a Page 7874 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Tiger's Teeth Apparently No Longer Perfect
Your evening Tiger update: The UK Sun is reporting that, on the morning of the accident, Elin did to her husband's teeth with a cell phone what she would later do to his SUV's rear window with a sand wedge....

Notre Dame Gets Its Angry, Egotistical Man
The South Bend Tribune is reporting that after an earlier feint toward UConn, Notre Dame has made its decision and Cincinnati's Brian Kelly will take the reigns in South Bend. But is he a big enough jerk?...

White Men Can Jump To Conclusions
A few days ago, ESPN's Outside the Lines did another of those features in which everyone puts on his Concerned Face and talks very gravely about Serious Things. Like, for instance, why there aren't more white dudes in the NBA....

Excavating Bill Simmons: NY Mag Writers Take On That Big Ol' Book Of Basketball
Jonathan Lethem; Sam Anderson; Sherman Alexie; Bethlehem Shoals. Oh, and Tommy Craggs, who takes off his angry pants for a little bit but manages to somehow squeeze in a reference to Astral Weeks. [NYmag]...

Sacramento Kings Solve All Their Woes With Dollar Beer Night
The Sacramento NBA team will be appearing on ESPN (national television!) for the first time in two years next week, and they want to make their return extra-super special. How to do that? A packed house of stone cold drunks....

The Five Stages Of Football Grief. Jamboroo, Week 14
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Find more of his stuff at his Twitter feed....

<em>Life & Style</em> Goes Fishing For Tiger Tales
A Life & Style reporter is searching for information about Joslyn James. If anyone can help her, please contact her immediately. I won't be able to help, unfortunately. Her email, after the jump....

Decade Retrospective: 2005
We continue our year-by-year look back at the decade with the year 2005, back when REO Speedwagon was topping the charts, back when George Clooney was just that weird guy from "The Facts Of Life." Simple times....

On Baxter! On Keaton! On Ridge, Ronjohn and Blaise!
Because it's shaping up to be that kind of day....let's mock some prep school kids. Inside Lacrosse presents its All-Name Team. Apparently, someone actually named their son Remington Steele. A lot of Stephanie Zimbalist fans out there, I guess....

An Angry And Bewildered Nation Watches Rick Reilly® Ruin <em>SportsCenter</em>
Someone let Rick Reilly® anchor the West Coast edition of SportsCenter again, and sweet sassy molassy was he awful....

BREAKING: Barry Bonds Doesn't Play Baseball Anymore
A shocking Deadspin investigation has revealed that despite frequent mentions in the national media and his ubiquitous presence in any discussion about baseball and its steroid policies, Barry Bonds is not actually a Major League Baseball player anymore....

The Machine Won: 10 Preposterous Moments From <em>SI</em>'s 1996 Tiger Woods Profile
In 1996, Sports Illustrated named a 20-year-old Tiger Woods its Sportsman of the Year, and Gary Smith's accompanying story portrayed a young man who somehow combined the best parts of Doogie Howser and Buddha. It seemed like a stretch....

Last Night's Winner: Mack Brown
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Texas coach Mack Brown, who is about to get seriously paid. This is what is known as "striking while the iron is hot."...

Seven-Foot Santa Monster Terrifies Local Toddlers
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Tiger Now Crushing Children's Dreams
A Wisconsin middle school band had hoped to fund their trip to Disney World by auctioning off an athlete's autographed photo. That athlete? Tiger Woods. That auction? Last weekend. Shit....

The IOC Erases History
Remember the women's 100m race at the Sydney games? No you don't. Because according to the IOC, it never happened....

And You Thought VORP Was Confusing
Someone much smarter than me uses something called Bayesian inference to argue that umpires ought to give a wider strike zone to pitchers with reputations. Any nerd commenters want to explain this to the rest of us? [Baseball Analysts]...

Oakland's Happy Family Just Got A Little More Dysfunctional
Randy Hanson, noted coach punchee, is back working with the Raiders. Even for a historically feckless franchise, this is surprising. Let's look at the possibilities....

Tim Thomas Brawl Classes Up Denny's
The Mavericks forward was involved in an early morning throwdown at a Dallas Denny's today. Nothing good happens at Denny's at 3 a.m. Nothing good happens at Denny's....
