•Dear Texans fans: What the fuck? It would be wrong to paint an entire fanbase with the same brush as the twisted mind who created this...companion, but, yeah, that's pretty much what I'm gonna do.

•A real, practicing judge took the time to rule the Happy Gilmore running swing illegal in the province of Nova Scotia. This is what happens when your court system isn't clogged up with frivolous lawsuits and Guantanamo detainees.

•The talented QB who's unjustly hated because of the snobby team he plays for is likely to be under center this weekend, despite his head injuries. Roethlisberger or Clausen?

•Abe Pollin, the longest tenured owner in the NBA, died yesterday at 85. The Wizards honored his memory with a 1-point win over a 4-9 team.

•Despite a win, Liverpool don't make the Champions League round of 16. This was news to me, as I was under the impression that the soccer season finished Sunday night in Seattle.

•The official douchebag bar of the Upper East Side (Mad River, for those in the know) apparently doubles as a Wisconsin Badger bar, and they could face charges for selling a Wisconsin beer that's not licensed to be sold out of state. Also not licensed to be in NYC: college football.

•••••

Your regular hosts will be with you shortly. Don't forget to starve yourself today.

This series will run on MONDAYS this year. Again, consult the initial post if you'd like to help us out with this.

ONE:

The following isn't your typical FAILgate story. It doesn't involve cops, fights, trips to the drunk tank, or wang exposure to the innocent (at least that we were aware of). It's a story about a man and his hair-color-matching vest.

It was February 2006, about a dozen friends and I had descended upon the parking lots of Lambeau Field for a truly epic sporting event. Our beloved Wisconsin Badger hockey team was taking on the Ohio State Buckeyes in the first ever hockey game at Lambeau. We knew that a certain level of intoxication must be achieved to watch outdoor hockey in Green Bay that time of year, so we arrived early for the afternoon puck-drop.

The tailgating scene was fantastic, and we quickly made friends with the other reasonably sized groups of Badger fans nearby. And then an hour or two into it, we saw him. He was wandering around our area, completely shit-canned, and he was dressed in layers, topped off by a vest that remarkably was the exact same color as his hair. At the time, that aspect for some reason was hysterical to most of us. Thinking he was with one of the other groups, we asked around only to discover nobody really knew who he was. Could it be? Had destiny placed him in our midst?

Not caring enough to know his actual name, he immediately adopted the nickname Vest (did I mention his vest was the same color as his hair?). And Vest meant fucking business as he decided to impress us with his beer slamming abilities. We formed a circle around Vest, started a slow clap, and began to chant…

"Vest!...Vest!...Vest!..."

He ripped through that first PBR and triumphantly hurled the can one aisle over into a group of unsuspecting tailgaters, much to our delight. We suspect Vest might not have been drinking the entire can, as it doesn't seem there's any way one could throw an empty beer can that far. But I also didn't think a person could so perfectly match a vest to the color of his own hair.

Thinking he had done the job, Vest attempted to exit the circle. But we wanted more. The circle tightened as others gathered in, and someone tossed him another beer.

"Vest!...Vest!...Vest!..."

A group of probably 30 of us at this point were cheering on Vest as he continued to pound and hurl his somewhat empty beer cans with everything he had, miraculously not drawing the attention of cops who were patrolling the lot. This scene repeated itself for probably 5 total beers until Vest, clearly overcome by the enormity of his accomplishment, yacked all over the ground and himself.

Presumably using the motto "to be the best, you gotta beat the best," a friend of ours challenged Vest to a series of Franzia-bongs. Because if you're going to consume Franzia, it had better at least be through a beer bong. The challenge was also issued through a sumo pose of sorts…..I remember it making perfect sense at the time.

After the two successfully completed a few Franzia-bongs, Vest was gone just like that. Off to where, who knew? Well, we didn't know at the time, but now have an idea. After the weekend when I uploaded my pictures, I noticed something about Vest that a lot of us somehow had missed while we were in his presence; Vest was wearing a press pass, as you can see in the previous picture. Had we been blinded by the vest? Possibly. Either way, this leads one to believe that Vest had left our tailgate to head into the stadium with soaked clothes while reeking of PBR, Doritos, and stomach acid, and drunk off his ass to perform a job, one which he possibly had to interact with other people. Vest was clearly not about to let a job get in the way of a good tailgate, and for that he deserves the utmost respect.

The legend of Vest has lived on amongst our group of friends, as we frequently reminisce that glorious day. Roughly a year later, we heard a story about a writer for a Badger sports website who showed up at a Badger road football game to cover the game and ended up getting kicked out of the press box because he was wasted, argumentative with other reporters, and passed out during the 2nd quarter. Could this have been Vest? Who knows...maybe that's just how he rolls? Frankly I'm not sure I even want to know. I'm perfectly content remembering him as the mystery man who inspired dozens that frigid afternoon with his grit, his determination, and his exuberance. And also his vest.

TWO:

USC doesn't typically start games at seven fifteen (7:15) Pacific time. It's just disrespectful. We don't go later than five p.m. EVER. Today was an exception, so when the tailgate occurred (which typically starts at one (double parentheses 1) or two (double parentheses again, 2) and went until kickoff, I felt like the end of the first quarter was halftime. This guy, however, felt like he got hit by a Taylor Mays full of vodka. Take a gander:

There's even a finger pointing at his epic failgateness. There's a puddle of drool/alcohol spilling from his body. But this only culminated his day of alcohol consumption:

Mr. Blackout not only spent his morning/afternoon pounding hard A, but found a cozy spot next to Tommy Trojan to nap the game away. What occured right before the passout was the epic part of this tory. Fulfilling his role as THE incoherent drunk, yet entertaining, fellow, we decided to bribe him 50 bucks to go and seduce the best milf next our spot. He obliged with out hesitation and found this disgusting cougar from washington. But instead of using his mouth to spit game or lick her, as promised, he used her as a kickstand for three seconds before vomiting right down her top.

As she sprinted down Trousdale to the nearest bathroom, he was showered with chants of "PUSSY," (why this has to do with vomiting on a chick's cleavage, I have no idea) followed by his stumbling onto the nearest steps across from Tommy Trojan, falling into a drunken slumber and subsequent drooling.

Nobody ponied up the Grant bill, and the USC Department of Public Safety escorted him to his residence on frat row. He's now a legend, just like Matt Barkley but with a slightly less positive connotation.

THREE:

In October 2001, I was leaving Foxboro Stadium after a New England Patriots game had ended, and thousands of fans were pouring out of the stadium and onto the street. For those of you on the interwebs not familiar with the Foxboro, Massachusetts area, after games local police rope off the sidewalks and force people to cross the street at certain spots. At least they did at the time. Now that it is Gillette Stadium/Patriot Place they may have ramps constructed over the road...

But one particularly drunk fan was determined to meander where he felt like it – ropes be damned. Approximately 35-years-old, he was clearly stumbling with his shirt completely unbuttoned to offer a better view of his happy trail-covered beer gut. My memory may be wrong on this, but in my head he will forever look like Zack Galifianakis from "The Hangover".

Without any friends to help him (my guess is they abandoned him) a horse–mounted police officer approached the man and asked him to go back under the rope and onto the sidewalk. The man refused, of course, and kept walking in the street. The officer followed him and once again ordered him to get back behind the ropes.

At this point, the man turned around and had a very natural reaction any well-balanced, sober person would have: he reeled back and cowboy punched the horse in the face. Punched. A horse. In the face.

