Lindsey Vonn Jokes on ESPYs Red Carpet That She Masturbated J.J. Watt Back To Health

Tonight on the ESPYs red carpet, Hannah Storm was set to interview J.J. Watt alongside Lindsey Vonn. Storm’s first question was to ask Watt how he was able to play up to his historic standard last season despite suffering a handful of injuries. “I have a very good training staff and great teammates,” he droned. “That’s what it all comes down to.”

The interview would have continued down this perfectly unremarkable path, but Vonn—with a devilish smile—butted her way in to make everyone at ESPN far more uncomfortable than they would ever like to be during the ESPYs red carpet: “And lots of massages,” she said. “In the groin era.”

In any event, I think we now understand why she and Tiger Woods got along so swimmingly.