a Page 7702 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Weekend Winner: Madison Bumgarner
There isn't much to say about Madison Bumgarner's performance last night that wasn't captured in the three strikeout pitches that briefly turned Vladimir Guerrero into Rob Deer. Watch....

Zach Galifianakis Will Probably Smoke Even More Pot On TV If California Legalizes It
On Friday's Real Time, Out Cold funnyman Zach Galifianakis smoked a joint during a panel discussion of California's Proposition 19 ballot initiative. In related news, Fox News's Margaret Hoover probably listens to a lot of Miles Davis on her days off....

The Chargers Could Be The Best Team In Football
They're not, of course. They're 3-5. But with the number one offense and defense, if there was a Pythagorean W-L metric in football, we'd be fitting Philip Rivers for a Super Bowl ring. But he's a lot like Dan Marino, you see....

Watch Boomer Esiason And Shannon Sharpe Take A Bad Joke To Absurd Lengths
The NFL pregame shows are not funny, yet everyone laughs (more on that in a bit). However, every now and then, one of the terrible jokes takes its terribleness to a new dimension and becomes an absurdist gem....

If You’re Not Rich In America, You Are Fucked
There's an election coming up tomorrow, and I haven't paid any attention to it because, at this point, whatever asshole they stick in office will be no different from the asshole they stuck in there before....

"Thriller" On Ice Much Better Than "Thriller" In Filipino Prison
You know, agility-wise. We're not sure why someone would perform the "Thriller" dance on the ice, but when you think about it, why wouldn't you perform the "Thriller" dance on ice? [Puck Daddy]...

Tottenham’s Benoit Assou-Ekotto Rips Into "Dirty Prostitute Shagger" Rooney
Tottenham Hotspur defender Benoit Assou-Ekotto, best known for his laid-back, "couldn't give a f**k, tbh" approach to professional football, has laid into his Premier League peers, singling Wayne Rooney out for special attention as a "dirty prostitute shagger."...

Big And Li'l Wash's Bender Continued On Into The Night
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Somebody Is Desperately Seeking Tim Tebow's Poo
Tim Tebow's pro team had a game across the Atlantic today, so I have no idea why the president of a portable-shitter company is talking about rooting around for Tebow dung. But Scott Taylor of Advanced Sanitation is....

Poll: Which Injury Will Hurt More?
On one hand, the busted-up jaw that Brett Favre suffered a couple hours ago had to smart quite a bit if this picture's any indication....

Your World Series Game Four Open Thread
It's time for Deep Thoughts from the Game Four Starters....

If The Whole Favre-Sterger Costume Thing Was A Contest, Chris From Austin Won (NSFW)
I'll let Chris explain how Chris "went the extra mile and dominated the Jenn Sterger costume competition."...

What Bloggers Are Saying About World Series Game Four
Here are eight links to what guys and gals with keyboards are saying about World Series Game Four....

Let The Pouty Donovan McNabb Show Begin!
Almost always liked Donovan McNabb while an Eagle despite realizing, early on, that he was the king of pouty, passive-aggressive, veiled digs at people - disguised as saying "the right thing" - when he didn't get his way....

Ashton, Demi In Sticky Recruiting Situation With Iowa Men's Basketball Team
According to the Des Moines Register, the University of Iowa has "admitted NCAA recruiting violations that involve husband-wife film stars Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore." Translation: They let a couple of recruits meet the "actor" and "actress."...

Your NFL Late Games Open Thread
This afternoon, Randy Moss faces the team he was on 25 days ago. Tonight, the New Orleans Saints try to earn a Guinness Book of World Records entry for Halloween parties prior to the Steelers game....

Texas H.S. Football Team Loses 12-OT Game
With a playoff berth on the line, the Nacogdoches Dragons and Jacksonville Indians were tied at 28 at the end of regulation Friday night. Final score: 84-81....

Here Are Many More Shots of People Pretending To Be Brett Favre And Jenn Sterger
It's funny because I'm going to picture the chick painted in black throughout the Vikings/Patriots game, and I'll bet you will too....

Your NFL Early Games Open Thread
Is there an interesting game in this bunch besides, maybe, Packers/Jets? If so, do tell. And, phrase your answer in the form of a delusion....

Jenn Sterger Likely To Meet With NFL Officials (Updated)
ESPN quoted Jenn Sterger's attorney Joe Conway as saying, "There is a very strong likelihood that Ms. Sterger will agree to meet with the NFL in their ongoing investigation....