The horse, to put it mildly, freaked the fuck out. The cop half fell off, half jumped off the horse while trying to grab the drunk at the same time. He managed to tear the man's shirt off as he fell, and the horse-puncher wiggled free and bolted down the street. But he didn't make it far.

Maybe it was the post-9/11 feelings about police. Maybe everybody assumed this guy was not a Pats fan. Or maybe people just seem to freaking love horses (see: Barbaro). But the fans definitely stepped up in a true act of…Patriotism? Heroism? Hilariousism? First, an older, bearded gentleman (think Gorton's Fisherman) ducked the ropes and basically dove in front of the man to trip him. As the man went flying to the ground, three or four equally drunk men tackled him. While the cop and a couple of bystanders wrangled the horse and calmed it down, these men held the now shirtless man down with a knee to the back and repeatedly bashed/smooshed his face and chest into the pavement. Not hard enough to kill him, just enough to say "hey guy, what in the sweet Jesus god is wrong with you that you would punch a horse."

The cop finally came over and arrested him, and the other fans, some would argue heroes, disappeared back to the crowd. My only hope is that the guy was charged with assaulting a police officer.

FOUR:

I was completing my final semester of college at Western Illinois in the fall of 2006, a school that has a good party rep. I was working on a live remote for the campus radio station during a tailgate before a Leatherneck game one fall morning, which consisted of handing out cups and other station swag to buzzed/drunk college kids. A truck had pulled up next to our spot and the guys and gals were having a merry ol' time with alcohol and our swag.

Also occurring on this day, the local Boy Scout troop was walking around the tailgate to promote fire safety or something like that. After a couple hours into the tailgate, one of the youngsters walked by our area, and one of the guys in the truck thrust a can of beer in front of the Boy Scout, urging him to chug it.

The Boy Scout (assuming that he was around 12 years old) proudly took the can and started chugging it. Unfortunately, he was chugging it right in front of a cop. The Boy Scout was dragged away, the tailgaters in the truck were subdued, and had to leave the party.

It was one of the funniest moments I had tailgating that year.

Attention tailgaters. It's a long season so please help us with this project and send along any and all shady stories, ridiculous videos, and photos from your tailgating experiences from this season. Or last season. Or 1952. Just make it funny/sad/gross/shocking. Email to tips@deadspin.com. Subject: FAILgate

Actually, there's a simpler explanation:

"One of my colleagues works at the U.S. Naval Academy and suggested we put together a trip to the Navy vs. Louisiana game last weekend. I believe there were about 30 or so who decided to go. As is the Wisconsin tradition, we also tailgated before, during and after the game. As is also UW tradition, I represented the Badgers by wearing a Badger hooded sweatshirt to the Navy game. Someone once said, no matter where you go, you'll find a fellow Badger. Sure enough, no less than a dozen Wisconsin alums stopped by our tailgate.

"As we entered the game and took our seats, I noticed the Midshipmen directly across from our seats. Then it dawned on me... I would stand out in that crowd. I told my friend to watch gate seven directly behind the Midshipmen. I went around the stadium and made my way down to the center of the Midshipmen seating section and wave to my partners in crime across the stadium. Before you knew it, several pictures had been taken. I was then informed I needed to leave the Midshipmen seating section. However, Badger Spirit had already been captured."

Yes, Waldo is very proud.

Now That Badger Stands Out In A Crowd! [Wisconsin Alumni Association]

* * * * *

Which brings me to my next order of business. My next two Saturdays are going to be occupied by football road trips. I'll be heading to the Michigan State-Michigan game on October 3, but first it's off to Madison for Michigan State at Wisconsin. I've been informed by anonymous sources that tailgating is not the hallowed UW tradition that some would lead you to believe (something about backbreaking winter weather?), but I'm more than willing to be proven wrong. Suggestions, tips and points of interest for Madison-area pregaming are welcome. Or just invite me to your FAILgate. I'll bring the video camera, you supply the horrific incidents of pain and degradation. It's win-win. (P.S. Please supply cheese curds and red ales and lagers.)

That goes for East Lansing, too. It's been awhile since I've done that town up right. I hope Dooley's is still as rockin' as ever!

Thanks for your continued support of Deadspin's search for quality bratwurst. Barry Petchesky to be on later. As soon as Salisbury stops emailing.

Sure, a couple of 16 seeds threatened to upend the titanium-refined axiom of the tournament, which is No. 1 seeds never lose in the tournament. Morehead State had a good first half, and East Tennessee State had a swell first 35 minutes, then reality kicked in for those small schools.

Oklahoma State made what I guess one might call a buzzer-beater, beating Tennessee in the final few seconds. Then there were exponentially impressive upsets, courtesy of Dayton and Arizona. Then once the clock struck 9:30, it became insane.

MICHIGAN STATE BEAT ROBERT MOR... wait.

Cleveland State absolutely de-pantsed Wake Forest, and life was fun. But then the Big Ten, tired of me filling out bingo cards that the announcers were going to slam the Garrison Keillor-caliber boredom that permeated their conference play, decided to have two teams play in wacky overtime games. Siena took two overtimes for Ronald Moore's 3-point shot to crack the Ohio State Nuts. Then 12-seeded Wisconsin —- whom CBS cut away from AS THE FINAL SHOT IN REGULATION WAS IN MID-AIR (no doubt you'll hear more about that tomorrow) — threw some sanctions of their own on Florida State, vanquishing them in OT.

While we catch our breath, crumple up our brackets, and put down the smoking pistol, it's now time to sincerely thank every one of the 32 humanoids that braved the notorious Gawker publishing system and typed away in a most marvelous fashion. It was a privilege to be a part of the project. There will be no live blogs until the Final Four, which should give me enough time to stop having nightmares that blue-haired ladies playing bingo rip my pants off and do ungodly things to my special purpose.

You ought to be in gentle hands with Pete and Spud this weekend. They both have excellent moisturizer.

Pre-game: This is the last of the always exciting 5 vs. 12 seed games which have become the perennial upset game. The 5 seeds are 1-2 so far, so another upset is possible. The stat is that at least one 12 seed has one in 9 straight years.

Florida St. went into the ACC Tournament seeded 4th and pulled off an upset of top seeded North Carolina to advance to the finals, where Duke topped them by 10. Senior guard Toney Douglas was named to the all tourney 1st team and freshman center Solomon Alabi was named to the 2nd team. Florida St. finished 4th in the ACC (25-9, 10-6).

Wisconsin also go the 4th seed in their conference tournament but were beaten in their first game by 5th seeded Ohio St. They are coached by Bo Ryan, who is in his 8th year as head coach in Madison. Ryan has been to the tournament every year at Wisconsin, winning at least one game in all but one of those trips.

Ryan may be the difference in this one. These teams are separated by 30 spots in ESPN's RPI so the 5 and 12 seeds don't seem that far fetched. But Ryan is a good coach and will have his guys prepared to play.

More Pregame: So I don't yet know if we are rolling with Comcast or CBSSports.com for this game. Not sure what they are going to show in Chicago. Looks like we will get the Badgers.

Winner plays Xavier on Sunday. The requisite 3 white guys for Wisconsin in the starting lineup. I have been informed that no #12 won in 2007. Not sure if that is true.

Craig Bolderjack and Wenzel are doing this game. Yea I have no fucking idea either.

Final - 61-59 is the final. Madison is going to be rocking tonight. Fish Bowls at Wando's!!!! Great 2nd half by the Badgers. Good coaching gets you far, almost remember that when filling out your bracket. See you all in the next round.

0:00 - Baseball pass not completed! Badgers win! Wow! Ended with being an exciting game. And the Big 10 win again. Thanks for joining us!

