Miss. No one saw this game because it wasn’t televised anywhere but it featured the inexplicable (a fumble into the end zone as Ole Miss prepared to score and take the lead), as well as four picks from Jevan Snead and a winning team that put up half the offensive output as the losing team. Regardless, the Vandy win has some Auburn fans saying they’re more scored of the ‘Dores in two weeks than they are UT next week. This is ominous. What’s best of all for Vandy about the timing of their ranking? They have a bye week this week so they’ll be ranked for two consecutive weeks. Meaning they’ll set a new record since the 1984 ranking only lasted for a single week. There hasn't been partying like this on campus since the AP test results came back. A 4 in English Composition. Score!

6. Miami stomped Texas A&M 41-23. Admit it, you didn’t know this game was happening either, did you? Miami is still floating under the radar, but I think there’s a decent argument to be made that Randy Shannon has got them on the way back up. As for A&M? Wow. Things aren’t turning so quick. Maybe that two-day coaching search was a bit abrupt?

7. Oregon goes down to Boise State 37-32 meaning USC is already the only remaining unbeaten Pac-10 team. I have lots of Pac-10 readers at Oregon. This makes perfect sense. So, soon after Brandon James’ punt-return for a touchdown, I get this text message, “It could be worse, you could be losing to Boise State.” I think my situation is worse. I’d rather lose to Boise State once than have Brandon James return a punt for a touchdown against my team for the third consecutive year.

8. UCLA’s continuing demise. For two weeks the question was whether UCLA was good or UT was bad. The latter has been confirmed. Since the UT win UCLA has been outscored 90-10: 59-0 by BYU and 31-10 by Arizona. This means UCLA is almost more painful than the Florida loss. Almost.

9. The Big 12’s top teams continue to avoid one another and all remain in the top 10. Texas Tech puts on a 56-14 beat down of UMass. (This would have been a better basketball game. Maybe.) Texas beats Rice 52-10, Missouri beats Buffalo 42-21, and Oklahoma has a bye week. In the Missouri game Chase Daniel completed 20 straight en route to 439 yards passing. Yet, every time I see him, Daniel looks fatter. You too, right? He’s definitely gorging on giant drum sticks. I picture him living in an old house off campus with only one large room. It’s just got a giant chair-throne in the shape of an M that also doubles as a bed. He has a remote control that raises him up to eat and then lowers him back down when the groupies arrive to service him. Occasionally he has sex while eating the giant drum stick.

So it’s probably fortunate that Missouri doesn’t get Oklahoma or Texas Tech on the regular season schedule this year. If they can both get past the Texas game (Oklahoma also gets Texas Tech), it really looks like a Big 12 title game between Missouri and Oklahoma could be a match-up of undefeated teams. At least the Big 12 has a title game. If this was the Big Ten and the teams didn’t play we’d all be subjected to a month’s worth of Herbstreit telling us why the two teams should be given co-national titles without playing.

10.The best game of the day was LSU-Auburn. LSU comes from down 14-3 at the half to win 26-21 on the road against one of the best defenses in the country. Meaning that, at times, it remains more important to have a confident coach than an intelligent coach. Credit to Les Miles for dialing up the trick play score and the ballsy (as if that’s a surprise by now) late touchdown pass on the final drive (although not nearly as late this year).

Question for ESPN: Why did we need shot after shot of a clearly disoriented Andrew Hatch on the sideline? Yeah, it sucks he had a concussion, but this was borderline making fun of his injury. Imagine if someone had a hurt knee, would they keep showing him sitting on crutches while making fun of the fact that his leg wasn’t working? Why do that with Hatch when a head injury is clearly much more dangerous than a leg or arm injury would be?

Credit to redshirt freshman Jarrett Lee bouncing back from the worst interception of the year to lead LSU on the comeback. After he threw the first pick, there was zero faith among LSU fans that he could seal the deal after the Hatch injury. Well done by Lee. I can’t help but think that Miles being insanely confident rubs off on his team. Sometimes insane confidence is better than intelligence. Just ask George W. Bush.

