a Page 8222 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Morten Andersen Retires
Someone finally informed the NFL's all-time leading scorer that he is no longer in the NFL, so he officially announced his retirement today from Denmark. Andersen played 25 years for five different teams and the 63-yarder he hit in 1981 is still a Big Ten record. [AP/Google]...
SHOTY First Round: Chris Cooley Vs. Caitlin Davis
Just two more first-round matchups until we reach the Elite Eight. We haven't had any truly close matchups yet, though it's early. Today, it's Hot Pants/ Naked Playbook Guy Vs. Hot Pants / Goofy Facebook Lady....
Will Cubs Be Destitute, Eating From Dumpsters In 2009?
With the Wall Street Journal reporting that the Tribune Company has hired bankruptcy advisers, Chicago Cubs fans are preparing for the worst (as if they ever prepare for the best). Will the team, which is owned by the Tribune, be able to afford Jake Peavy? Will a reputable buyer ever come forward? W...
The Cultural Evolution of Brian Collins' Unwanted Catchphrase Continues
Via World of Isaac:...
Morning Blogdome: Anna Rawson Finally Finds Work
• A Cinderella story?: Relax, everyone. Anna Rawson earned back her LPGA tour card. Like it's even possible for you to watch more LPGA golf. [Fan IQ]...
Another Alternate Erin Andrews Grip
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...
Clinton Portis Can Carry The Load, But Can He Carry His Team To The Playoffs?
The Ravens are coming off of a huge win against Philadelphia and a romp against divisional glory hole, Cincinnati, and they're only a game out of their division lead. They're riding high on their resilient Ray Lewis-driven defense and enjoying an incredible rookie year from quarterback Joe Flacco. B...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while Meshach Taylor pops out of your mouth......
The Bills Are Pro-Choice About JP Losman, Plus More Avery-kkake In A Super-Sized Blogdome
I got two of these today; this is one of those screenshots announcing that Bills quarterback JP Losman...I'm guessing he was in their version of the Wildcat and they needed a way to document that somehow. Either way, it's a damn fine description of the backup quarterback's woes, as his team has los...
FOX Broadcasts Some Viking Locker Room Dong
Thanks to everyone that sent us pics of this. It's hard to get emotional about Vikings head Brad Childress' son going into the Marines when there's all this flaccid black cock staring me in the face. Pretty sure Heidi Klum has the same problem when she's taping Project Runway, but we're getting off-...
NFL Update 2: A Game Colder Than Your Obese Sister-In-Law
Dallas (8-4) at Pittsburgh (9-3). Wind chill this morning was at 7 degrees, which means Steelers coach Mike Tomlin will come out wearing Bermuda shorts and a tank top. Wade Phillips will enjoy one of the few benefits of "natural insulation" today. I don't understand how, at 8-4, everyone is counting...
Michael Vick Spent $201K On The Day He Went To Jail
First off, I think it's a ton of shit when the media point to professional athletes as people that "have it all," as they've been saying about Plaxico Burress, for example. One thing they don't have? Common sense, apparently (who wears sweatpants to a club?) Michael Vick reaffirmed as much, when a r...
NFL Update 1: Fantasy Football Is Not My Forte
Chicago 20, Jacksonville 3. If you drafted Matt Forte in fantasy this year, JUST SHUT UP ALREADY! Yes, nice job taking a risk on a guy that was in every magazine's top 15 RBs. You're a real riverboat gambler! Forte has 52 yards on the day and the scorn of 11 of every 12 fantasy owners....
How Great Was That Play? So Great I Could Punch My Coach In The Face!
BeamerBall had a new wrinkle installed before its clash with Boston College in the ACC Championship yesterday. Anytime Virginia Tech comes up with a big play, someone walks up next to Coach Beamer and knocks him upside the head. Must've worked, as the Hokies took care of business yesterday and walke...
1 PM Games: Your Last-Minute NFL Cheat Sheet
Atlanta (8-4) at New Orleans (6-6). The Atlanta Falcons would get the 6-seed in the NFC playoffs if the NFL season ended last week. New Orleans needs to win here just to stay alive in the wild card race (they're tied for 10th with the Bears), but the Saints really need to win out or their season is ...
For Your Viewing Pleasure
• 1:00 — Bowling: Lumber Liquidators PBA Tour Is there something with those 80s-ish PBA commercials on ESPN that I just don't get? Big hair and tight pants don't exactly inspire me to watch bowling on TV. Even if I do get to wear my own shoes. [ESPN]...
Brent + Mack 4 Ever!
It looks like Texas is being left out of the national championship game, even though they beat one team that is going. That hasn't stopped Oklahoma from creating some fantastic signage. Don't forget to send your links, images, and tips in (use the tips email or send it to me directly...either way)....
Closerkkake: Those Guys Really, REALLY Like Florida
Florida and Oklahoma appear poised for a showdown in the BCS Championship. Florida dazzled previously-undefeated Alabama with an array of offensive speed and play-calling, set against the backdrop of a tandem suckoff by Verne Lundquist and Gary Danielson. Last night was the first time I've heard two...