0:02 - BTW, we all know Douglas is taking the last shot, right?

0:02 - Trevon Hughes gets the call. Drives the lane and makes a sweet shot after a spin move AND ONE!!!!! Badgers get the free throw, up 61-59. Timeout Noles!!

0:07 - Douglas bricks a dagger 3. Badgers get the rebound and break the other way, Bohannon jacks up a 3 but Bo called a timeout. The shot went in too!!! Ouch. Badgers are down one with the ball. I like their chances. It could go to anyone on this play.

0:47 - Great back door pass and a quick layup. That was a set play out of the timeout. FSU will run it down.

1:02 - FSU finally wises up and gives the ball to Douglas. He buries the 3. He has a game high 26. Badgers take a timeout. It will be interesting to see what the do here. They aren't a go to the hoop kind of team so I expect them to go for a three.

1:20 - FSU travels. The Badgers slow it down. Miss the shot as shot clock winds down. Still tied.

2:30 - Another FSU foul. Some awful free throw shooting by Wisconsin. One trickles in. Tied again.

2:53 - FSU gets down in the low block and scores to take the lead by 1.

3:29 - Siena and tOSU just went to OT #2. The Big Ten is going crazy!!!! Is anyone still awake for these games? FSU gets the basket to cut it to one. Badgers airball a jumper. 44-54 Badgers.

4:19 - Bohannon with a quick 3 to start OT. FSU is still going with three guards and Wenzel let's us know for the 100th time tonight. FSU foul. Badgers up 2 and shooting free throws.

End of Regulation

0:00 - Jordan Taylor misses the jumper with 2 to go and we head to OT!!!!! I don't know if that's a good thing or not.

0:17 - Douglas made both free throws. Tied at 52!!!!!!!! Badgers take a time out and will hold for the last shot.

0:36 -Badgers are 7 of 13 in the 2nd half from downtown. That is how you do it I guess. Douglas gets fouled going to the hoop. Free throw time.

0:45 - Bohannon for 3 with 1 on the shot clock!!! He was way outside, I don't know how he go that off. Badgers 52, Noles 50. TO for the Noles. The white guys have come to play!

1:29 - Kitchen left his feet and tried to call a timeout as he was going out of bounds. They call him for traveling. Wenzel says this was the right call by "new" rules. Whatver. Nonsense. Badger ball, down 1.

1:54 - The Badgers hit another 3, their 7th of the night. Noles answer with a bucket. 50-49 FSU.

2:51 - Douglas draws the foul and hits two free throws. Wisconsin subs white guy for white guy.

3:12 -Wenzel just said "if you like defense, you will like this game." Apparently he equates crappy shooting with good defense. Hughes responds with a trey. Tied at 46. We got ourselves a game.

3:48 - MMOD is getting crappy. So much buffering. WTF? How many people could be watching this shitty game right now. I just lowered the quality. Let's see if it helps. Hughes finally hits a free throw. Two actually. 46-43 'Noles.

3:49 - Under 4 timeout. FSU is up 46-41. 100 is no longer looking like a lock. Sienna is at the line for the go ahead with 8 seconds left.

4:38 - Chris Singleton just hit a jumper for FSU. First points by anyone since 8:28!! 4 minutes!!! What a crapfest.

5:00 - There is a guy on FSU named Uche Echefu. It's like I just banged on random keys but that is actually his name. Trevon Hughes misses two free throw. Still 44-39.

5:43 - Timeout FSU. Badgers look tired. Douglas could take this game over and put it away if he wants. The commercials on MMOD are even worse than TV. In the meantime, read this to get a feeling for Big Ten Country (NSFW) http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2009/0318091dog1.html

6:07 - In case you were wondering, Michigan St. and Cleveland St. are both in control. Biggest upset of the first round comes on one of the last games. tOSU up 4 with under 2 minutes left. Meanwhile, our game has screeched to a crawl. Still 44-39 'Noles.

Commercial - I just saw that Nike Illinois ad for at least the 19th time during this game. Even I am sick of it. By the way, we have moved over to MMOD.

7:34 - Under 8 timeout. Same score. This game is pretty close. We should break 100 too. Neither team really deserves to win. I am so spoiled since I usually watch sports on a 20 minute or so delay I usually don't see commercials. I can't believe how many just repeat over and over. Miller Lite and Resident Evil 5 for like the 10th time each.

8:14 - I am anticipating them cutting over to Ohio St./Siena shortly, so we will have to move to MMOD. Badgers get first basket in a while. 44-39 'Noles. Marcus Landy's goggles do nothing!

9:18 - Toney Douglas has put the 'Nole up by 7. He is taking over this game. He has 19. The power of a star in this tournament should not be overlooked.

11:14 - There are a lot of empty seats. I mean It's only 8:30 or 9:30 there. How many other things could there be to do in Boise right now? FSU makes free throws. They lead 39-37. Mich St. is rolling. Paulas must be having a blast live blogging that.

Commercial - I have to admit, I do like the Nike commercial with the cop in Illinois giving the car a ticket for 1 MPH over because they have a Tarheels sticker. Then the flashback of UNC beating Illinois in 2005, which was by the way, my best sports year ever.

Cleveland St. - Is still up 9! I guess we knew that we needed a 13 seed to pull an upset. Wake Forest seemed like a trendy pick though.

11:47 - Badgers got blocked twice on same possession and still scored. Tenacious white guys! 37-35 Badgers, under 12 timeout.

12:36 - Both teams are playing a bit out of control. FSU freshman Luke Loucks is down with an injury. His left arm. Turnovers and offensive fouls the last couple trips. Loucks is in a lot of pain.

13:01 - In case you aren't watching, this crowd is pretty mediocre. It has to be a bitch to get to Boise from anywhere. It seems like a pro-Wisconsin crowd. You would think after an 11 year drought that FSU would travel better. Although maybe they just assume they will forfeit the wins in 5 years anyway. 35 all after a Badger 3.

13:51 - The 'Noles get their first basket of the half to retake the lead after 13 straight points to start the game for the Badgers.

14:45 - 11-0 run for Badgers in the 2nd half. 31-30 'Noles. It's getting tight. Another FSU turnover.

15:56 - Under 16 timeout. All of the sudden it's a new game. Halftime turnarounds are usually the responsibility of the coach. And as I said before, Bo Ryan is a good coach. He must have passed on the cigs at halftime.

16:37 - I just found out that Toney Douglas is the brother of former Louisville and current Atlanta Falcon WR Harry Douglas. The Badgers are making a run after some sloppy FSU play. Just buried a 3 to make it 31-26 'Noles.

17:55 - FSU is giving new meaning to sloppy seconds. Douglas with the charge. Throwing up bricks. Badgers turn if right back over. This is how the first half started. Timeout.

18:54 - Xavier has to be sitting at home loving this game. I doubt they seem concerned about either team at this point. Krabbenhoft hits a 3!! The Badgers are alive.

20:00 - About ready for the 2nd half. The John Deere commercial seems like focused advertising. That's some nice work. A couple of FSU's cheerleaders looked over 30. WTF is that? Were is Jenn Sterger when you need her.

Halftime - The Badgers shot an atrocious 1 of 10 from three point land. Marcus Landry is their leading scorer with 6. No one has more than 2 boards. They are also shooting 26% from the field. FSU is shooting 50% from the field and 3 of 6 from outside. Douglas has 10 points. Kitchen has 6 boards. Michigan St. only has 9 less points than these two teams combined in the first half. Your nonathletic Badger stat of the half, 0 blocks to FSU's 3.