11. There are six non-BCS teams ranked in the top 25. Three from the Mountain West (BYU, Utah, and TCU.) If anyone but USC wins the Pac-10, the Mountain West should take out a newspaper ad on the west coast and proclaim their top team the Pac-10 champion as well. East Carolina hung in despite finding a way to lose to N.C. State and Boise State joined Fresno State, who survived after their crazy overtime win, in the top 25.

1. ESPN's love affair with Tim Tebow is well established. Hell, America's love affair with Tim Tebow is well established. But, even still, did Gameday really need to bring us multiple segments featuring a shirtless Tim Tebow working out? I didn't think the day would ever come where I'd want more footage of Tebow performing circumcisions but, yeah, it did. It's time Vegas starts offering odds on what Tim Tebow's dark side actually is. I'm convinced it's something seismic. Like ESPN is going to do a story from Tebow's apartment where a shirtless Tebow will be reclining on his couch when suddenly 28 little naked Filipino boys keep walking into the room. Speaking of which, how overwhelming was the sexual tension when Erin Andrews interviewed Tebow after the game. Like televised viagra. Is ESPN going to have to pull Andrews off Gator games soon?

2. When did Houston Nutt get fat? The guy has put on about 20 pounds since he joined Ole Miss. Is this because he's not sending as many text messages to hot reporters now? Or does expecting to get fired burn many more calories than having job security? Also, starting quarterback Jevan Snead is white? I'm going to have to really reconsider how many third down conversions he's picking up when the pocket crumbles.

3. Riley Skinner and Sam Swank are Wake Forest football stars. They also have the greatest gay porn names this side of Vince Young. What's the over/under on number of inappropriate posters that are getting confiscated at rival ACC stadiums connected to Skinner's naked photos? Better question, name a BCS team that you would eliminate from contention to win the ACC this year. There isn't one. Vanderbilt would have a chance to win the ACC this year. Seriously, they would.

4. The Bill Stewart honeymoon is over; The Skip Holtz derby is going to be fascinating. Couple of questions about this game. First, what percentage of people turned on West Virginia at ECU and said, "Why is West Virginia playing at ECU?" Any college football fan with a pulse is the answer. This still makes no sense to me. Second, how many more awkward Lou Holtz and Skip Holtz interviews are we going to be subjected to? This thing made The Hills look inspired and fresh. Finally, in the wake of the latest double-digit underdog loss, I'm picturing bodies stacked like cordwood in the ditches surrounding Morgantown/Deadwood. All day Monday there are funeral processions marching up the hills which will end in a wooden cross being stabbed into the bare dirt. Then no one will ever question what happened to the dead. Which reminds me, who made the decision to cut Deadwood yet greenlit an HBO show about southern vampires? Meanwhile, right now, some poor fan base is going to pay Skip Holtz millions of dollars a year to take over their football program after this season. Tough luck.

(This man above will break your spirits. Eventually. But at least his nipples will be as sharp as razors.)

5. Jake Locker has to be the most frustrating quarterback in the country to coach. You have zero clue what he's going to do from one play to the next. His performance on the final drive of the game crystallized this fact. On three consecutive downs he missed wide open receivers. Leading a Utah native I was watching the game with to say, "See, this is when starting white cornerbacks starts to catch up with BYU." Then on 4th and 10 he drops back to pass and rushes for ten yards for the first down. Then, you've all seen it, he scores with 2 seconds left and promptly gets flagged for tossing the ball over his head. What I love about this is how everyone immediately rushes to the rule book to confirm that by rule this is excessive celebration. No shit.

But referees aren't hired to merely enforce the rules without any self-awareness. If they were every college football coach in America would be kicked out of the game for entering the field and arguing a call. What we ask referees to do is show discretion in applying the rules. Consider the situation, consider the intent, and consider the implications of your call. And the ref showed none in this case. Making a call like this isn't unheard of. The same thing happened to Vanderbilt against Florida in the 2005 season. Vandy scored to tie the game and their receiver did a shimmy of sorts. He was immediately flagged and Vandy had to make the ensuing extra point from a great distance. Vandy's coach said they would have gone for 2 and the win rather than play for overtime.

