a Page 7527 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

<i>SI's</i> Post-Championship Cover: Recycling A Jim Nantz Pun
Earlier today, we brought you wretched flashbacks from last night, when Jim Nantz, who is usually sharpei if mastiff, deployed the oldest dog-related puns in the bark. It was an announcing boner—the shih tzu see too often on TV. The line stank like poodle the moment we heard it....

Eric Naposki, '80s Linebacker, Will Face Murder Charges; Goodell Probably Cannot Suspend Him
Some geriatric chickens coming home to roost on this one: former Colts and Patriots linebacker Eric Naposki will indeed have to face a jury on murder charges, after a judge declined to dismiss the case against him on Friday....

Apply Within To Become The Next Head Coach Of Princeton Men's Basketball
Sydney Johnson, who coached Princeton to victory over Harvard in the game of the century, and then hung tight with Kentucky in the first round of March Madness, took the head coach job at Fairfield University today. You may see the irony there, since it's usually Princeton that poaches faculty at th...

No One Is Going To Cleveland Indians Games
On Friday, Cleveland opened its season on the losing end of a slugfest with the White Sox. Not the worst opening day possible, however much air Fausto Carmona's 3-inning, 10-run performance sucked out of the building—catching stud Carlos Santana went 3 for 5 with a homer....

We Are All Dave McKenna LXI
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Dan Snyder's dumbass libel suit apologizes to us all for being written by lawyers who were clearly browbeaten by Dan Snyder into writing anything at all, given what a dumbas...

We Were All Waiting For Choir Girls To Harmonize About Derrick Rose's MVP Season To Make It Official
Derrick Rose has officially gotten the "Lexy and Stephany" treatment, and so now is as good a time as any to acknowledge the man who will very likely be named the NBA's 2010-2011 MVP. If there's any sign that you've "made it," this isn't it, but it is a nice gesture nonetheless. We're harboring a ...

Callahan Breaks Ankle After Chara Shot; Rangers' Body Count Piles Up Again
This hurts to watch. In a 5-3 win over Boston last night, the kind of win that Rangers fans have dreamed of, the kind that eliminated Toronto from playoff contention and made it that much harder for Carolina to worm its way in, there was so much good. The Rangers scored five unanswered goals. It s...

John McEnroe Will Swear At You For An Hour For Just $28,500
There's an online charity open through Thursday that will grant two lucky — I mean absurdly wealthy — people an hour-long tennis lesson with John McEnroe at Randall's Island in New York City. The bid is currently at $26,000. The money will go towards saving the earth (literally, I guess?), so we can...

<em>Gros Coup De Hach À Deux Mains</em> Is French For This Terrifying Two-Handed Hockey Slash
http://youtu.be/inncr93Uio A fight broke out at a Quebec "beer league" in the north shore of Montreal last week, and it escalated until a player brought down a logger-style two-handed hockey slash over his opponent's head. JT from 25Stanley.com writes that the league is not pro, and "not even clos...

Cats vs. Dogs: Judgment Day Has Arrived
This is it. The day we've been waiting for. We started this war with 16 supercute kitties and 16 precious puppies. Now, brave warriors — Tiger! Pit Bull! Tabby! MUTT!!! — lie fallen on the bloodied fields. Only two critters remain: Tuxedo and Corgi. One cat. One dog. And there can only be one winner...

EA Sports' <em>NBA Elite</em> Takes The Year Off, New <em>NBA Jam</em> Coming This Fall
After the disastrous, last minute cancellation of NBA Elite 11, Electronic Arts is keeping its basketball sim video game on the bench for another year, saying that it won't ship a new entry in the NBA Live/NBA Elite franchise until… [Kotaku] ...

Phillies Fans Show Commitment To The Team By Doing Keg Stands On The Train
Over the weekend, these Phillies fans celebrated a win by doing keg stands on the subway. What's impressive about this is the fact that somewhere between attending a Phillies game and getting back to their home (or maybe dorm rooms), these guys procured an entire keg and then somehow managed to el...

UConn: The Unappreciated Cinderella
All the talk yesterday was about Butler's Cinderella run to its second consecutive NCAA final, and much of the talk afterward was how disappointing it was to see the Bulldogs fall short again, and in such hideous fashion....

Dookie’s Obnoxious “Open Letter” To Kyrie Irving As Obnoxious As You’d Expect
Last night's NCAA title game was horrible to watch, so thank goodness Chris Cusack of the Duke Chronicle, who was apparently born with a bronzed asshole, is sending the 2011 college basketball season out on a high note by writing this very hateable open letter to Kyrie Irving....

When European Basketball Fans Get Excited, They Light Their Stadiums On Fire
Here we were thinking VCU fans were having "riots" last week, but they're nothing compared to Panathinaikos BC fans. In this European basketball game last Thursday against Barcelona, Greek basketball fans torched their own stadium. Yes, what you see above is a basketball game — not a race riot....

Could The 2012 NFL Draft Become A Double Megadraft?!
I had to go an '80s-themed party with my wife on Saturday night. And I have no clue how they do this, but women always seem to have outfits for themed parties ready on their person at all times. "Oh, there's an '80s party? Let me just grab my oversized Esprit T-shirt, leg warmers, and hair crimper! ...

Snooki Body Slams Michelle McCool, And Other Great Moments From WrestleMania 27
For those of you who didn't have the $54.50 to spend on pay-per-view this weekend, we have compiled the best moment's from Sunday night's WrestleMania 27. There were many highlights: Snooki did a backflip, Stone Cold Steve Austin laid the smack down, and Trish Stratus and Michelle McCool wrestled ...

UConn Provides An Official Celebration Video That Conveniently Excludes Rioting And Fire
A premiere research university like Connecticut has a certain image to uphold, even when its Division I basketball team wins a national championship and the entire student body goes apeshit crazy overnight. At UConn, this video suggests, students join together to peacefully sing "We Are the Champi...

The Quirks Of Gambling On Professional Wrestling
Since the dawn of time, it's been mankind's dream to own the Sports Almanac from Back To The Future Part II. If one could know the result of a sporting event beforehand, one could make untold riches by gambling on it. While the Novikov self-consistency principle — or perhaps Calvinism — means this c...

Jim Nantz Predictably Overdoes It With The Dog Puns
To be fair to Worst Man Jim Nantz, we understand that a Huskies-Bulldogs final is a bit like Christmas for him. A Christmas trimmed with multiple opportunities for insufferable references to dogs and winning. And so when the buzzer sounded, Nantz dropped three dog puns in under 20 seconds. It was ...