All joking aside, FSU has this game in control. Wisconsin will have to get hot from outside to have a chance. It's unlikely they will continue to shoot as bad as they are so the game isn't OVER. But as I said before, when you are a Big Ten team and can't hit a jumper, you are in trouble.

0:00 - Toney Douglas took a knee to the thigh. He sat out the last 30 seconds. Wisconsin needs to pull a Tonya Harding ASAP. 31-19 'Noles at halftime. Stats coming your way...

0:36 - Cleveland St. is up 9 at the half against Wake. Ohio St. is up 5 on Siena at the half. And we are stuck with this crapfest?

1:33 - Wisconsin is really not playing bad, they just can't make shots. That is what happens when you are a Big 10 team. You live and die by the jumper. FSU is up 29-19 and really extending this lead before halftime.

2:33 - Another timeout. This is the under 4 TV TO. Bo Ryan is going to go for a whole pack of cigs at halftime. I think Toney Clemons said before the game that he was glad this game was in Idaho, because the only way he would sleep with a Wisconsin female is if she was wearing a potato sack over her head. *whew* finally got that Idaho joke in....and it sucked

3:02 - Timeout. FSU is getting hot. Singleton hit a 3. 'Noles lead 26-19. Tomahawk chop going on.

3:23 - FSU has a guy with the last name Kitchen. That really isn't important. Both teams just exchanged baskets. 23-19 'Noles. We may break 100 yet!

4:56 - Wow, FSU player grabbed the defensive board, sprinted the other way past the entire Badger team, missed the layup and Xavier Gibson slammed it home. FSU is trying to get in a rhythm.

5:58 - This is FSU's first tourney appearance since 1998. Since then, they have had a Rhodes Scholar, the original MySpace Whore and Bobby Bowden's sons have run his good name into the ground. Oh yea, tied at 17.

7:06 - FSU has gone to a 3 guard lineup. They are just blowing by the white guys. I mean seriously, I am white. We are slow. The way to beat us to run by us. Although, against Wisconsin FSU could just hope that after a long winter of seeing Madison girl's post hibernation bodies that they might be distracted by the FSU cheerleaders. Under 8 TV timeout. Seminoles by 4. Badgers are 0 for 5 from downtown. If the Badgers aren't hitting threes the best they can hope for is a cheese curd eating contest.

7:24 - Man, if I see that stupid Domino's commercial with the CEO again I am gonna punch a hole in my TV where his face is. The Badgers grabbed a loose ball and called a timeout.

7:30 - Bo Ryan stepped out for a cig and the Badgers are slipping. Douglas hits a 3 and FSU has the lead for the first time tonight?

9:00 - Douglas gets his first FG on the best FSU possession of the night. 12-11 Badgers.

9:45 - Alabi looks good. He is a redshirt freshman and is leading FSU with 6. That guy could be a beast in the ACC next year.

10:30 - Toney Douglas is out of the game right now. Guess that is what happens when you average 20+ and only have 1 so far.

11:26 - TV Timeout. 10-5 Badgers. Seriously? 15 points in 8+ minutes? Ladies and Gentleman, Big Ten Basketball!

Does anyone think Bo Ryan looks like he smokes 10 packs a day? He also looks like the dad of some hot girl who you date and when you finally meet him he pulls you aside and says "Don't fuck my daughter. I have a shotgun and I know every cop in town."

12:01 - Clemons finally gets his first point. Nice Hoosiers reference in the comments. This game is definitely missing a drunk Dennis Hopper.

13:00 - Another FSU turnover. Sloppy. If this game is in Boise, why don't they play it on the Smurf turf?

13:35 - 8-4 Badgers. We have a barn burner going. Bohannon just picked up his 2nd foul. One player from each team with 2 fouls.

14:00 - Wisconsin is using the entire shot clock repeatedly. And FSU just got called for their 2nd OFFENSIVE foul.

15:00 - The announcers gave us Toney Douglas' point totals recently. He has been lighting it up. 10 points for both teams in 5 minutes so far.

Under 16 timeout: - As expected Wisconsin is really slowing it down. FSU probably has an advantage in a track meet.

16:00 - We are expecting our first Bobby Bowden reference anytime now.

17:00 - The Badgers have added a 4th white guy. It's like they want to be a stereotype. And the lone African American Trevon Hughes scores.

18:00 - Four all. Both teams have scored all all their possessions.

19:00 - Monster dunk by Alabi to start the game. Wisconsin answers. No much defense so far. Announcers seem surprised.

2) Solomon Alabi, From Nigeria to New York via destiny? After not playing much last season, Florida State center Solomon Alabi has quickly become one of the more dominating big men in the ACC. Considered the 24th best player in the nation when he came out of high school, Alabi didn't start playing organized hoops until leaving his home country of Nigeria as a teenager. So no, he has absolutely nothing in common with Saleh from the 1994 Kevin Bacon classic, "The Air Up There." As a matter of fact, Alabi might want to do whatever it takes to distance himself from the movie as Bacon's character was named "Jimmy Dolan", a name way too close to New York Knicks craptastic CEO James Dolan. To add insult to frequent injury, according to the official Florida State athletic site, Alabi is being compared to Knicks bust Antonio McDyess.

3) Many, many, moons ago in 1998 The Noles have not made an NCAA Tournament in over 10 years. Not since 1998. Yet even their dance in the Year of McGwire and Slammin' Sammy is ripe with coincidences. Way back in the ancient days of yester-century, the Noles engaged in battle with the mighty Crusaders from Valparaiso. Led by Bryce Drew, what they had there was a Crusader victory. But all was not lost for the team from Tallahassee. Even in defeat, they could find solace. After winning, Bryce Drew married Tara Thibedeaux, daughter of Keith Thibodeaux, better known as "Little Ricky" on the show "I Love Lucy." Also making an appearance on "I Love Lucy", albeit for one show, was actress Joan Crawford. In her epic disaster of a bio pic, "Mommie Dearest", Crawford was played by Hollywood starlet Faye Dunaway, who went to, among other colleges, Florida State.

Bonus plea to the Seminole gods: Back in 2000-2001, current FSU coach Leonard Hamilton presided over a disastrous Washington Wizards team that went 19-63. According to Basketball-Reference.com, however, the Wizards were supposed to have won 23. Those four wins destiny owes Leonard Hamilton could get the Noles to the Final Four. — Jordi Scrubbings (The Serious Tip/ScalpEm/Thunder Matt's Saloon)

WISCONSIN BADGERS

1) Livin' on the Edge The 12th-seeded Wisconsin Badgers have been up-and-down this year, to put it mildly—in conference, they had winning streaks of three and five games apiece, and a losing streak between the two that reached six—but thanks to a surprisingly strong not-completely-horrible better-than-the-SEC Big Ten, head coach Bo Ryan managed to smuggle the Badgers into the dance for the 11th straight season. Only Arizona, Kansas, Duke, and Michigan State have longer active streaks—pretty heady territory for the Badgers, considering they earned bids only twice between 1947 and 1997.

2) Defensive Struggles It may come as a surprise to anyone familiar with Ryan's coaching style, but statistically, the Badgers have struggled more on defense than offense this season. According to Ken Pomeroy's rankings, Wisconsin is the 24th best team in the country (and best in the Big Ten) in terms of offensive efficiency (points scored per 100 possessions), yet only ranks 60th in defensive efficiency. Neither of these stats is especially notable (especially for a team that went only 18-12 in the regular season), but they are interesting when compared with Coach Ryan's last few squads. Since 2004, only the 2006 team failed to finish in the top 10 in defensive efficiency, and none finished better than 26th on the offensive end. Combined with the Badgers' top 20 strength-of-schedule and mediocre record, the efficiency stats create an interesting situation in which the Badgers are actually ranked higher in Pomeroy's rankings than their first round opponent, fifth-seeded Florida State.