Finally, on Locker, whoever was calling the game for Fox Sports said that Locker would be the best running back in the Pac-10 if he played running back instead of quarterback. This is an insanely stupid comment, right? I'm not an expert on Pac 10 football but this can't possibly be the case.

6. Ohio State survived against mighty Ohio. Yeah, yeah. Is there any college football fan in the country who doesn't root for Ohio State that doesn't want USC to beat them 50-3? That was a couple of double negatives there and might have gotten confusing. Rephrased, unless you're a Buckeye fan the entire country wants to see you utterly destroyed come this weekend. Also, after the game we're traveling to the state and stealing all of your attractive women. All 14 of them.

7. What's up with Jimmy Clausen's hair? He looks like a lame French bus boy from 1963. "Quelle horreur, le JFK!" Was this a penalty for losing the Beer Olympics? Or is he just trying to enjoy having hair before the Clausen genes click in an he follows in the footsteps of Rick and Casey and loses his blond hair? I'm going with the latter. Nice win for the Irish hanging with the plucky San Diego State team that lost to a Div. II school last week. Great moxie. Put them in the top 25.

8. Can we get a referendum on no one else being allowed to be referred to as Tim Tebow-esque? Dave Rowe (who has moved from JP/LF/Raycom to Fox Sports; did he see the ax coming?) constantly referred to Central Michigan quarterback Dan LeFevour as Tim Tebow-esque. Same thing with Jake Locker. As much as I hate the Gators, find another comparison. LeFevour is Jonathan Crompton-esque at best.

9. Did you see Randy Shannon's reaction when Urban Meyer kicked the field goal to cover the spread—this made the score 26-3 and covered the 22 point spread— late on Saturday night? Shannon was cursing Meyer to the high heavens. Which led to the shortest post-game handshake between the two men this side of Bill Belichick. Also, Gators fans, back me up on this, leaving Tebow in until the end of the game was incredibly stupid, right? Why is Meyer doing this? What's more, why is he dropping Tebow back to pass with a unassailable lead and less than five minutes to play? Especially when Tebow had been decked a ton of times in this game. Miami's defensive line absolutely dominated Florida's offensive line for about 50 minutes of the game. Steve Spurrier used to catch an awful lot of crap for running up the score but Meyer does it more than any coach I've seen of late. Of course this might be because Steve Spurrier's teams can't score anymore, but, still, there were lots of Gator fans pissed that Tebow was still in the game, right?

10. I just finished Wille Morris's book, The Courting of Marcus Dupree. It's an amazing book that tells the story of Marcus Dupree, the top recruit of the 1982 football class who happens to be from Philadelphia, Mississippi—the town made infamous by the murder of the three Civil Rights workers in 1964. The book is over 25 years old but is one of the best sports books I've ever read. Insightful, compelling, and if you're like me and had never heard of Marcus Dupree before, incredibly compelling. Fairly often people email me wanting tips on sports books to read. Read this book. I sort of feel like LeVar Burton now.

11. And, lest we end with the literary, Central Florida fans threatened to kill Matt Grothe's father after they got ahold of his cell phone number. Meaning Grothe's father was under police protection for the entire game between South Florida and Central Florida. Ahh, college, such sweet and harmless prankery.

We're rolling through the Top 25 and getting ever closer to kickoff. Just one week from today. John Radcliff brings the West Virginia preview. John blogs about West Virginia at Mountain Lair and writes for FanHouse.

