a Page 7887 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Maurice Jones-Drew To Miss Fantasy Playoffs Because Of His Brilliant Play
Are you one of the 10,000 (ESPN) fantasy GMs who lost because MJD took a knee rather than score a touchdown? Well, so is he. But remember, he had 145 yards and a TD anyway, so quit bitching. [ESPN]...
Put On Your Whitest Whites: It's Klan Night In Oxford!
Booted from his fraternity, Michael Hudec will finally have an organization on campus that cottons to his beliefs. That's right: the KKK is coming to Ole Miss....
The Last Time Russia Pushed Westward, It Didn't End Well
The KHL is expanding, adding a Stockholm-based team in hopes of drawing more western talent. A Russian-based league with a team in a non-Soviet country? That's as absurd as the NHL expanding into Canada. [On The Forecheck]...
In Blackout Roulette, Jags To Bet It All On...Teal?
Sixteen years ago, one grassroots organization brought the Jaguars to Jacksonville. Now they're back, doing everything they can to keep them there. (Note: "everything they can" appears limited to coupons for nachos and soda at one game.)...
The Derek-Jeter-Hits-The-Beach-With-A-Starlet Photos Will Make You Miserable
Our Captain is off on his annual off-season jaunt to a humid location with a young, bikini-clad actress-person whom he will most likely never settle down with and, unfortunately for him, there was a slimy photog in the palm tree....
Jayson Williams Saga May Finally Be Over
According to the AP, Jayson Williams (yes, that one) has accepted a plea deal that will send him to jail for at least 18 months for the accidental shooting of Costas Christofi in 2002....
Colorado May Consider Bake Sale In Order To Buy Out Coach
Colorado's football team stinks and no one really cares for head coach Dan Hawkins, but the usual solution—throwing money at the problem—just isn't going to work this time. They don't have any money left to throw....
Pre-Thanksgiving, Coke Pinkies And Nazi Dinosaurs. Jamboroo, Week 11
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Find more of his stuff at his Twitter feed....
ESPN Ombudsman Report: 2,800 Words, "Horndoggery" Not Among Them
"Honesty with your audience is not a self-serving cop-out, and it's not an apology....It's a form of respect. When those whose trust you seek to maintain encounter behavior that is out of character, some form of explanation may be required."...
Decade Retrospective: 2000
We commence the year-by-year look back at the decade with the year 2000, back when there were rocket packs, back when we all thought O.J. Simpson was just the smiling guy from the Hertz commercials. Simple times....
The Case Against Michael David Barrett, Cont'd
This replaces the criminal complaint lodged against the alleged peephole-customizer last month. The feds additionally accuse Barrett of filming Erin Andrews at a hotel in Columbus, Ohio, adding yet another state to his hornball tour of the country....
Yet Another Reason Not To See <em>The Blind Side</em>
Michael Lewis, author of the book that is currently being butchered at a theater near you, reports that presidential-blowjob sleuth Ken Starr was so moved at a screening of the movie that he cried. [NYMag.com]...
Your Daily Mark Mangino Harassment Update
Former Kansas football players are coming out of the woodwork now to tell the us all how awfully "inappropriate" Mark Mangino is when he yells at his players. It's clear that when it comes to emotional devastation, he's the king....
Sports Cards Can Still Make You Rich, Pathetic
Two private card collectors swapped a pristine Michael Jordan rookie card and a $200,000 check, but wait until you hear what exciting plans the new owner of the card has in store. Absolutely nothing!...
Last Night's Winner: France Haters
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like France, who finally regained their rightful place as Europe's most reviled country. We really missed dumping on those cheese eaters....
OSU Students Wallow In Their Own Urine
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
Old Logic: France Surrenders. New Logic: France Cheats
Ireland's World Cup dreams die, and France's live on, thanks to a goal that saw two strikers clearly offside, and a pair of blatant Thierry Henry handball assists to boot. The Irish, as you might expect, aren't taking this well....
Chicago Has Pretty Much Completely Turned On Jay Cutler
It's bad; they've taken to calling him "Jay McNown." But the beleaguered QB finds an unlikely defender in the father of former Bears washout Rex Grossman. Dan Grossman's endorsement floated 50 yards and was intercepted by Brian Griese. [Chicago Tribune]...
Watch This, Then Go Check Your Water Supply For Drugs
No words...They should have sent a poet....
Los Angeles: Where Football Goes To Die
The UFL's Locomotives had planned to play a "home game" at the Home Depot Center Friday, but canceled it after concerns about ticket sales. Fitting, since good taste drove the Rams and Raiders out of town too. [LA Daily News]...