3) A Glimpse Into the Future The starter with the most potential on this year's squad, and probable frontcourt anchor in '10, is sophomore center/guard Jon Leuer. Center/guard might not be a real position, but if anybody plays there, it's Leuer. A guard his first two years in high school, Leuer grew 9 inches by the time he graduated. The result is a 6-10 power forward with perimeter skills (last year, in his first Big Ten game, he was 5 of 5 from distance) who can also put the ball on the floor and finish around the rim. Leuer started the year coming off the bench in support of fellow sophomore Keaton Nankivil, but his first start came against Illinois, and the Badgers subsequently went on a five-game tear that put them above .500 in conference play for good. He needs to bulk up and improve his defensive skills, but there's a good chance he will end up better than Brian Butch when all is said and done. — Sam Gardner

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Taylor played for Alvarez from 1995 to 1998, and in one of life's cruel ironies, also played briefly for the Madison Mad Dogs, a professional indoor football team. Speaking of crazy, remember two of the league's other gloriously-named franchises, the Steel Valley Smash and Utah Catzz? But I digress.

Taylor, 32, left dozens of voicemail messages with the Wisconsin athletic department within the last week. Those messages included a call on Nov. 24 during which he said he would come to Madison to kill Alvarez and his family.

"I'll kill you first, mother (expletive)," Taylor said. "I've got 24 (expletive) hours, mother (expletive). I'm coming for your (expletive) ass. You might have a (expletive) war."

The profanity-laced messages accused Sharapova of committing various injustices against him. He said he wanted to marry her and kill her and her family.

"Barry, you heard that (expletive) message, (expletive) it. I hate that (expletive) Maria Sharapova ... I just want to look at you one (expletive) last time before I pull the (expletive) trigger, Barry," one message said.

Taylor was arrested on Friday in Indianapolis, where he lives. And so I'm left wondering, how did he get all of those phone numbers? Once he's better, this man has a future in sales.

Former Wisc. Player Accused Of Threatening Alvarez [Chicago Tribune]
Ex-Player Charged With Threats To Alvarez [Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel]

WISCONSIN BADGERS

1. Bo Ryan has written the book on the Swing Offense. Long before he was roaming the sidelines in as a head coach in Madison, Coach Ryan was perfecting his Swing Offense at D-III UW-Platteville, where he won four national titles and had two undefeated seasons. As a matter of fact, Ryan wrote the book on the Swing Offense. There is a video as well. Description for the video is as follows: NCAA Division III National Champion Bo Ryan shares the offense that has made him successful.The Swing is an offense designed to get the ball into high percentage scoring areas, get your team good shots, and to the free throw line. The constant cutting-on the weak side as well as the ball side-makes the defense work on every possession. Coach Ryan covers the basic continuity of the offense and goes over all the options available. 1996, 38 Minutes. Yes, you too can learn the Swing Offense in 38 minutes. That must be one intense video. I plan on showing it to my first-born son every night. Bo Ryan also has instructional videos on how to do the Soulja Boy dance and the Hambone. A man of many talents indeed!

2. 30 wins? No Problem. Only three times in Big Ten history have teams had back-to-back 30 win seasons. The 1974-75 Indiana team went 31-1, losing in the regional finals. They followed that up with the last undefeated season in D-I and won the national title, going 32-0 in 1976. In 1998-99, Michigan State went 33-5 and lost in the Final Four. The next season they went 32-7 and won the national title. During the 2006-076 season, the Wisconsin Badgers posted the first 30-win season in school history, going 30-6, but losing in the second round of the NCAA tournament. This year's Badgers are 31-4, and counting, and hope to follow the success of the previous back to back 30-win Big Ten teams by winning a national title in the second season. Also, the Badgers are one of just five teams in the country that have won at least 30 games in each of the last two seasons. Joining the Badgers are North Carolina, UCLA, Memphis and Kansas.

3. More fun player facts. In our pre-tournament preview, we told you how leading scorer Brian Butch is not an actual polar bear, Joe Krabbenhoft has had over 35 separate "stitch events" to his face over the years, and Trevon Hughes took a cue from the Cobra Kai's Halloween costume and dressed up as a skeleton. Here are a couple more tidbits. Reserve center Greg Stiemsma has developed a nice reputation as the team's barber. Greg also spent time prior to the second round game hitting up Outdoor World in Omaha to purchase a new fishing rod for an upcoming fishing trip. Something tells me he did not run in to Michael Beasley there. One final Stiemsma note: He lists the worst job he ever had as "hoeing weeds." OK. Michael Flowers, the heart and soul of this team, lists "Welcome to the Jungle" as his cell phone ring. I can support that, but I think Mike was about two years old when that song came out. Also, defense runs in the Flowers family. While Michael was robbed of the Big Ten Defensive Player of the Year Award this year, his brother, Jonte, won his fourth straight Northern Sun Conference Defensive Player of the Year award for D-II Winona State. Also: Erin > Doris: This season, the Badgers are 5-0 when Erin Andrews is the sideline reporter for the game while they are only 1-2 when Doris Burke is involved in some capacity. This calls for a little more Erin and a little less Doris, something I think we all can agree on. — Ben Goldsworthy

DAVIDSON WILDCATS

1. We're really a bunch of dorks. Before last weekend, if you'd heard of Davidson, it almost certainly was because of academics, not athletics. But after two upset wins, don't start thinking this is some secret sports juggernaut. That should be readily evident when you hear the team has adopted Sweet Caroline as a sort-of theme song. And that point guard Jason Richards and Stephen Curry do this weird handshake about a hand fitting into a glove. (I always forget who is which.) And, yes, at one point, we (I still use 'we;' sue me) had an all-white lineup on the floor against Georgetown. These are mostly smart guys who managed to be good at sports too.

2. And Curry is this good. He is grabbing highlights and headlines with 40 and 30 points in the two NCAA tournament games, but the people going ga-ga over him are the ones who haven't paid that much attention. Thanks to DirecTV, I now receive every sports channel ever created, and that means I was able to watch 10 or so Davidson games from a distance this season — which is, by far, the most games we've ever had televised. And Curry has played like this all season. So forgive me if I'm not bowing down to his greatness right now. I did that about three months ago.

3. How about that coach? As happy as I am about these wins and as proud of an alum as I am, I am especially happy for Bob McKillop, who finally got his signature wins after 19 mostly good seasons at Davidson. About 10 years ago when I was in school and covering the team, I used to be around McKillop on a fairly regular basis. I would not say that I got to know him, but I became a little familiar with his type of personality. So when I heard that he said, "I'm numb right now," I was happy for him. He is not somebody I ever would imagine genuinely feels numb. But that he thinks he feels numb must be an incredible feeling for him.

And I have to admit that I had a fleeting thought that these signature wins would be the publicity that McKillop needs to get a job at a more well-funded program. There have been rumors about him being up for such a higher-profile job over the years and, at one point, he might have made that jump. Several years back, though, he crossed over into legendary status. Yeah, he could go somewhere else for a few years, but he would always be our coach. I have a hunch that this time around, he would be the one telling the bigger dogs to take a hike. That, however, is something to worry about after Wisconsin.