Strengths

Guns and Moonshine are plentiful, and the mountains create a natural barrier against invaders. Oh, football strengths? Guns and Moonshine are plentiful, and that gives opposing fans and teams an uneasy feeling from the moment they enter the state until the moment they leave. We’re $4 million richer! Most of the dead weight is gone from last years coaching staff, but we really wish we could have kept Barwis. You laugh, but Mr. Rogers accepted a modest salary to ensure a significant upgrade at every assistant coaching position. He may not be the sharpest tool in the shed, but he’s smart enough to know he’s not the brains of the operation. And he’s smart enough to know that bubble screens = fail. Something DickRod couldn’t wrap his rather large noggin around. And yeah, Pat White, Noel Devine, most of the receiving corps, and the five starting offensive linemen return. We also have a linebacker named John Holmes that is rather skilled at plugging holes. And South Florida comes to Morgantown in December this year, where it will be cold and miserable and they will not have a snowball’s chance in hell of winning.

Weaknesses

Whiskey, ATV’s, MILF’s, and 28 point spreads. Sadly, Owen Schmitt has left the building. Instead of retiring his number, we retired the fullback position. Seriously, we’ve gone to the H-back. Because after him, what’s the point? Also lost to graduation were 4 of our 5 starting defensive backs. Receiver Darius Reynaud and Defensive End Johnny Dingle left early so they could go undrafted and shine on someone’s practice squad for a couple years until the truth sets in. Why this matters to you? No more Dingle-Berry pictures. So if you want a weakness for this year’s team, it will be the defense.

Rivalry

Among older Mountaineer fans the saying goes, “Penn St. sucks, but Pitt swallows.” Sadly, Penn St. isn’t on the schedule anymore. You can point at the heated series that has developed between West Virginia and Louisville, or the fact that South Florida is the only Big East team with a winning record against the Mountaineers since the new Big East took shape. But neither of those are a drop in the bucket compared to the ocean of hate we have for Pitt. In a sense, Penn St. leaving for the Big 11 10 helped make this rivalry what it is today. Without an instate rival, both Pitt and West Virginia are free to direct their hatred at each other 365 days a year (yes Marshall, you suck so bad you can only be mentioned in parentheses). The leader of the hate squad for West Virginia always has been and always will be the Voice of the Mountaineer and the Pittsburg Steelers, Jack Fleming. You hear his voice every time you see a video of the Immaculate Reception. Like most West Virginia fans, Fleming was brought up to hate Pitt.

"Jack Fleming's house was above the old stadium," Cook continued. "He told me, when he was a child, Pitt would come out on the field, and he would sit on his mother's lap. His mother would point down at them. And his mother would say, 'Son, that's Pitt. You hate Pitt now. You hate Pitt tomorrow. You hate Pitt until the day you die. After that, you will hate Pitt for eternity.' "

As for Pitt, I don’t know and I don’t care. He’s from Pitt and he swallows. That’s all you really need to know.

Usually nothing that interesting happens at media days. Sometimes players like Kentucky's Dicky Lyons confess to having dreams about other quarterbacks in the league. A subpoena gets tossed here and there. And, you know, occasionally a top Heisman candidate like Pat White says West Virginia's baseball coach is a racist. Uh oh.

New football coach Bill Stewart said that White wasn't playing baseball because he couldn't hit the curve ball. White's rationale was a bit different. As reported by the Charleston Daily Mail:

"In my knowledge of West Virginia baseball, there's not been many players of my race on his team," White said. "He's not too high on it."

The he in question was WVU baseball coach Greg Van Zant. The state of West Virginia will now self destruct in... Oh, hell. Never mind. Within a few hours White will clarify his remarks and explain that by "players of my race" White meant "black quarterbacks on the football team." Maybe that line won't work so well either. Anyway, I hesitate to mention it, but once again this quote didn't come from Morgantown/Deadwood.

Pat White put off by the fact that WVU baseball team has no blacks [Charleston Daily Mail]

Pat White drops a bomb instead of throwing one [Dodds and Ends]

It's almost as if Bob Huggins doesn't have control of his players. Even when they're at Pittsburgh Pirates-Colorado Rockies baseball games. Hey, if you can't get drunk and fight at a baseball game what kind of country do we live in? Joe Mazzula and Cameron Thoroughman face several charges. Cue the AP:

Mazzulla, a 6-foot-2 junior from Johnston, R.I., was charged with aggravated assault, hindering apprehension and underage drinking. Thoroughman, a 6-foot-7 sophomore from Portsmouth, Ohio, was charged with disorderly conduct, resisting arrest and underage drinking.

