a Page 7871 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Glenn Beck Is (Gasp!) Right About Football Helmets
Professional lunatic Glenn Beck has argued—based on this article in the Wall Street Journal—that football helmets are evil, because they make players reckless and, eventually, crippled. It's pains me to say so....but he has a point....

Pitchers Make Everyone Swoon (AND ANGRY!)
Rich Harden signs his life over to Arlington and El Fightins will do the awkward here's-your-jersey presentation with Roy Halladay at 5 p.m. Buster Olney's grinding the Jamey Carroll beat. And why does Buster only follow this dude? HOTFUCKINGSTOVE....

Alabama Fans Hope To Shut Down State For One Week In January
You're probably aware that the University of Alabama has canceled any classes that might possibly interfere with students' drinkingenjoyment of the BCS Championship, but now some lawyers have asked a judge to shut down the state's legal system as well....

McNair's Death "Scared" Some NFL Players Into Monogamy. For A Little While.
CBSSports' Mike Freeman (and other reporters) interviewed some NFL players on the state of NFL side projects. Has it decreased since McNair was shot by his mistress?: "I admit once time passed. I went back to my old ways." [CBSSports]...

Tina Trahan: Tiger's Social Linchpin
This lovely woman standing next to this intimidating gentleman is named Tina Trahan. Yes, not Pam. Tina. She's not a madam or a VIP party-planner, but she's got some curious connections to Tiger and lots of other people....

The Toughest Fantasy Football Defeat Of All
Fidelity Investments recently fired four employees for organizing fantasy football leagues, because investment bankers have very strict rules about only gambling with other people's money. [Star-Telegram, via Yahoo; photo via]...

This Week: Gilt Man's Best Deals on the Coolest Gear
Join Gilt Man today for deep discounts on awesome stuff from Penguin, American Apparel, Flip Video, Gordon Rush, and Jack Spade. Boom goes the dynamite. Sale runs today at noon through EOD Friday, so Gilt Man up now....

Erin Andrews Demands A Pound Of Flesh
Andrews faced her stalker yesterday, telling a judge: "I walk in crowds and I see him in my peripheral vision. ... I don't know why he chose me. But I hope he never sees the light of day again." [NYDN]...

South Florida Player's Brother: "Jim Leavitt Is Not A Very Nice Man"
The South Florida Slapping Saga has taken another confusing family turn as the brother of the walk-on allegedly hit by coach Jim Leavitt has stepped into the fray to defend his sibling and confirm what his father hastily denied yesterday....

Last Night's Winner: Boring Guys
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke, who was named Time's Person Of The Year. Finally, old white bankers get their due!...

UT Hostesses Now Recruiting Bruce Pearl
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

A Golf Porn Lawsuit That Has Nothing To Do With Who You Think
There are many ways of getting yourself banned from exclusive country clubs. Being poor or a minority are probably the most common, but letting them film a golf-themed porno there is probably the most exciting....

Follow In Flip Saunders' Footsteps, If That's What You Want To Do With Your Life
ESPN is teaming up with the Wizards to allow you to design an inbounds play for them. If your submission doesn't immediately lead to a turnover, they'll probably name you head coach. [ESPN]...

I Can't Believe I'm Defending Michael Irvin
Irvin says he'd trade his three Super Bowl rings and his Hall of Fame induction to have one undefeated season. Despite the pundits' ensuing ridicule and scorn, his hypothetical choice could be the right one....

Proof That JaMarcus Russell Isn't Even UFL Quality
The Raiders have signed J.P. Losman, fresh off a championship with the Locomotives. This could be a redux of the Kurt Warner story, only if Warner had already failed in the NFL and his top receiver was Louis Murphy. [ESPN]...

Forget It Jake. It's Dodgertown.
The Frank McCourt divorce gets more bizarre by the day. After last week's mini-scandal featuring a homewrecking chauffeur and the Taiwanese goverment, I have to wonder why this isn't the biggest sports story going....

Tiger Played The Senior Tour, Too
Your evening Tiger Woods roundup: Everyone meet Theresa Rogers, paramour No. 14, who at 40-something years old represented a bit of an uphill lie for young Tiger....

Big Ten Considers Desperate Plea For Attention
The Big Ten is sad because no one pays attention to it after Thanksgiving, so it wants to add a new school and rebuild its entire organizational structure to play one extra football game. I have a better solution....

Mailbag: Getting Old Blows
Time for your Deadspin Open Mailbag Tuesday. Email us here or submit your questions via Twitter. This week, we're covering belly buttons, nude modeling, iced poops, and dick pinching....

Eritrean Soccer Team Apparently Not Big Fans Of Eritrea
A dozen members of Eritrea's national football team mysteriously "disappeared" after playing in a tournament in Kenya. (Not because of foul play. They are presumed to have defected.) Have they tried looking in Mozambique? [Guardian]...