So, from the Piedmont, to the Triad, to the hills of Carolina, it is a great week to be a Wildcat. — Matt Pitzer

Davidson vs. Wisconsin, 7:10 pm Friday

#10 Davidson Wildcats

Last Weekend: Defeated #7 Gonzaga 82-76, defeated #2 Georgetown 74-70

How Davidson Got Here: Superior guard play. Stephen Curry and Jason Richards are the backbone of this Wildcats team.. Curry had 40 points against the Zags and 30 points against the Hoyas. Fifty-five of his seventy points have come in the second half. Richards, the NCAA leader in assists, did not disappoint either, with 35 points and 14 assists playing all but four minutes of the first two games. In the Georgetown game, Curry and Richards, by virtue of either points scored or assists tallied, accounted for 70 of the Cats' 74 points, including a hand in every field goal made. That is impressive.

What the Sweet 16 Means for Davidson: The difficult non-conference schedule paid off. They were not fazed by the big stage. While any Davidson fan, player and coach must be absolutely thrilled by what has happened so far, the Wildcats have to believe that they are the next George Mason. They have to believe, in their heart of hearts, that they can make the Final Four given the right opportunity.

Chances to Reach San Antonio: Perhaps the third slimmest chance of anyone left in this tournament (the first and second being Western Kentucky and Villanova). But they have to feel good about their chances to make the Elite 8. Wisconsin's style means the pace will be slow, allowing starters to play close to 40 minutes and the Wildcats to keep it close regardless of the outcome. In Kansas, they may have to face the most talented team of the tournament. Then again, that's what they said about UConn in 2006.

#3 Wisconsin Badgers

Last Weekend: Defeated #14 CS Fullerton 71-56, defeated #11 Kansas State 72-55.

How Wisconsin Got Here: Insanely good defense. The Badgers have played hard-nosed defense all season long, and last weekend was a powerful showcase of just that. Sure, the Badgers allowed Michael Beasley to drop 17 on them in the first half. But in the second half, they surrendered just six points from the best college player in the land. Bo Ryan's squad has the liberty of avoiding Georgetown, however now they're stuck with the possible Cinderella story of this year's tournament, Davidson.

What the Sweet 16 Means for the Badgers: A Sweet 16 appearance for this year's Badgers should come as no surprise. They've found incredible leadership from Michael Flowers, one of the best hustle players in the country in Joe Krabbenhoft and a slew of other players that simply know their roles (i.e. Marcus Landry, Trevon Hughes). Wisconsin is in a very favorable position now to make a strong run at a Final Four, with its upcoming game against Davidson and a potential showdown with Kansas.

Chances to Reach San Antonio: Good, but not likely. The Badgers can and should defeat Davidson, but a potential Elite Eight game against Kansas would be too much for them. The Jayhawks are better, faster and stronger (and harder?) than Wisconsin and would prevent them from making a Final Four run.

Villanova vs. Kansas, 9:40 pm Friday

#12 Villanova Wildcats

Last Weekend: Defeated #7 Clemson 75-69, defeated #13 Siena 84-72

How Villanova Got Here: Scottie Reynolds and a favorable draw. Reynolds has had an up and down 2008 season while transitioning to becoming "the man" at Nova, but he caught fire following a 22-point performance against Syracuse in the first round of the Big East tournament. He's continued to lead Nova in scoring each game since, including his huge second half against Clemson and 25-point performance against Siena. The Wildcats also caught a break by playing a choketastic Clemson team and a Siena squad whose season was complete with a win over Vandy.

What the Sweet 16 Means to the Wildcats: If you told any Villanova fan on January 23, right after the Cats were just routed by Rutgers, that this team was going to the Sweet 16, they would have assumed you were on meth. This Sweet 16 run is a total surprise for Villanova, so the Cats are basically playing with house money from here out. All this can do it set up the Wildcats as a possible Top 10/Top 5 team to start next season.

Chances to Reach San Antonio: Not likely, but it's not like Villanova hasn't done this before in program history. Still, there are no more double-digits seeds for the Cats, as they now have to face the powerful Kansas Jayhawks. While the multi-talented 'Hawks probably have too much size, depth and firepower for the Wildcats, they are still coached by Bill Self, and the three-pointer is the great equalizer in the college hoops.

#1 Kansas Jayhawks

Last Weekend: Defeated #16 Portland State 85-61, Defeated #8 UNLV 75-56.

How Kansas Got Here: The beatdown of Big Sky champs Portland State was routine, with future NBA draft picks drubbing guys who would be lucky to get a tryout for Slamball (it's back, you know!). UNLV provided a slightly tougher test, shutting down the perimeter in the first half until Kansas used superior quickness to penetrate the lane, score and open up the outside game. In all, it has been pretty easy so far.

What the Sweet 16 Means to Kansas: A sigh of relief to a team that still remembers the two-season "Killer Bs" debacle. However, anything short of a Final Four this season will leave Kansas fans exasperated, and add just a little more heat to Bill Self's kiester.

Chances of Reaching San Antonio: Inheriting the winner of a 12 vs. 13 matchup almost doesn't seem fair, but Jayhawk players and fans will take it. With respectable but limited teams like Wisconsin and Davidson lurking on the other side of the bracket, if Kansas doesn't make it to San Antonio this year, the program's reputation could take a near-fatal hit. Going through Detroit just like Danny's '88 squad did has the Lawrence faithful hoping for another Miracle.

There are considerable similarities to 2006 in the bracket too; Kansas is that similar kind of somewhat overrated "favorite" the way that Connecticut was that year. (Also, Bill Self, again, has never made the Final Four.) And even though we consider Wisconsin our sleeper, few would argue that they're this terrifying force in the Sweet 16. Davidson fans — and there are some, swear, more than you'd think — have been waiting for years to finally break through with that one tournament win. Now they're seeming like gluttons.

By the way, how awesome is it that Davidson was Larry Brown's first job ... until he changed his mind and left. So unlike him!

(Getty Images Photo)

1 Kansas vs. 16 Portland State (Omaha)
Kansas is one of the most experienced and well-rounded teams in this entire tournament, so it should the Jayhawks should be damn thankful that they landed perhaps the easiest regional of the No. 1 seeds. The Jayhawks should have absolutely no problem disposing of Portland State.
The Pick: Kansas

8 UNLV vs. 9 Kent State (Omaha)
This game right here is the ultimate 8-9 first round matchup. Why? Because it's nearly impossible to pick. UNLV is coming off a huge upset of BYU in its conference tournament, while Kent State picked up some big wins this season against George Mason and at St. Mary's. In the end, the coin toss went the Rebels' way.
The Pick: UNLV

5 Clemson vs. 12 Villanova (Tampa)
Anybody who witnessed Sunday's gem of a game between North Carolina and Clemson has got to agree - Clemson is for real. This is a team that has somehow, someway battled with North Carolina all season long and even defeated Duke in the ACC Tourney. Look for the Tigers to make a lot of noise in the early going of the tournament.
The Pick: Clemson

4 Vanderbilt vs. 13 Siena (Tampa)
Siena provides one of the lone, true upsets of this regional. They've got a win against Stanford under their belts this season and should take advantage of a Vanderbilt team that dropped three of its final five games of the season - including two to Arkansas (Hoosiers beware!).
The Pick: Siena

6 USC vs. 11 Kansas State (Omaha)
Ahh, yes - the battle of the two best freshmen in all of college basketball, O.J. Mayo and Michael Beas(t)ley. Put that aside for a moment though. The more interesting matchup may come between Mayo and K. State's Bill Walker, who are former high school teammates. In the end, Beasley will undoubtedly turn in yet another huge performance and lead his team to victory.
The Pick: Kansas State

