No, The CDC Hasn't Quarantined The St. Louis Blues

It was an exciting hour or so this afternoon, when Twitter began passing the word that the Scottrade Center—home of the Blues, who have been dealing with a mysterious flu-like bacterial infection tearing through the roster—was being paid a surprise visit by the Centers for Disease Control. Turned out it was a joke by coach Ken Hitchcock, and some confused reporters and a game of telephone did the rest.

After a little more digging—and some panicked emails from the bewildered Blues communications staff—it emerged that the CDC was not in the arena, and the culprit was a conference call with Hitchcock. Sarcasm, it turns out, does not translate well over the phone.

The Post-Dispatch's Jeremy Rutherford cleared things up:

Everything straight? No one has Ebola, there are no infectious disease experts in hazmat suits roaming the halls of the Scottrade Center, we do not need to incinerate Brian Elliott. The Blues are merely puking and pooping a lot, and two of their best offensive players have concussions. That's all.

Those cancer kids seemed like they had fun, though: