a Page 7796 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Don't Tell The Children; Celebrity Boxing Matches Were Fixed
A celebrity boxing promoter is rigging the outcome of his fights, which he didn't have a license to stage anyway. Remember, this only concerns boxing. David Arquette still won the WCW Heavyweight Championship fair and square. [AP]...

Watch The Houston Rockets Murder Music
Luis Scola, Chase Budinger and Shane Battier take the stage for Battier's karaoke fundraiser. I'd offer something funnier than "people donated money to get them to stop singing," but I'm busy trying to stanch my ear bleeding. [Click2Houston, via Traina]...

Life Is Full Of Choices: A Weekly Roundup From The Tips Forum
We get many fantastic tips in our inbox and from the #tips forum. Some are not so great. These are some of those #tips we specifically overlooked or ignored. All apologies....

Hey Look, Everyone, It’s A Liverpool FC Fashion Show!
More than most, footballers love to dress up in gorgeous new outfits and really make a lads day out of it....

Tailpipe: "Like A Warrior In Battle. Hubba Hubba."
We recently discovered the incredible phenomenon of NASCAR-themed romance fiction, stories filled with passion and grease and beautiful people being driven swiftly to ecstasy and Victory Lane alike. What follows is a brief selection from one such tale....

A Softball Diamond Is Probably Not What She Had In Mind
A Cincinnati-area softball coach proposed to the coach of his rival team before their game Wednesday. Somehow, I don't think their players will be following suit (not in Ohio, anyway). [Enquirer]...

The Curious Case Of The Ball State Ass Slapper
A serial bike-mounted butt-slapper has been terrorizing Ball State's campus. Dangerous sexual predator, or harmless fun? The student body is torn....

Dallas-Area Cheerleaders Piss Team Spirit, Piss
KXAS-TV does one of those routine cheerleaders-force-other-cheerleaders-to-drink-urine stories, only this one involves some gross-out B-roll and a "bad taste in their mouth" zinger as the kicker. Kudos to the awesomely monikered reporter, Ashanti Blaize. [Fat White Guy]...

John Paul Stevens Says Babe Ruth Called His Shot
How does he know? He saw it in person. Dude's old as dirt, and he's still never seen the Cubbies win it all....

Penn State Kicker Drinks Like A Sorority Girl
Anthony Fera, PSU's sophomore kicker, was cited for underage drinking. His beverage of choice? Cruzan Mango Rum. Easy there, tiger. [Post-Gazette]...

Your Masters Open Thread (To Promote Discussion)
Possible topics for discussion: K.J. Choi and Fred Couples's taste in footwear. Talk below....

Last Night's Winner: Golf Pundits
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the fellows who talk, write, and tweet about golf, and who yesterday got plenty to talk, write, and tweet about. Old people! Flowering shrubs! Asians! Redemption!...

Shameless Couple Having Bathroom Sex Tarnishes Another Sports Stadium
Since one horny couple decided to sully Cowboys Stadium with their filthy, filthy bathroom sex last September, there haven't been many other drive-by humping incidents ruining sporting events. Until now. The Chicago Tribune's John Kass has the terrifying story....

Mark Sanchez Is Poised ... To Be A Whiffenpoof
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Loneliness, Thy Name Is Pirates Fandom
Reader Chris sends along this picture of The Omega Man of Pirates fans. Why stay in the second row? Does PNC Park employ totalitarian ushers? Is he afraid of looking the fool should a foul ball approach? Fascinating to ponder....

Erin Andrews Still Single-Handedly Determining The Fate Of Her Profession, Gender
Erin Andrews, cha-cha-cha superstar and twirly catch-all symbol for whatever some columnist is feeling cranky about today, has "made a fool out of herself and a sham of her profession," reports one such cranky columnist. Andrews begs to differ....

The Spoiler’s 10 Greatest Ever Football Teams
Should this year's Barcelona manage to retain the Champions League, and keep Real from pipping them in La Liga, they might yet be considered one of the greatest sides of them all....

Villanova Pregnancy Hoax Email Results In Confusion, Death Threats
Yesterday, in an attempt to debunk the Fisher-Reynolds pregnancy melodrama rumor that spread via email for the past couple weeks, it appears I became the Big East's Furman Bisher instead. To clarify: It's a hoax. Like this. And this....

DePaul Wraps Up Its Coaching Search From Hell By Pissing Off The Wrong People
Following a blunder- and rejection-filled search, DePaul finally decided on Clemson's Oliver Purnell. Sounds like a good hire: basement-dwelling big-conference team nabs someone who marginally improved another basement-dwelling big-conference team. So why are Chicago hoops figures apoplectic?...

Slovenian Hockey Players Celebrate Title By Beating Up Coach
Six players from Slovenia's league champion, Acroni Jesenice, have been booted from the team after beating up their head coach in drunken post-game celebration. It's okay, though because he totally deserved his thrashing....