a Page 7715 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Your Religion/Textile/Baserunning Metaphor Of The Day
Anyone want to explain this one? "What appeared to be 90 feet, teased from the fabric of New York Yankees resolve, with each tug brought more yards of grace."...

Your "A.J. Burnett Is Actually Starting A Playoff Game" Rangers-Yankees Open Thread
Burnett actually has pretty good career numbers against Texas's lineup. Of course, Burnett also used to be pretty good. One thing's for sure: the 2002 Niners-Giants Wild Card game on ESPN2 will get better ratings....

Vulcan Mascot's Decision To Light A Homecoming Float On Fire Was Highly Illogical
A California University of Pennsylvania—huh—student who plays the school's Vulcan mascot has been charged with setting fire to a homecoming parade float last Saturday....

The Year In NFL Concussions (So Far): A Horrifying Video Compilation
By our admittedly rough count, there have been at least 46 concussions in the NFL this season. We've found video for 14 of them — clean hits and dirty ones, big hits and relatively minor ones. Watch and cringe and then wonder how many of the names in the list below belong to future ALS patients....

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What It Feels Like To Get A Concussion
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Redskins tight end Chris Cooley....

Brett Favre Had His Hands Full With NFL Security Today
NFL investigators are done giving Brett Favre's penis the third degree, at least for now....

Your "Baserunners Wearing Jackets!" Phillies-Giants Open Thread
It's a 1pm local start for San Franciscans; an excuse to mentally check out of work a little early for the rest of us. Use this space to marvel at Cody Ross's inevitable home runs....

Jeff Garcia Pisses In Hand Towels, And The Art Of Breaking Thumbs In The Loose-Ball Pile
Today, mongrels, we're excerpting from Anthony Gargano's tremendous NFL Unplugged, which offers a ruthlessly entertaining portrait of the NFL. It has all the lawlessness, the poop, the broken fingers, the organized insanity that the league would prefer you not know about....

America Explains Itself
We asked you, the fine television viewers of America, why you preferred a crap regular season football game to a great playoff baseball game. You responded, justifying your choice for four reasons....

No, ESPN Did Not Tell The MNF Coaches To Take Timeouts (UPDATE)
Paranoia swept the blogosphere this morning, as word spread like wildfire that ESPN had told the Jaguars and Titans to use their timeouts at the end of a blowout to get more commercial breaks. Great story. Too bad it's not true....

Fans Taunt Canadian Football Team, Team Responds With Fists
A brawl broke out during an Ontario junior league football game between the Hamilton Hurricanes and the St. Leonard Cougars this weekend. Hamilton, Ont., police are not yet investigating as no charges have been filed. [The Spec; video via]...

Our Resident Sex Addict Settles A Bet Regarding Decuple Penetration
Before we get to the funbag, a quick announcement: From now on, every funbag will end with the Email Of The Week. The person who sends the winning email each week gets a prize. IT'S TRUE! Not only do you get to experience the glory of being immortalized forever in funbag form, but you also get a ran...

This Dude Has A Religious Experience With Madden
Greg Jennings goes 99 yards on a broken leg. Exciting, if it were real and not a video game. But that doesn't stop him from creaming his pants over it. [VERY NSFW LANGUAGE]...

Video: We Ask Jose Canseco About His Missing Chandeliers
Earlier today, I scuttled over to 8th and Broadway in Manhattan. The goal: ask Jose Canseco if he'd gotten his "chandeleers" back. Was it a success? Yes. Yes, it was. As much as anything involving Jose Canseco can be called a success....

Backheel Goal Scorer Returns With More Fancy Goal Scorin'
Another all-worldie from Irish striker Matty Burrows of Glentoran FC. The terrible goalkeeping sort of takes the shine off this one, though....

Goddamnit It, America
You could have watched an exciting, important game, a tense changing of the guard of the best playoff pitchers ever. Or you could have watched Kerry Collins and Trent Edwards trade handoffs in a meanlingless AFC South contest. Guess which you chose....

Last Night's Winner: None More Black (Quarterbacks)
After Vince Young and David Garrard exited with injuries, week 6 saw only three black QBs finish the game for their team — easily the lowest number since people started noting this sort of thing. Maybe Rush Limbaugh is last night's winner....

Cliff Lee Dropping His Crotch On Brett Gardner's Head Seems Like A Metaphor Of Some Kind
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Perhaps The Yankees Could Use This Inspiration From The Late MC Freddy Sez
The Yankees are now down 2-1 in the ALCS. In August, Freddy Sez got to meet with Robinson Cano, and this gem of a moment was caught on tape. Skip to 1:35 for "a little rap that I made myself."...