3 Wisconsin vs. 14 CS Fullerton (Omaha)
Like Davidson, who I'll get to in a moment, momentum will be the ultimate key for the Badgers. Wisconsin played well during the Big Ten Tournament, despite a quasi-injury to Trevon Hughes who is still struggling to find his shot. As long as Brian Butch and Michael Flowers are playing well though - and Joe Krabbenhoft is up to his usual garbage-cleaning ways - the Badgers should advance to Round 2 without breaking a sweat.
The Pick: Wisconsin

7 Gonzaga vs. 10 Davidson (Raleigh)
Forget the Houston Rockets. Nobody cares about the NBA anyway, right? Well as everybody knows by now, the Wildcats have won 22 straight. Davidson played at UCLA, at Duke and at North Carolina early in the season, and lost all three...however, they lost by just six to Duke and just four to the Tar Heels. There's no question that Gonzaga is a formidable foe, but Davidson has all the momentum they need heading into this one.
The Pick: Davidson - the streak stays alive

2 Georgetown vs. 15 UMBC (Raleigh)
Everybody keeps talking about Roy Hibbert, the difference maker - and rightfully so. But Hoyas' guard Jessie Sapp - as well as the other G-Town guards - deserve some attention. Sapp and his backcourt mates will be the ultimate difference makers for the Hoyas in the tournament and could provide the extra push Georgetown needs to make a title run.
The Pick: Georgetown

Some Midwest Region Superlatives...
Dark Horse for Final Four: Clemson
Dark Horse for Sweet 16: Davidson
Best First Round Upset: Siena over Vanderbilt
Best Opening Round Game: Mayo-Beasley
Best Potential Game: Clemson-Villanova
Round of 32: Kansas over UNLV, Clemson over Siena, Wisconsin over Kansas State, Georgetown over Davidson
Sweet 16: Kansas over Clemson, Georgetown over Wisconsin
Elite Eight: Kansas over Georgetown
Regional Champ: Kansas

WISCONSIN BADGERS

1. Team of the 2000's? OK, that may be taking things a bit too far, but let's review what the basketball Badgers have accomplished since the year 2000. One Final Four, 2 Elite Eights, 3 Sweet Sixteens, 3 Big Ten Regular Season titles (2 outright) and two Big Ten Tournament titles. Although the casual fan might most easily identify with Indiana or Michigan State as traditional Big Ten powers, Indiana has not won an outright Big Ten regular season title since 1993 and Michigan State hasn't won one since 1999. The most amazing stat is Wisconsin has made the NCAA Tournament in 10 straight seasons. Coming in to this season, only five teams can top that streak: Arizona (23), Kansas (18), Kentucky (16), Duke (12), Michigan State (10). Not bad company. What is even more amazing is that prior to this run, Wisconsin only made the NCAA Tournament twice since their 1941 national championship; the 1994 Michael Finley-led team and the 1997 squad.

2. The Badgers' leaders. Leading scorer Brian Butch (whose elbow has not been grotesquely inverted yet this season), has two favorite TV shows: Ice Road Truckers and Deadliest Catch. Hopefully those trucks on Ice Road Truckers don't run over any polar bears. Butch also receives text messages from Erin Andrews after hitting game winning shots, so he has that going for him, which is nice. Butch is also the leading rebounder so we will give you a tidbit on second leading rebounder, Joe Krabbenhoft, who Seth Davis said he was going to name his dog after. Krabbenhoft, who played for a team called the Rough Riders in South Dakota in high school, has had more than 35 separate "stitch events" to his face over the years, according to his mom. This will serve him well if he ever tries out to be Mr. Met. Krabbenhoft is also the team's leader in assists, so we will move along to the No. 2 assist man, Trevon Hughes, a promising sophomore from Queens. Two things about Trevon stand out to me. The first is that his favorite Madison restaurant is Qdoba. Outstanding. You can't go wrong with Qdoba on State Street at 2:30 in the morning. Also, his favorite Halloween costume is a skeleton. I can only hope Trevon's friends also dressed up as skeletons and chased around someone dressed like Daniel LaRusso while yelling such lines as "Sweep the leg!" and "Get him a body bag Johnny, Yah!" while singing "You're the Best Around."

3. Bucky Badger, Available for your wedding. Mr. Buckingham U. Badger, Bucky to his close friends, has been patrolling the sidelines at University of Wisconsin sporting events since 1949. Bucky's name stems from a line in the school's fight song, "On, Wisconsin," where the football team is inspired to "buck right through that line." A live badger was first brought to a football game in 1940 but proved to be too rambunctious and hostile towards people, surprisingly, and was retired to a local zoo. Its offspring went on to star in the Badger, Badger, Badger video and recent Toyota ads. Bucky has become a fan favorite throughout the nation and in 2006 was inducted in to the Mascot Hall of Fame as a charter member of the College Division, along with Aubie from Auburn and YoUDee from Delaware. Along with attending various sporting events and campus activities, Bucky is available for a host of other events where Bucky, from personal experience, stands on his head, polkas, does the Worm, and mingles with the attractive ladies in attendance. No uglies for Bucky! — Ben Goldsworthy

CAL STATE FULLERTON TITANS

1. Remember the Titans. Thirty years ago the Titans advanced to the elite eight only to be bounced out of the 1978 field by the famed "triplets" of Arkansas (guards Sidney Moncrief , Marvin Delph and Ron Brewer) who were coached by Eddie Sutton (some 628 wins ago). Speaking of legends former CSF basketball star Greg Bunch was in attendance at the Big West conference finals to witness the Titans return to the Big Dance three decades after he lead them in their memorable debut.

2. Cut(ly) and Run. Senior forward Scott Cutley, who averages 14.8 points and 7.6 rebounds per game, was named Co-Big West Player of the Year. Cutley left Kent State after his sophomore season, and it must have seemed like forward thinking to his teammate, junior forward Marcus Crenshaw (8.9 ppg), who also left the Golden Flashes for Fullerton. The Titans starting backcourt of Josh Akognon (19.9 ppg) and Ray Reed (6.4 ppg) are also transfers from Washington State and Georgetown, respectively. It should be interesting to see how it all plays out considering all the starting player's ex-schools made it to the big dance, so there is a good chance they could face at least one of those ex-teams.

3. Name Dropping. The Titans have a player named Frank Robinson (no relation to the baseball star Hall of Famer); he averages 16.1 points and 1.3 steals per game. These Titans are giant killers; they slayed the Cal State Northridge Matadors, whose star player went by the name of Chitwood (a la Hoosiers fame). That isn't the only Hollywood connection; Fullerton's famous alumni include actor/director Kevin Costner (who played baseball for the perennial power) and big name roundball alums including former Sun/Laker Cedric Ceballos and former Spur Bruce Bowen. — Shane Igoe

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2. The Badgers' leaders. Leading scorer Brian Butch (whose elbow has not been grotesquely inverted yet this season), has two favorite TV shows: Ice Road Truckers and Deadliest Catch. Hopefully those trucks on Ice Road Truckers don't run over any polar bears. Butch also receives text messages from Erin Andrews after hitting game winning shots, so he has that going for him, which is nice. Butch is also the leading rebounder so we will give you a tidbit on second leading rebounder, Joe Krabbenhoft, who Seth Davis said he was going to name his dog after. Krabbenhoft, who played for a team called the Rough Riders in South Dakota in high school, has had more than 35 separate "stitch events" to his face over the years, according to his mom. This will serve him well if he ever tries out to be Mr. Met. Krabbenhoft is also the team's leader in assists, so we will move along to the No. 2 assist man, Trevon Hughes, a promising sophomore from Queens. Two things about Trevon stand out to me. The first is that his favorite Madison restaurant is Qdoba. Outstanding. You can't go wrong with Qdoba on State Street at 2:30 in the morning. Also, his favorite Halloween costume is a skeleton. I can only hope Trevon's friends also dressed up as skeletons and chased around someone dressed like Daniel LaRusso while yelling such lines as "Sweep the leg!" and "Get him a body bag Johnny, Yah!" while singing "You're the Best Around."

