a Page 7784 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Barcelona Turn On Sprinklers To Dampen Inter Celebrations
Of course, the law dictates that you can't just shoot people in the face for getting on your nerves any more......

Drew Brees, <em>Times-Picayune</em> Leave The Yard In Entirely Different Ways
"A packed house at Zephyr Field learned two things Wednesday night. One, that child sexual abuse is a big problem, and two, that New Orleans Saints quarterback Drew Brees can smack home runs from either side of the plate." [Times-Picayune; related]...

The Bitch Slap Heard 'Round The Bleachers
When they're not humping each other in bathrooms or throwing beer or being sorta racist, the denizens of Wrigley Field are apparently slapping each other in the face. Except they're being sorta racist then, too....

First Career Home Run Goes Right Through Dad's Car Window
Shane Trevino got a rare trifecta: he hit his first high school home run, probably got his father fired, and made his dad take off his belt, all with one swing of the bat....

What Is The Absolute Worst Movie Death To Suffer?
The first round of the NBA playoffs is almost over. ONLY THREE WEEKS LEFT UNTIL ROUND 2! Anyway, this is just about the time of the season where I start paying attention and stuff. And while my basketball knowledge is essentially a blank Aqua Doodle, there is one thing I wanted to mention about LeBr...

Wince-Inducing Story Of The Day: Miguel Olivo Has A Urethra Of Steel
The Rockies catcher passed a kidney stone during a recent game against the Diamondbacks, then he threw his gear back on and later singled. "I can handle pain a little bit," he said. "Let's play baseball." [Last Angry Fan]...

New USA Kit Looks Good On A Pretty Lady
Today, Nike unveiled the USA's World Cup home jersey. Solid, if unspectacular. To make it more palatable, here it is on a Playboy model. [Playboy] (Page is SFW, just don't click on anything.)...

<em>Are We Winning?</em> The Book FAQ
This Tuesday, my new book, Are We Winning? Fathers and Sons and the New Golden Age of Baseball, is unleashed upon an unsuspecting populace. Since you probably don't actually have questions about it, I'll make some up and answer them....

Henrik Lundqvist, Possibly Making It With A Swedish Princess
After calling off her wedding to her cheating fiancé, Princess Madeleine of Sweden has fled to New York — and the arms of the Rangers goalie, speculate the Scandinavian tabloids. [NYDN]...

Let The National Shaming Of This Flag Football Coach Commence
With the other team on a clear path to the end zone, Bennett Wyche — last season's Flag Football Coach of the Year — reached out from the sidelines to grab an opponents flag. [South Florida Sun-Sentinel]...

Last Night's Winner: Les Habitants (Of Their Mothers' Basements)
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the Poindexters and figure filberts who knew all along that the roundly dismissed Canadiens were dangerous....

The <em>Boston Globe</em>, Fanning The Flames Of Sectarian Violence
The Globe pulled a column and issued an apology today after it managed to offend both sides of the famed Celtic-Rangers rivalry, no mean feat. Now Scotland has it out for the writer, the paper, and the city of Boston....

Red Wings Fined For Violating Bizarre Airport Curfew
The Wings owe the city of San Jose some cash, all because their team flight landed in San Jose too late at night. Gamesmanship, or just a stupid law?...

Detroit Lions Linebacker Goes To Target, Loads Up On Jerky, Tampons, For Some Reason
Detroit linebacker Zack Follet, survivor of an encounter with regular lions, got so excited by the football Lions' drafting of a boy named Suh that he went to Target, helmet on head, to buy Band-Aids and tampons for soon-to-be-injured opponents. [Detroit4Lyfe]...

"Balzer" Girl Just Doesn't Have The Same Ring To It
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day...

Bango The Buck's First Post-Ladder-Dunk Interview
Fresh off his monumental feat during Game 4, Bango the Buck sat down with the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel's Don Walker to discuss the dunk, his training, his fears, and his hopes for the future. Highlights inside....

The Deadspin Guide To Naming Your Fantasy Team
CBS released a list of the 200 most common fantasy baseball team names; they're generally about as uncreative and unfunny as you'd expect. Here are some ground rules to make sure you're not the laughingstock of your laughingstock fantasy league....

Blackhawk Duncan Keith Doesn't Appreciate You Prying Into His Finances
This video, taken during Game 4 of the Chicago-Nashville series, shows a Predators fan/heckler getting under the skin of defenseman Duncan Keith. Keith's Norris Trophy-nominated response? A refreshing Gatorade spritz. Points for accuracy immediately deducted for being a ninny. [ChicagoNow]...

All Your Fantasies Can Come True, With Vintage Laker Girl Outfits
For the low, low price of $10,000, you can own two outfits from 1979, the rookie year for the Laker Girls. Make a Halloween costume! Pleasure yourself to them! Become a shot girl in Branson! [eBay, via Brooks]...

What It's Like To Eat Dinner With Bill Murray
So, either your letters have been answered or you're Wes Anderson: How do you navigate the minefield of social norms and potential faux pas and handle dinner with Bill Murray? New York Magazine's Jada Yuan lays it all out....