The 20-year-old players began arguing with police when they refused a request for identification, according to a criminal complaint. The officers said the two smelled of alcohol.

Has anything good ever come from refusing to provide identification to police? At least they didn't get tased. Although, to be fair, how much does it suck to be the guys who get asked for ID after they've already been drinking at the baseball game? Yep, two more West Virginia athletes go down outside the city limits Morgantown. Which lends further credence to my hypothesis, formed via Chris Henry and Pacman Jones, that Morgantown is an entirely lawless society. Like Deadwood only minus the warped justice of Swearengen.

Players face charges of underage drinking, resisting arrest [ESPN]

Moss is the third West Virginian sportshuman to be honored, after Jerry West and Mary Lou Retton, both of whom are comparable to Randy Moss is every way.

"Randy Moss is to football what Tiger Woods is to golf," said District Manager Karen Schenck, who will make a presentation to Moss. "The Postal Service wanted to honor Mr. Moss, so we designed a commemorative envelope as a fitting tribute to his many talents."

Personally, we can't believe they've ignored a true champion of West Virginia sports: Pittsnogle!

Now You Can Lick Randy Moss [Lion In Oil]

In its ongoing search for Rich Rodriguez's successor as head football coach, West Virginia is extending the scope to include its intellectual superiors: 12-year-olds, dude. Yes, wee Joshua Irizarry - of the Connecticut Irizarrys - sent an application and the school took him semi-kinda-jokingly-seriously. Well, they didn't immediately throw it away at least. And hey, he's been a Mountaineers fan since he was 4, which was... not that long ago.

Insisting it was "a completely serious offer," the Connecticut boy outlined his skills in a letter to WVU President Mike Garrison when the job opened up in December. They included "making up new plays to fool defenses in local sandlot games."

Is that what they're calling the Big East these days? HEY-O!

And he showed a knack for public relations: "Consider the publicity your campus would receive," he wrote. "I understand this would be a move more suited for a team like Temple, but I am just asking for your consideration."

"Don't think of this as hiring a 12-year-old kid from a nowhere town, but think of this as hiring a dedicated football mind trying to help a team," he pleaded. "I would work for any conditions you would wish to provide."

In the end, Garrison settled for what he assured the boy was "an equally qualified candidate" to succeed Rich Rodriguez, who quit in December for the same post at Michigan. Former WVU assistant coach Bill Stewart now holds the title.

See, that's where you screwed up, kid. This is West Fucking Virginia. They need to know how well you chuck a battery. But maybe you'll get that Temple job yet.

From The Hive.com:

Since 1974 (thanks Dad!) I have attended Georgia Tech football games as a fan, student, and then alumni. Over the years, I have witnessed odd behavior at college football events. Until New Year's Day 2007, the event that stood out most was when the Georgia Tech student section covered the Notre Dame Team with raw fish in the late 70's.

After the Gator Bowl? Wow. Just wow.

I always carry my camera to Georgia Tech football games. We were fortunate and had seats on the lower level, two seats away from the Georgia Tech Band section. At the end of the second quarter, the band was in position on the field, leaving their section empty. I walked to the bottom of the band section to get some panorama shots of the stadium and then returned to my seat. I noticed a West Virginia fan standing in the middle of the Georgia Tech Band seating area, with his pants around his knees.

As this is unusual, I pointed the walking stereotype to my fiance', a Virginia Tech alumni. She had been preparing me for the encounters with West Virginia fans and this individual only supported her prior observations.

Then things got ugly.

The WVU fan then dropped his drawers and defecated on one of the Georgia Tech band section seats.

Gator Bowl Disrespect for GT Band [The Hive]