3. Bucky Badger, Available for your wedding. Mr. Buckingham U. Badger, Bucky to his close friends, has been patrolling the sidelines at University of Wisconsin sporting events since 1949. Bucky's name stems from a line in the school's fight song, "On, Wisconsin," where the football team is inspired to "buck right through that line." A live badger was first brought to a football game in 1940 but proved to be too rambunctious and hostile towards people, surprisingly, and was retired to a local zoo. Its offspring went on to star in the Badger, Badger, Badger video and recent Toyota ads. Bucky has become a fan favorite throughout the nation and in 2006 was inducted in to the Mascot Hall of Fame as a charter member of the College Division, along with Aubie from Auburn and YoUDee from Delaware. Along with attending various sporting events and campus activities, Bucky is available for a host of other events where Bucky, from personal experience, stands on his head, polkas, does the Worm, and mingles with the attractive ladies in attendance. No uglies for Bucky! — Ben Goldsworthy

Joe Finley, a player for the University of North Dakota, apparently smacked Wisconsin's Bucky Badger with his stick during a fracas the other night. And now, a price shall be paid!

Finley has been sent to the principal's office and the verdict is in - Big Joe must write a letter of apology to Bucky Badger. Seriously.

Just to be mean, Finley should seal the envelope tight. We'd love to see Bucky try to open it, and then collapsing in frustration. Damned non-opposable thumbs!

Joe Finley Less Popular In Wisconsin [Japers' Rink]

Yes, students with underage drinking citations — or "badges of honor," as we called them in Champaign — will have to take a Breathalyzer test just to enter the stadium before their game Saturday. And they have to blow .000.

That's right, no alcohol in the system whatsoever. So, even if you're feeling sick and take a quick shot of Nyquil, chances are you'll be quarantined from Camp Randall.

Frankly, we think we still have alcohol in our system from the Illinois-Penn State game in 1995. Should be quite the party up there.

Wisconsin Students To Take Breathalyzer Test Before Football Game [Sports By Brooks]

(UPDATE: This story clarifies this a bit.)

But this sort of vandalism, this we can get behind.

Wisconsin hockey player Kyle Klubertanz and former hockey player Jeffrey Slinde were each assessed $200 fines yesterday for tipping over a cow last August in front of the Kohl Center, home of Badger hockey. Klubertanz and Slinde were on their way home from the campus bar scene at about 2 a.m. on Aug. 3 when they decided to tip over one of the more than 100 sculpted and decorated cows which graced various parts of Madison last summer as the Wisconsin CowParade.

We are disappointed it wasn't a real cow, but otherwise, we're absolutely with you in spirit, guys!

Wisconsin Hockey Player: "Because We Were Stupid" [Randball]

WISCONSIN BADGERS

1. Old School Quickies. Bucky Badger's full name is Buckingham U. Badger. Is Minnesota's Golden Gopher that sophisticated? I doubt it. The Badger mascot actually stems from when the territory was dubbed "The Badger State," not because of animals in the region, but rather an association with miners in the 1820's. Prospectors came to the state looking for minerals, and without shelter in the winter, they had to live like badgers in tunnels burrowed into hillsides. Speaking of back in the day, annual tuition in 1900 was $20. Now that would really make paying off school loans a lot easier. One last fact: Did you know 17 Nobel Prizes and 24 Pulitzer Prizes have been awarded to UW alumni & faculty?

2. What You Need to Know About This Team. There's quite the range of personalities on this squad. Forward Marcus Landry says his dream job is a pastor, while guard Trevon Hughes simply states "Victoria's Secret." Uh, OK. Sophomore forward Kevin Gullickson says the best movie he's seen this year is Clerks II. Kevin, go see some more movies. Brian Butch's favorite TV show is "Grey's Anatomy." Do with that what you will. I'm going to cut him some slack after his elbow ended up on the wrong side of his arm against the Buckeyes.

3. What Else You Need to Know About These Guys. Center Greg Steimsma's favorite musical groups are Kenny Chesney & Korn. That's enough to make Peyton Manning excited & scared at the same time. Player of the Year candidate Alando Tucker is averaging 20 points per game and has the uncanny ability to get a shot off anywhere in traffic. He will surely be undervalued by NBA GM's this spring because he is a "tweener." Tucker's cell phone ring is the theme from "The People's Court." Many of us here in Wisconsin are hoping for a Judge Wapner style ruling this March in favor of Wisconsin. — Sam McClone

TEXAS A&M CORPUS CHRISTI ISLANDERS

1. The house that Arrow built. TAMUCC has only been part of the Texas A&M system since 1989. In 1998, they hired South Alabama coach Ronnie Arrow to create a Division-I basketball program out of thin air. He did just that, cobbling together a pair of respectable .500 seasons before earning Independent coach of the year honors three times. This year, the Islanders made their debut in the Southland Conference and compiled a 25-6 overall record. Someone ought to name a building after that guy.

2. Who invited these bastards? Northwestern State University upset No. 3 seed Iowa in the Big Dance in 2006. No doubt they and other Southland conference members were wolf-whistling like inmates at Oz catching sight of fresh meat when TAMUCC appeared on their schedule for the first time this year. Fast-forward to March, and the new guys have a dominant 13-1 record in the conference and have grabbed the auto-bid. Fellas, I think you've been hustled.

3. I haven't seen this many seniors since I visited Grandma at Del Boca Vista. The Islanders can start a very experienced lineup — five seniors, anchored by All-Southland Center Chris Daniels. When one of them needs a breather, two more fourth-year players are on the bench. But don't fret for next year's team. Brilliantly named junior college transfer Scooby Johnson is making his case to fill Daniels' enormous shoes. He was a perfect 5-for-5 for eleven points in the SLC Championship game. Eric Angevine

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Complete NCAA Tournament Schedule

(Last one of the day, honest.)

3. What Else You Need to Know About These Guys. Center Greg Steimsma's favorite musical groups are Kenny Chesney & Korn. That's enough to make Peyton Manning excited & scared at the same time. Player of the Year candidate Alando Tucker is averaging 20 points per game and has the uncanny ability to get a shot off anywhere in traffic. He will surely be undervalued by NBA GM's this spring because he is a "tweener." Tucker's cell phone ring is the theme from "The People's Court." Many of us here in Wisconsin are hoping for a Judge Wapner style ruling this March in favor of Wisconsin. — Sam McClone

The contest was also highlighted by a grotesque elbow injury to Wisconsin center Brian Butch early the game that left his arm looking like something other than an arm. Later, cameras caught Ohio State coach Thad Matta screaming at a ref, having his gum pop out of his mouth and onto the floor, and then re-inserting his gum into his mouth. Also, it was Billy Packer's birthday, so I hope you sent a card.

It was a very closely-contested game... the kind of game which doesn't give you a whole lot of insight as to who would win a rematch, should they meet again. Alando Tucker has 12 points and 8 boards for Wisconsin, while Greg Oden had 11 and 5 for Ohio State.

Ohio State vs. Wisconsin [CBS SportsLine]