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Lance Thomas Settled His Lawsuit, So You Can Probably Forget Any Improper Benefits Scandal At Duke
Remember two weeks ago, when we heard about Lance Thomas having defaulted on a loan meant to pay for $97,000 worth of jewelry, and we got all excited and wrote this?...

An FSU Fan Spells "Traitor" Like "Trader": Your Roundup Of The Best Signs Behind The College Gameday Crew
It's possible there's just something about that sign up there we don't understand (well, there definitely is—what's an "unc goat"?) but it seems pretty likely they meant "traitor" there instead of "trader." Or maybe it's a Florida fan making fun of Florida State fans? Nah. Let's just go with dumb Fl...

Your College Football Open Thread
Early games—I don't know, maybe Virginia at TCU has potential? West Virginia will probably curb stomp Maryland and that could be fun. Don't forget Northwestern Oklahoma State at UT-San Antionio, which you can watch on Nowhere via your handheld Nothing, at 2 p.m....

How To Eat The New Candy Corn Oreo (Which Isn't As Gross As It Sounds)
Candy corn, folks at home: candy corn sucks. This is neither an ideological nor a conceptual complaint; that is to say, candy corn sucks not because it (almost certainly) originated in some steamy, foul-smelling, nightmarish industrial wasteland, or because it is artificially flavored, or because i...

No, Guys, That Was Not A Boob On ESPN Last Night
Last night, Twitter was abuzz (for a Friday night) about ESPN showing a boob as they panned around for crowd shots during the third quarter of the University of Louisiana-Monroe vs. Baylor game. People may even have formed the same opinion without voicing it on social media, and all in all, it see...

Your Week 4 College Football Master Schedule
Schedule and broadcasters via and cross-referenced with. If you spot any errors, let us know below. Conferences reflect home teams. Ranked teams bold; rankings from the USA Today Coaches Poll. Times (EST)....

The Mets Would Like To Offer You Two Bucks Off Detergent (If A Statistical Oddity Happens)
Two days ago, the Mets finished a series in a night game that had been rained out the previous Tuesday and rescheduled. Partly because of the rainout and partly because, every fall, fans do with the Mets what the sun does with the earth, there were very few people in attendance to see the Mets get ...

Well-Known, Elderly Boxing Promoter: I Smoke Pot All The Time, And So Does Every Other Boxing Promoter
Look at that friggin' pothead up there. That's Bob Arum, founder and CEO of Top Rank, which has promoted fighters from Muhammad Ali to Ray Mancini to Butterbean. Hey Bob, you with us, buddy? Or are you too busy getting stoned on grass to be a productive member of society? Are you too busy going to ...

Deadspin Up All Night: The Good, The Bad, The Ugly
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. The Weekend Mob (Sean, Sam, Isaac, and Burke) will be here soon to yuk it up with you....

Kentucky Freshman Misses Dunk In Most Farcical Way Possible
Nerlens Noel is the prized pupil in John Calipari's newest crop of one-year athlete-students. Last night, Noel and a few other Wildcats players swung by the area where hundreds of fans had camped out for tickets to Big Blue Madness. They even played some pickup with a few children, at least until ...

The Anti-KStew: In Praise Of Jennifer Lawrence
There are many ways to tell if you've become a popular actress. Your name appears above the title on the poster. You're on the covers of magazines. You get an Oscar nomination. Those are all pretty great things. Then, there are those other ways of finding out that you're popular. These are a lot les...

Cockblocked by Purell!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Deadspin's College Football Top 25 Or So: The Sack Of Troy
It's time for a new installment of Deadspin's college football rankings. As always, the teams are ranked according to the logic and values of college football, no matter how bizarre or contradictory they may be. ...

Brady Hoke Ranks Michigan's Best Rivalries
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Sorry MSU, you're second-class....

Dead Letters: "You're A Fucking Idiot. Good Luck To You And Your Idiocy."
Welcome back to Dead Letters, the feature in which we reprint our favorite fan mail from throughout the week. It's like Deleted Scenes, but without all the scuzz money. We should take this moment to remind you that all emails to Deadspin and its editors are on the record unless otherwise specified. ...

Rob Gronkowski Now Has A Cereal With An Imaginative Name
Our favorite human beer keg now has his own cereal, and look at what it's called. Grönk Flakes might seem like ordinary frosted corn flakes, but they come in a box with Gronk's likeness on it, so ... there. Sales pitch, you ask? (I know you didn't, but play along.) Don't worry, Gronk's got you cover...

Baseball Is Banning Melky Cabrera From Winning The Batting Title Because Baseball Sucks
A little over a month ago, Giants outfielder Melky Cabrera tested positive for testosterone and was suspended for 50 games. Old farts got even more upset about it than they usually do, because, when the suspension hit, Cabrera was just a few points behind Andrew McCutchen for the National League bat...

The Deadspin Twitter -100*: The 67 Worst Accounts In Sports
Earlier this week, SI.com published its Twitter 100, a list of Twitter feeds that Sports Illustrated staffers considered "essential to their daily routine for finding news, information and entertainment from the sports world."...

How Those Robinson Cano PED Rumors Got Started
It started as a Twitter rumor, as these things tend to do. Yesterday afternoon, word spread that Robinson Cano had failed a drug test, and his PED suspension would be announced soon. Because similar rumors have recently turned out to be correct, and because Cano is a superstar and a Yankee and playo...